I’m seeing the sky like it used to be seen back on Earth – back before there were skyscrapers and factories. I’m looking at the sky from a time when the heavens were filled with sparkling constellations that celebrated Gods and great beasts, the recognition of their forms limited only by humanity’s imagination.
The twin moons shine a hollow, eerie light across this alien landscape. I breathe in deeply, tasting the verdant greenery. During the day, the planet might be hot and oppressive, laden with moisture – but at night it’s cool and fresh, with a light breeze tantalizing my bare breasts.
I’d originally feared that the night sky might render the same sticky, humid dampness that sticks to your clothes; but instead my nipples harden in the cool wind. My bra had been partially under Stryker’s body, and there was no way I would risk pulling it free and having my escape interrupted. Yet, it feels so strange to be in nature without a shirt, and I shudder as I imagine going back through the portal and finding myself topless, in the streets of New York, in the midst of a chill, near-winter night.
Except that won’t happen. Because none of this is real – and the portal is just some weird, symbolic… destination in your mind.
Or… or I’m in a coma. There’s no way this is real, no matter how real it feels.
I have a choice. I can go back to the cave – back to those three, powerful aliens that have made me feel alive in a way I never have before.
But I know I should think of them as captors.Abductors.
Instead, I’m already feeling like I want to know the thoughts and feelings behind the three alien’s intense green eyes; and the violence in their spirit that they seem to be constantly pressing back.
It’s that – or I can try to go back to my old life. I clench my fist until my nails bite at my palm. My body and mind beg for me to stay, to explore this world, and to believe it’sreal...
I squeeze through the crack the aliens were kind enough to leave me and stand near the summit of the mountain. My feet are steady on the bare, rocky ground. I can already feel a blister starting, but I’ve never felt so free. I’m away from the office, away from the stress of life, away and far away fromeverything.
It’s been less than a day, and yet I feel freerherethan if I’d just spent a week on vacation.
And screw you, Steve from accounting, if you try to deny this vacation expense request!
The thought is so strange it makes me giggle. I’ve got no real resentment towards Steve from accounting, except that he did question my receipts for dinner when I traveled for a law conference with Joshua, who decided that my business expense account meant unlimited margaritas.
I shake my head, and I reallydofeel free. Joshua’s betrayal hit me hard back in New York, but now it feels like I was dragging a ship behind me through ice and waves; and suddenly the towlines snapped. I thought it was so important to bring that ship forward, but in reality, there was nothing inside it but rotten cargo.
A smile blossoms on my face as I understand what’s happening. I trulydidgo mad, and I had a breakdown – but it was all to come to the realization that everything that had happened to me was agoodthing. I’d found out about Joshua before I walked down the aisle with him – the bandaid that was our relationship canfinallybe ripped off.
All the time I was with Joshua, even though my friends said he was a loser, I felt like Ineededhim. Ineededhis love – or hisclaimto love me, which had been revealed to be a big, fat lie.
A big part of it was my breakdowns, and the scars on my legs. I never thought anyone would accept those parts of me, and yet Joshua had; or hadpretendedto.
I hate the idea of any man seeing my thighs and asking the inevitable questions. With Joshua, it was already done. I’d told him about cutting myself as a teenager. The awkwardness of that moment was finished, and it was safe.
I think through this new realization. I might be in a psych ward right now, but that doesn’t mean my law firm has been notified...yet.
Logically, if I wake up now and get back to sanity, I’ll only have missed a day of work. I can come up with some way to convince the other partners that I had a family emergency – that I had to walk out of that partner’s meeting for a vital reason. I know I can do it – after all, having a way with words is part and parcel of my job.
Now all I have to do is get back to the portal – and my sanity. At least those three aliens, real or not, will never see my scars.
I relieve myself, emptying my bladder like I’ve just emptied my insecurities, and after so long of holding it in, the scalding flow feels better than sex.
Well, better than sex with Joshua. I still haven’t experienced what it’s like to be the sole object of desire for three huge, massively-hung beasts…
…and I never will.
That thought gives me a strange feeling of loss, and I secretly long to go back into the safety of the cave. But I know I can’t let myself falter, or I’ll be pulled deeper into this delusion.
I get my bearings, and start to creep down the mountainside, sticking to the shadows. Despiteknowingthis must all be fake – a figment of my fevered imagination – it feels so real that I don’t want to endure the pain of an imaginary animal attacking me. That would be a veryunpleasantway to be shocked back into reality.
My bare foot slips on an uneven rock, and I stumble forward, grazing my knee against the ground. I curse under my breath at the sudden pain – the pain that feels just as real as when I skinned my knees as a kid on the playground.
I force myself back to my feet. Despite the pain, I feel light. Gravity has been turned down on this planet, at least by ten percent or more, and it’s a literal weight off my shoulders.
One thing I’m blessed with, despite my many flaws, is a keen sense of direction. Even though I spent most of the journey being lugged around by those burly aliens, I still know exactly where I need to go. I step carefully, using the moonlight to avoid the rocks and pebbles that will cut my bare feet. Finally, I spot the patch of tall grass the three men ate from. My stomach growls, and I throw caution to the wind – grabbing a handful of the long stems and chewing them.
Instantly, my mouth is filled with refreshing coolness – as if I’m chomping down on a cool, mint-flavored gum. Only, this feels so much morenatural.