Page 130 of Confessions of the Funny Fat Friend

“I’m realizing this might be one of our last chances to talk before you get married next month.”

My heart wobbled at the truth. I was getting married in May and then Bertrand would be married in August, just a couple months from now. All of us kids were grown, out of the nest, even if it was later than most. “It’ll be just you and Mom in the house.”

He nodded. “It just hit me that there’s so much that I haven’t told you about marriage, about life.”

I reached across the middle console, covering his hand with mine. “I’m only a phone call away, Dad. You can call and tell me any time.”

He glanced my way with a somber smile. “But there are some things I want to tell youbeforeyou get married.”

“Sure,” I said. “I think I need all the advice I can get.”

His chuckle rumbled in his chest, and then he sobered. “Mom and I always saved our big arguments for after you kids were asleep, but I don’t want you to think we never had any fights.”

“You were never that coy,” I replied. “Mom would always burn your toast the day after.”

He laughed. “A small price to pay for some of the dumb stuff I’ve done. But you know, I’m thankful for those arguments. Everyone thinks that getting married is supposed to be a happily ever after where you feel only love and never pain, but it’s not.”

My eyebrows drew together. My parents were some of the happiest, most in love people I knew. “What do you mean?”

“Do you remember when Justus tore his ACL playing football? After the surgery, the doctor told him that his left leg would be stronger than his right, even though that was the one that had been injured. Because the strength, the healing, comes in the repair.”

I nodded, understanding what he meant.

“When you and Tyler have arguments, because you will, don’t look at it like a break from the ideal life you want to live. Look at it as a chance to make things stronger than they were before.”

“Of course,” I managed.

“And forget about all that nonsense everyone wants to sell you about marriage being fifty-fifty. People get so caught up in making things equal that they forget marriage isn’t just a contract on a piece of paper. It’s a commitment to serve each other in sickness and in health. Richer and poorer. There will be times Tyler’s too sick to do the dishes.” Dad winked. “That means you’ll have an opportunity to serve him by finishing them up. There will be times when you’ve had a hard day with the kids, if you decide to have children, and he’ll be there to pick up the slack, even if the bedtime routine is usually your task. Don’t get caught up in keeping score, because in a marriage, you’re both on the same team.”

“Oh, Dad...”

He smiled, reaching across the cab to bump my chin with his thumb. “He’s lucky to have you, Hen. Don’t you ever forget that.”

“I promise, I won’t.”

80

Tyler

A bachelor party hardly seemed necessary when I’d been ready to marry Hen a month and a half ago, but here I was, riding around a lazy river outside of Waco with my brothers and Cohen, Jonas, and Steve.

This place was really cool, actually. Some couple had bought property and dug out a massive lazy river and a pond with slides that launched you ten feet in the air before plunging you in the murky water. You could bring your own floats and coolers of beer, and it kind of felt like a high school party with legal alcohol.

After smacking my face and ass in the pond a few times, I decided I much preferred the lazy river where we could float on inner tubes and drink beer at the same time.

Gage said, “Is this your first day off since Hen came back?”

I took a drink, thinking it over. “Actually, yeah...”

“Dang,” Steve said. “Tell your boss to give you a day off more often!”

I laughed. Henrietta and I weren’t the boss of each other. We were a team, equal partners, just like it was always meant to be. “It’s hard work; don’t get me wrong, but it doesn’t feel like work when I’m with her.”

Rhett splashed me with water. “Whipped!”

Cohen and Jonas laughed, and Steve said, “There are advantages to being whipped.”

Rhett just shook his head, drinking his beer. “I’ll take my wet and wild weekends, thank you very much.”

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