Page 13 of Rancher's Strength

Chapter Seven

LEXIE

Breakfast was a disaster. I didn’t make anything like Anita did. Taking the kids from their home was hard, just as I had imagined it would be. Ryder had to close and lock the door to his office because Sawyer kept going in there and playing with his computer, causing the cameras to turn off and the alarms to sound.

“Why don’t we go out to the lake?” Ryder said as he pushed his chair away from the table.

“Are Sawyer and I going to have to sleep in the same bed forever?” Ruby asked as she flicked her eggs around her plate, her head resting in her palm.

“No, you aren’t. We got in so late last night, and you needed a bed, and that was it. Change of plans, let’s go to the new house,” Ryder said as he took his plate to the sink.

“New house?” Sawyer asked, his eyes lighting up.

“Well, new to you, not to Auntie Lexie. It’s the house she grew up in.” He leaned against the counter, and both kids seemed to have renewed energy to finish their breakfasts.

“What’s it like, Auntie Lex?” Sawyer asked as he lifted his orange juice, but it slopped on the table because he wasbouncing on his chair. “I’m sorry.” His little eyes filled with tears, and I was up off my chair in a split second.

“Lex,” Ryder said as he tossed me a towel over the kitchen island. His aim was way off, and the towel landed on Ruby’s head.

“Uncle Ryder,” she bemoaned, but then a giggle escaped. Sawyer started laughing too, and when Ryder’s deep, hearty laughter began, I couldn’t be left out. Reaching across the table, I plucked the towel off Ruby’s head and mopped up the spill.

“And that, kiddos, is why Uncle Ryder doesn’t compete in roping events at the rodeo.” Both of the kids almost fell off their chairs laughing, and Ryder moved towards me.

“Pretty sure I roped you once or twice back in the day.” God, this man made my heart flutter. I should really see a doctor about that; it might be life-threatening.

“Only because I let you,” I quipped and stuck my tongue out at him.

“We could try it again.”

“Oh, no, you don’t, not after that less-than-stellar throw. Your days of roping me are over.” Ryder continued to move toward me, and I picked Sawyer up from the chair and held him in front of me. “You have to protect me, Sawyer.”

“I’ll protect you, Auntie,” he said before he held out his hands as if he were guarding me. “Uncle Ryder, you better stop, or you’re going to get it,” he said, and for the first time I noticed his slight lisp when he pronounced words with S. Had Anita been working with anyone on it? Would he be teased when he went to school here? Was I completely overreacting because I'd never noticed it before in all the years I’d known him? Probably.

“And just what am I going to get?” He stopped advancing and waited.

“This.” Sawyer bolted out of my arms, hollering at Ryder, and ran smack into him, bouncing off. Ryder might not have greataim, but his reflexes were spot on as he grabbed the little boy up before he hit the ground. Ruby was laughing, and the boys were play fighting while I stood back watching them all.

This wasn’t supposed to be my life.

There weren’t kids in my future because I couldn’t have them. There definitely wasn’t a man across the room from me who I needed to re-marry. Life was supposed to be quiet, involving work at the law firm, occasional dating, and ultimately being a burden on Lydia as I got older. Not this. Not an instant family, and certainly not the longing for it. But for a brief moment just now, life was perfect.

When the giggles and play fighting stopped, it felt as if someone had let the air out of the room, and we remembered we weren’t supposed to be happy. The moment was over.

“Everyone get in the truck. Let’s go pick out your rooms.” Ryder could sense it. I knew it, and that’s why he wasn’t waiting to go to the farm.

The kids ran out the door, and I slipped on my shoes when Ryder’s hand slid across my back, and I tensed. Our contact up until last night had been minimal. I knew being with him hadn’t been right, and I didn’t want to make him think there was more going on here than just us needing to become parental figures.

“Sorry,” he grumbled as he stepped away from me.

“It’s fine,” I mumbled as I headed out the door. Quickly getting to the truck, I hopped in, wondering if it would have been better to walk. At least I wouldn’t have to ride over there right beside him.

Don’t be silly, Lexie. You spent hours in the vehicle with him yesterday, and everything was fine, I thought to myself. Yeah, but that was before you decided you needed to cuddle on the couch with him last night, the other side of my brain retorted. Why had I done that? I knew it was bad. I knew it would cause problems, but I did it anyway. God, I’m ridiculous.

“Lex, you’re thinking out loud. Stop worrying. I won’t do it again.” I didn’t even notice he’d gotten in the truck, much less that we were pulling out of the yard and heading to the farm.

My dad had always called it the farm because he didn’t have cows, just some farmland that he’d rented out to Kipp’s father years ago. He would have loved to be a farmer, but his law practice had been busy, and then he’d bought that stupid bar, so any free time he had was suddenly gone. Mom had called it a midlife crisis, but I think it was more like empty nest syndrome. He bought it after my sister Lydia, and I became more independent and didn’t rely on him as much. It turned into his baby and my arch-nemesis.

We’d have to work there serving food and singing on occasion. Lydia and I had always sung together. At first, it was in church, and then at the bar. Dad needed to fill in on nights he didn’t have a live band. What polar opposite places to sing: a church and a bar. Eventually, I stopped going to church, but Mom and Dad still went until his diagnosis with dementia.

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