Page 14 of Rancher's Strength

He didn’t want to see anyone because he didn’t want people to pity him. So, Lydia took over the bar, and he became a recluse until Mom couldn’t look after him anymore and admitted him to a care facility.

The one she’d found was nice, and it was close, but I worried about how she’d be able to pay to keep him there long-term. I hadn’t asked her about it because I’d kind of buried my head in the sand about everything and made sure I was busy with work. That hadn’t been fair to my mom and Lydia, but it was the only way I could cope.

Turning into the laneway, we rumbled over the cattle gate Ryder had installed a few years ago, and suddenly, nerves overtook me. My stomach flipped, my hands shook, and I bit the corner of my lip. This was oddly reminiscent of the first time I’d brought Ryder home.

My parents were thrilled the first time they met him, and they were even more excited when he proposed. They absolutely adored him, and I couldn’t blame them; Ryder was charming and sweet. He was also everything I said I never wanted. The last thing I needed was a cowboy, but find one I did. And I might have been a little biased, but I thought he was the best one—he still was.

Our house came into view as we rounded the curve in the road. A large two-story white farmhouse appeared. It had a wraparound porch with green shutters, and the porch swing swayed slowly in the slight breeze.

It still looked like a dream. The apple orchard was a little distance from the house, and I longed to run through the blooming trees, just as I had when I was young and carefree. Mom’s large garden plot was off to the side and appeared to have been tilled recently. In fact, the house seemed to be a brighter white than the last time I had been here.

“Did you have the house painted?” I asked, turning to Ryder.

“Yeah, after your mom moved out, I had someone come in. They did a great job. It was looking a little rundown, and I wanted your mom to see it back in its splendor when she came back to get more of her things.”

“How much did she leave?” I asked, frowning at him.

“Enough that we’ll all have everything we need.” He laughed, and I shook my head. Mom had always had more than she needed, and I was pretty sure that when she moved to Everton, she only took the bare minimum.

“Come on kids, let’s see what we need to bring back with us, besides your things,” Ryder’s chipper voice cut through the silence in the truck, and the kids hopped out.

Walking up the porch steps, the kids ran ahead and went inside, while I stopped and stared at the swing. Ryder and I had our first fight while sitting there; I didn’t even remember whatit was about. But we’d also started making memories on that swing. We used to sneak off to the barn, and I glanced over my shoulder, smiling at the red barn still standing strong across the yard.

Someone had added two chairs and a table between them under the living room window. I couldn’t help but wonder if the guys had been planning to have one of their ranch hands live here. I probably should have felt bad about shifting their plans, but I didn’t. This was my home, and I wanted to raise the kids here.

“You coming in?” his low voice asked from the door. I hadn’t even heard the screen door open—I’d been so lost in thought.

“Yeah.” I smiled and walked past him, careful not to touch him because I wasn’t sure I‘d be able to stay away once I let myself accept his touch in this house.

“Auntie Lex, there’s a room that’s all pink,” Ruby shouted as she was halfway down the stairs.

“Yep, that one was mine.” I smiled and headed for the stairs. It was fun seeing this house through their eyes as they dragged us from room to room. I’d been sure Ruby would want my room, but she chose the one overlooking the orchard. It had a window seat, and I knew that little girl was home the moment I saw her there. She’d found a book in my room, grabbed a pillow off the bed, and ended her exploring, curled up reading.

“Maybe she gets that from you,” Ryder said as he stopped a safe distance from me. Now, I was sorry for the way I reacted to his touch earlier because, at this moment, I should have leaned on him, held his hand, or something. Instead, I wandered into Ruby’s room and sat on the opposite end of the seat.

“Think this one will work for you, your imagination, and your dreams?”

“I think so.” She set down her book, and I noticed the title, Anne of Green Gables. It kind of felt fitting that that’s the book she’d found. “Have you read this one?” she asked quietly.

“I think I read it when I was about your age.” Truthfully, I might have been a bit older, but not by much. It was the first book I truly remember that encouraged imagination and the possibilities that come with it. Although somewhere along the way I’d forgotten how much I wanted to be like Anne, life became hard, and work got in the way. Maybe Ruby and I could discover our inner Anne Shirley together.

Chapter Eight

LEXIE

My body ached from the pain of the past week. We had successfully moved into the farmhouse, and the kids seemed more settled. I hadn’t pushed them about school, but I knew they needed to get enrolled, and there were probably a million other things I was forgetting. My dad would have known. He would have known what to do about all of this.

“Ryder, I need to see my dad.” I didn’t even know where it came from, but if there was one person who could make me stop and sit with this, it was him. Reaching for the frying pan, I dunked it in the water and scrubbed the burned egg off it.

“Are you sure? It’s been a while since you’ve seen him. He’s not the same Lex.” Ryder’s voice was patronizing. Did he not know I wasn’t dumb? I knew my father’s health had been declining, and I wasn’t the bury-my-head-in-the-sand type of person. Avoiding the issue, yes, but I knew the issues.

Slamming the frying pan on the counter, I said, “I need to go. The same or not, I just need to see him.” My chin quivered, and I was fighting tears as I looked at Ryder.

“Okay, I’ll figure out where to take the kids.” He ran his hand over my back quickly before he walked out of the kitchen. Quickly I looked over my shoulder and looked at the kids. Theystared back at me, and I smiled at them. It seemed to be enough for them to go back to their eggs, but an awkward silence was floating through the house.

We dropped the kids off with Julie and Phil. Ryder said they’d fussed over the kids so much and made them feel so welcome that they ran in and didn’t even look back. I couldn’t go in. Seeing all these people from my past right now wasn’t what I needed yet.

Ryder pulled the door open and followed me into the nursing home. I was hit by the nauseating smell of cleaning products and floral air fresheners attempting to mask the reality that some of these individuals required the same care they had as babies. Curiously, there was also the scent of freshly baked bread.