Page 49 of DFF: Delicate Freakin' Flower

Then, completely out of nowhere, Eddie tilted his head and asked, voice full of curiosity, “Do you ever worry about poking your finger through the hole in Webb’s gauges while you’re kissing? Or, you know… having sex?”

I turned to him in slow motion, eyes wide. “What the hell, Eddie?” He was already grinning, clearly proud of himself. “Why would you put that in my head? You know what happens when you put shit like that out into the world, right? It makes it happen.”

He laughed so hard he nearly toppled backward onto the grass. “It’s a valid concern!”

“No, it’s not!” I snapped, feeling flustered now and covering my face. “At least, it wasn’t until now.”

“Well, now you’ll be careful,” he wheezed between chuckles.

I stared at him in horror, then snapped, “You are the worst.”

Still laughing, he leaned back on his hands, eyes twinkling as he looked up at the canopy. “Yeah, but I’m memorable.”

I leaned in toward Eddie and hissed, “You’ve ruined it. It’s all ruined now.”

He was still chuckling, breathless from his own joke. “C’mon, don’t be dramatic.”

“I’m serious. I’m going to panic about that every time now. Like, what if I slip? What if I poke the gauge, and he flinches and breaks his nose on my face?”

Eddie let out another laugh snort, clutching his side. “You’re picturing it clearly now, aren’t you?”

I glared at him. “I don't like you.”

That’s when we heard the low crunch of boots through the grass again. Webb stepped into the clearing, looking relaxed and unfairly attractive in a plain black T-shirt and loose joggers. His hair was still damp from his shower, and the sight made me forget my own name for a second.

“What’s got you laughing like a lunatic?” he asked Eddie, his brow raised.

Before I could stop myself, my eyes locked onto the black gauges in his ears, and my mouth betrayed me.

“Me accidentally fingering your holes.”

There was complete silence. Webb just blinked, and then his mouth dropped open, but no sound came out. Eddie rolled onto his back in the grass, howling so loud the birds scattered from the nearby trees. His face turned red, and I saw actual tears slip from the corners of his eyes as he gasped for air.

I, on the other hand, considered digging a shallow grave for myself right there. I had two options: live a brave life in the bayou while suffering endless teasing for the rest of my life, or embrace the chaos and join the trainwreck.

I sighed and gave in—doubling over with laughter until my stomach hurt. Eddie was wheezing like he might never recover, and I was wiping tears from my face when I felt Webb behind me. He dropped down onto the grass and settled behind me, legs bracketing mine, his chest pressed flush to my back. His arms didn’t wrap around me, but his hands rested lightly on his thighs, his presence warm and grounding.

“I leave for five minutes,” he muttered into my ear, “and you’re out here telling people you’re fingering my holes.”

That set Eddie off again. He pointed between us, completely unhelpful. “I like this. This is good. Real couple vibes.”

Webb cleared his throat, probably to suppress a laugh. “All right, focus time. This is not the morning briefing I had in mind.”

Eddie sobered, still grinning but more grounded now. “I hit town this morning. Nobody’s seen the strangers, but I got a few kids hanging around near the edge of town, eyes open for anyone unfamiliar. They’ll text if they spot something.”

Webb nodded, jaw tight. “I don’t like that they’ve gone dark. They could be anywhere.”

“Yeah, they're too quiet,” Eddie agreed. “They’re either waiting for something or looking for a weakness.”

Webb ran a hand through his hair. “Let’s get a drone up. Say we’re nature freaks doing a little eco-watch for the bayou or something. They won’t think twice if we’re casual enough about it.”

I jumped to my feet. “I’ll grab my wig and cap.”

Webb looked up at me. “Put the wig in a bun this time, under the cap. Sunglasses, too.”

“Yes, boss man,” I saluted with mock seriousness, already jogging toward the house.

“Make it tight,” Eddie called after me. “Last time, it looked like you were hiding a family of possums under that thing.”

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