Page 33 of Christmas In Love

The air in the car seemed to still.

“What would?” she asked, voice wary.

“You and I. Together. Our kids in the back of the car.” Just saying the words out loud made Cade’s heart thud faster than it had when they’d been unable to find Aiden. Just this last week with Nat had been better than any week in the four years they’d been apart. He didn’t want to lose this chance.

Nat took in a quick breath. He glanced at her; she stared out the windshield with a guarded expression.

Crap.

She didn’t say anything.

Hints of the familiar feelings of inadequacy started filing in. But then remembered how he’d felt with his family and Natalie. The same comments and teasing that would have cut deep before, had simply felt like an indication of his belonging.

The difference was Natalie. Not that she magically erased his negative feelings, but with her, he felt like he belonged. And it was so much easier to fight the negative thoughts when he had someone by his side.

He wasn’t letting this go. It was worth fighting for answers. “I always thought you and I would have pretty cute kids.”

“I don’t really want to talk about that right now,” she said quietly. He glanced over to see her swipe a hand under her eye. His gut clenched.

He pulled the car into park behind the bed and breakfast. Anticipating Nat’s escape, he jumped from the car.

She didn’t bother putting her coat on—just grabbed it and slung her purse over her shoulder then started to walk past him.

He’d made enough dumb moves in the last five minutes; he should have left it at that. But he couldn’t. It was like he’d opened Pandora’s box of questions, and one was burning with particular insistence now.

“Why, Nat? Why’d you leave?”

She stopped but didn’t look at him. “Forget it, Cade. It’s in the past.”

“But it’s not!” The words were louder than he’d meant, but the need to know couldn’t be contained anymore. Four years of wondering had finally broken the dam.

“Yes, it is.” Her quiet words were a stark contrast to his.

“No. Because I want afuture, Nat. With you. I never stopped wanting a future. A wedding, a family, everything.” He couldn’t stop the words once they started.

“I can’t, Cade!” Finally, she looked at him, and the pain that swam behind glossy eyes pushed him back a step. “It’s impossible. I’m sorry—really, I am. We had a great night. I’ve missed you and your family. But please, let’s not bring things up that aren’t worth talking about.”

As abruptly as she’d looked at him, she turned and left. She didn’t run, she walked steadily into the bed and breakfast, but with a finality that made him feel like his heartline had just plateaued. In his ears, he imagined he heard the beep of the machine that signaled to the world someone’s life had just ended.

Except, in this case, Cade had to keep living.

Unfortunately, someone—someone with deep auburn hair, blue eyes that danced in amusement or glared in frustration, and a tenacity of spirit that made him crazy—had just taken his heart with her. How did a person live without that?

Chapter 10

Natalie

“Beth,thanksagain.”Nataliestruggled to keep her voice steady as she glanced over her shoulder. Cade would come through those doors at any moment, and she couldn’t face him again. “Will you email me whatever you need signed for the community service?”

Beth looked surprised but nodded slowly. “Of course. Do you need anything else before I head home?”

“Nope.” Natalie was already inching towards the kitchen. Towards solitude. She paused, forcing herself to think outside her pain. “Beth?”

“Uh-huh?” The girl was pushing books into her backpack and zipping it up.

“Drive safe, okay? Text me when you’re home?” She handed her one of the business cards sitting on the check-in desk.

Beth took it and smiled up at her, straightening and slinging the bag over her shoulder. “Of course.”

---