Page 53 of Road Trip

I didn’t know if it was a statement or a question.

“Why the hell should I?” He jutted his chin out, but there was none of the usual fire in his expression. “Zeke’s lease is up soon. He’s probably already moving his shit into my room.”

“At least you have a room in Cape Charles, even if it’s full of Zeke’s shit,” I said. “You don’t have one here!”

Matt narrowed his eyes. “I’ll figure something out.”

He was so fucking stubborn. But so was I, when I needed to be. “Matty, think about it. You’re starting college soon. You can’t just stay here.”

He rolled his eyes. “I was never going to go to community college in Melfa! I wasn’t going to go home!”

“Yeah, I get that now, but you’re still enrolled there, right? You could still go. And you have stuff going on back home that you don’t have here. Like…likeme.”

Matt looked like he was about to argue but couldn’t quite think of what to say, so I took advantage of the silence.

“I could cope with you being here when I thought you’d be happy, you know? Like, if you wanted to live with your dad, who was I to stop you? But knowing you’re here alone? I’ll spend all my time worrying that you’re getting into fights or, I dunno, having your kidneys stolen.”

Matt’s mouth dropped open. “Mykidneys?”

“I don’t know! I’ve never lived on the West Coast. There could be a roaring trade in body parts!”

“Oh my god. You’re an idiot.” Matt rolled his eyes, but I caught the first traces of a smile.

“Maybe, but I’m an idiot who loves you.”

His eyes widened, like maybe those words were shocking, but why would they be? I’d loved Matt for years, and that had never changed. The rest—the kissing, the touching, the flutter in my stomach when I thought of the kissing and touching—that was new, but it was laid over a foundation that had been unshakable for over half my life.

“You’re my best friend. Even before anything else, I love you. And—and now you’re my boyfriend too. I love you both ways now, I guess.” His wide-eyed look scared the shit out of me. “I’m saying it wrong. Am I saying it wrong?”

He opened his mouth and closed it again, like for once in his life he didn’t have a smartass answer.

“Matty.” I closed the space between us, the sketchbook still clutched in my hands, and knelt on the floor beside the bed. “This—I don’t even have words for this drawing. And not because it’s me, but because it’syou. It’s your feelings in this. Please don’t make me leave you here when I love you.” I leaned over and grabbed the sketchbook and flipped it open to the portrait he’d drawn. “And this says you love me too.”

He reached out and took the sketchbook from me, tracing his fingers over the page. “But I can’t just…go back.”

And there it was. Matt hated when people laughed at him or looked down on him. Sometimes they weren’t even doing those things, but he thought they were anyway. Matt didn’t just have a chip on his shoulder. He had a whole potato.

Or maybe that was the wrong sort of chip. My point still stood, though.

I leaned over and shoved his shoulder. “Why not? As far as anyone knows, we went on a road trip and now we’re back. And they’ll be so busy gawking at the fact you snagged yourself a hot boyfriend they won’t care about anything else.”

Matt raised an eyebrow. “Oh, you think you’re hot?”

I gestured to the sketch. “I mean, I look pretty hot there. And you drew it, so you must think so too.”

That got me a reluctant smile. “You’re kinda cute I guess.”

“Come home, Matt. I only just figured out I love you, and I’m not ready to leave you behind when there’s no reason for you to stay.”

He opened his mouth but nothing came out, so he tried again. “You really want me to come home?” he asked, voice small.

“I need you to.” I caught his hands in mine, hating how his fingers shook. “Please.”

Matt’s gaze held mine for a moment before he ducked his head and his dark hair curtained his face. “How come you’re the onlyperson in the world who wants me?” His voice cracked. “My mom barely gives a shit. Even my dad?—”

But however he’d been going to end that bitter sentence, I had no idea, because he wrenched his hands out of mine and covered his face as his shoulders began to shake with sobs.

So I climbed up on the bed with him, put my arms around him, and waited out the storm. Because what the hell else was there to do?

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