Page 24 of Christmas In Love

Nat sighed. “Fiiiiine.”

April beamed. “Awesome. I’m going to go home now before I crash here. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She stood up and waved to Cade. “Thanks for your help!”

Cade’s returning smile probably looked more like a grimace. It felt more like a grimace, too.

The front door jingled, then closed. Cade watched Nat, who studiously ignored his gaze. She stood. “Well, goodnight.”

As she passed, Cade grabbed her wrist. Not hard, just enough to stop her from walking away. She glanced down at his hand, then into his eyes for the briefest moment. He hadn’t realized the only light in the room came from the gas fireplace. It wasn’t very bright at all—casting shadows around the room and warm light across her face.

She was waiting; he needed to say something. “Sorry I played a part in forcing you into a date you don’t want to go on.”

Her shoulders lifted in a shrug, successfully pulling her hand out of his. He almost caught hers again but stopped himself.

“It’s fine, this isn’t about me anyway. It’s about April. She wants that life, you know. The husband, family, and kids. But she keeps dating dirtbags, so I thought finding a guy completely different from her usual would help.”

“And you?”

She looked at him again, and he stood, drawn in by her eyes and the warmth of the fire.

“What about me?” She took a step back when he drew level with her.

“Don’t you want that life? Husband, family… kids?”

For a second, her eyes seemed to search his, looking for something. He would have given her anything she wanted at that moment. She pressed her lips together, and her expression seemed to hold regret, pain… and something else? Cade couldn’t decipher it fast enough before it was gone. She stepped around him.

“I used to,” she said.

Used to? Until when?

He turned in his chair. “But not anymore?”

She bit her lip, opened her mouth, then closed it again. “I’m focused on the B&B right now.”

“Personal and professional lives don’t have to exist exclusively. You can have both.”

Her head twitched like she was about to shake it but changed her mind. Her eyes pierced his. “Do you really think that?”

“Of course.”

“But what if the personal life isn’t what you want it to be?”

What did that even mean? “Then I’d make it what I want.”

She nodded as if she’d expected that. “Well, I can’t right now.” She took a step backward. “I’ve got to get to bed. Night.”

He started to ask another question, but she was already out the door. He could have followed, but something in her voice held a finality and a dose of raw emotion that told Cade she couldn’t continue the conversation.

He stood in the room for a couple more minutes until he heard a door past the kitchen close and lock.

It was fine. He didn’t need to press a conversation she didn’t want to have. Not yet at least.

But as he stood there, his mind refusing to clear the image of her face when he’d asked if she wanted a family of her own, he realized something. That emotion he hadn’t understood was suddenly clear.

Longing. She’d looked at him with a mirror image of the longing that seemed to have taken up residence in his chest.

That knowledge, coupled with a strong desire to not lose this woman again, reaffirmed what he’d decided at the hotel. He would win back Natalie.

At least, he would try his hardest to.

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