Page 46 of Coming Home to Hope Street

They married in a registry office, with a lot of Kieran’s friends and a few of hers. Livvy had never told him about her life back in Somerley. She wasn’t sure why, but she didn’t want him to know. Maybe it was the guilt because she’d abandoned her family. Or perhaps it was because even then, she could see the warning signs that Kieran wasn’t good with money.

Yet she loved being married. It was as if she belonged to someone at last, and she couldn’t wait to start a family. They tried for several years until eventually Pip came along. But before they’d had the daughter that bound them together, she’d found out more about why he was so lavish at times. He was hooked on gambling.

At first it had been the horses. He’d always tell her after the event how much he’d won, and treat her to a meal out, or new clothes on a shopping spree. He’d mention that the two-forty-four had been a dead cert, not adding that he’d played dangerously by putting a large amount on the one horse. He was so happy when he won, and Livvy relished those moments.

Because there were more times that he lost, and then he became unbearable. It was always the following race that his luck would change. The next time he’d get the big one. But when he won a few pounds, his guilt would make him spend it on her and Pip, so that she’d stand by him at the ensuing fall.

After the horses came the card games and that was when he started to take her money too. Pip was in school, and Livvy was working full-time in an office when she received the first letter from the bank. Kieran had withdrawn money from the joint account she used to pay the bills. She’d had no idea until all that month’s direct debits had bounced. It had been embarrassing and mortifying to find out what he’d done. They’d had a huge row, ending up in him walking out for two days. Afterwards, they’d sat and discussed everything. He said he’d get help. He said he’d change. He said he’d do it for her and Pip. It was never for himself; he used emotional blackmail to win her over. Because she did love him.

And each time he said he’d change, she took him back because of Pip. Of course she wanted him to be different, but deep down she knew he wouldn’t.

Running out on her the last time had been the final straw. That was when she knew she’d have to be strong whenever he got in touch again.

And now she liked it here in Somerley, but he’d come to spoil it all.

She couldn’t let it start up, but neither could she let Pip down. Because as far as she was concerned, no matter what Kieran did, no matter how many times he left and came back when he probably had nowhere else to go, she couldn’t bear the look on their daughter’s face when she disappointed her. It wasn’t Pip’s fault that her father was a gambler.

But it wasn’t Pip’s fault that her mother was so weak either.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Hannah was surprised to see Livvy on her doorstep. She’d been busy cleaning all morning and had just sat down with a coffee and the morning’s newspaper.

‘Hi,’ she said, delighted to see her, although noticing that something was wrong. ‘Come on in, we have the house to ourselves as Doug is playing golf. You look like you could do with a coffee.’

She hadn’t even got to the kitchen when she heard Livvy sobbing. Rushing back to her, she pulled her into her embrace. She let her cry, not saying anything, just waiting for her to get it all out. But she wondered what had brought this on.

‘Is Pip okay?’ she asked, eventually.

‘Pip’s fine.’ Livvy sniffed but said nothing else.

Hannah raced into the kitchen, pulled out several tissues from a box and went back to Livvy. ‘Let’s sit down.’ She pointed to the settee. ‘What’s wrong?’

‘Kieran’s found me. Pip must have told him our address.’

‘Oh! I wasn’t expecting you to say that.’

‘It was certainly a shock.’

‘How do you feel about seeing him again?’

‘I care about him and I want him to be happy. He says he’s come to see Pip.’

‘Do you still love him?’

‘I’m not even sure I want to be with him again.’

‘Can you tell him that?’

‘He’s only planning on staying for a few days, but I know him of old. This is what he does.’

‘But you can say no.’

‘Like you did, when you said me and Pip could stay?’ Livvy looked up.

‘That was different. I couldn’t see you sleeping on the streets.’

‘And I’m pleased about that. If you hadn’t been home that day when we arrived, I’m not sure what would have happened to us. I only had enough money for two or three nights in a hotel at the most.’

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