Page 16 of Cursed Fox

"I know it, but I can't help it. I wish you would give Willow Creek more of a chance. I think you would come to like it."

I thought about what Maverick said. It wasn't that I didn't like the small town. In fact, it was great. The people were nice. Maybe a little nosy, but overall nice. The town had its appeal. The problem was the lack of excitement I needed to keep busy. My mind needed to be solving problems, not listening to the latest drama unfold. I was happy my friends were settling in nicely and finding women to spend their lives with, but that wasn't in my future, and I couldn't pretend that it was.

"I didn't say I didn't like it, but we both know it's not what I need."

"It could be. Have you given more thought to talking to someone?"

What was it with everyone wanting me to talk to someone about my night terrors? Couldn't they just understand that there was no help for me. That I didn't deserve any. I was forced to kill an innocent woman so I could protect my country. I deserved to have those dreams as a reminder of what I’d done.

"No, and I don't plan to."

Again with the heavy sigh. I was disappointing my friend left and right throughout this conversation. "One of these days, you're going to realize it's okay to forgive yourself. You don't need to keep torturing yourself over what happened. No one would fault you for getting help."

No, but I would fault myself.

The sound of people moving around the apartment caught my attention. "I have to go." I hung up before Maverick could argue with me further. It would do no good anyway. My mind was made up. I just needed to get through this assignment first.

CHAPTER TEN

Nancy

I wasted extra time in the shower and getting dressed because I wasn't ready to face Lex just yet. I had so many questions I wanted to ask him. But based on the little time we’d spent together, I knew he wasn't going to be forthcoming with answers. I understood it, but it was still frustrating.

When there was nothing left for me to do but hide in my room, I decided it was time to face the music. I headed straight for the living room and was surprised to find the blankets folded nicely and stacked on one end of the couch, the couch and the room empty.

Voices coming from the kitchen caught my attention. I headed that way and stopped dead when I saw Lex and Jimmy working together in silence at the island.

"Good morning . . ."

Jimmy rarely cooked, and for some reason I didn't imagine Lex as the cooking type either. Although, if he lived alone, I would guess he would have to. Unless he had a personal chef like my spoiled son did.

"Morning, Mom. I hope you're in the mood for quiche."

I glanced over to where Lex was indeed plating up breakfast.

"Smells yummy, but since when did you learn to cook breakfast? Or any meal for that matter?"

I wasn't being mean. I loved my son dearly, but no matter how hard I’d tried to teach him, I swear the kid could burn water when he tried to boil it.

"Oh, no, I didn't cook anything. Ms. Roberts likes to make extra meals and leave them in the freezer. Lex did all the work. I just watched and tried to learn."

"And how did that work out?" I smiled at my son.

"I absolutely would've burned it if left to my own devices."

I chuckled at Jimmy's honesty and could've sworn I saw the briefest upturn of Lex's lips, but it was gone so fast, I couldn't be sure.

"Does that mean you know how to cook, Lex?"

I nearly laughed when his nose screwed up like what I asked sounded horrible. "I'm barely two steps above Jimmy. I can follow directions to heat something up, but that's about it."

"Good to know." I laughed.

"Let's eat," Lex said as he carried all three plates over to the small table in the kitchen.

Jimmy grabbed glasses and juice while I got the utensils and we settled in for an uncomfortably silent breakfast.

As usual, Lex didn't speak and I wasn't sure what to say. Jimmy kept glancing back and forth between the two of us like a kid trying to decide which parent’s side to be on. The whole situation felt odd, but I didn't have the first clue how to make it better.