Page 12 of Rancher's Strength

“Where should I sleep?” Her voice was hushed, hurt lingering in her words. She had caused it, and I didn’t want to have to justify her decision anymore.

“There’s a bed in my office, I’ll show you.” Setting my beer on the coffee table, I wandered to the office and flicked on the light. Lexie froze in the doorway as she scanned the wall of screens, and her frown wasn’t quick enough to hide her surprise.“I monitor the cameras around the ranch. We’re having a bit of trouble.”

“What kind of trouble?” And there she was, lawyer Lexie, ready to take on the world and ensure it was set ablaze if the people she loved were in trouble.

“Enough that it’s too much to get into tonight.” Running my hand through my hair, I shook my head and huffed out a sigh.

The last thing I wanted was to involve her and the kids in whatever issues we were facing. Each person on the ranch brought a new danger, and I’d rather die than let Lexie, Ruby, and Sawyer get caught up in it. I couldn’t endure any more months like the ones we had just finished.

“Is this about all the land titles I’ve been pulling for the guys?” She sat on the bed and fell back, resting her head on the pillow. So many things were the same, but we were different people.

“What do you mean?”

“Someone calls almost once a week asking me to fit them into my day.” She grinned as I frowned. “I don’t think they’re super happy to talk to me, but they still use me.”

“The fuckers,” I grumbled, rolling my eyes.

“That explains why it’s never been you. I’m still the ranch’s lawyer Ryder.” She sat up and leaned back against the wall behind her. She looked good, tired but good. Then my brain kicked in—three hundred and fifty-some days, and this would be over. But it wouldn’t ever be over; we had two kids who relied on us. Even after a year, when we could live separately, we’d still have to be involved with one another.

“I figured as much.We don’t trust people beyond the ones who’ve been on the inside. What would you have done if it had been me that called?” As soon as the question was out of my mouth, I regretted it. I didn’t want to know the answer because it had the power to give me hope or crush me all at the same time.

“Probably would have hung up,” she said lightly.

“That’s why I never called.”

“I would have called you back though.” She looked down at the floor, and I shook my head.

“You wouldn’t have. Night Lex.”

I grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and tossed it haphazardly over myself as I laid down. Sleeping on the couch wasn’t new for me. I fell asleep here at least twice a week, yet I stared at the wood plank ceiling, thinking about last week and how we’d basically just survived.

A squeak from my office door made me look up, and I watched Lexie walk across the room to me. “Thought you might need a pillow.” She held it out, and I took it from her.

“Thanks,” I said, tucking my hand behind my head. Lexie stood by my side, and I itched to reach out to her. If I did, would she walk away? Would she recoil at my attempt? Sure, we’d been a team for the week in Wyoming. But this was home, and we weren’t trying to occupy the kids’ minds. This was going to be our life for at least the next year.

Before I had more time to overthink anything, I held my hand out, and my heart stopped as I waited for her to walk in or away. One second of hesitation passed before she walked to me and laid down beside me. Wrapping Lexie in my arms, I shifted to make more room for her.

“Can I sleep here?”

“I’d like nothing better.” My voice was far more husky than I’d imagined. Lexie shifted and snuggled against my chest, sighing. This was wrong. I should have said no. I didn’t need my old feelings popping up again—not when I’d finally stopped trying to make other women be her. I’d been ready to move on and find the happiness I longed for. But now I had her in my arms again, and it would only hurt worse when I had to let her go again.

“Do you want to talk about getting married?”

“Not really. We can go to the courthouse tomorrow and get the marriage license. Then we can get married immediately or wait until the end of the week.”

“How do you know all this?”

“I was certified to marry people. The only people I planned on marrying were Kipp and Nora, then Griff and Elle asked, but I have all the information in my head now.”

“I can’t believe Griff’s married,” Lexie said, her voice slightly lighter.

“You need to be prepared when you see him again. He’d got some scarring on the side of his face from the fire.” My voice dropped, and my pulse raced. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to think of that night without my heart racing. Lexie moved her hand across my heart, and I held on to her a bit tighter.

“Are they going to be okay with all this?” They were my business partners. Lexie had been brought in like a sister, and it hurt them almost as much as it hurt me when she’d left. It wasn’t just the fact that she’d been a focal point of the ranch, it was also how poorly I’d taken the divorce that would have them worried. They might still deal with her on a business level, but the personal aspect would be gone.

“Probably not, but it’s not their problem.” Shifting slightly, I tucked her head under my chin and closed my eyes, begging for sleep to overtake me. But the clock ticked loudly, as if mocking me. Lexie’s slow breathing was a sure sign she was asleep. I recalled the first time we’d spent the night together, convinced she’d died next to me—until she snored, and I was sure I’d lost five years of my life.

Was the kitchen tap dripping? When did that start? Were those footsteps? Was one of the kids up? I listened, but I must have been imagining things.

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