I needed to check the floor to make sure my heart hadn’t puddled there. “I’ll tell him you said so.”
Gage gave one of his rare smiles, and it practically made my heart stop in my chest. This time he wasn’t smiling at my child. He was smiling atme.
“Good,” he said.
But it was not good. Because my heart was running all over the place with ideas it shouldn’t be having. Had I really not learned enough from a failed fifteen-year relationship that I’d go gaga over my boss?
And wasn’t I the one judging Caleb and his secretary for hooking up?
I mean, sure, Gage was single, but he was still my boss. And I still needed this job to provide for my family. Even though I worked hard, I knew I wouldn’t make this kind of money anywhere else. It was too much to lose. Too much to risk.
And the fact that I was working myself up over imaginary forbidden scenarios with a man who’d yet to express even a hint of romantic interest in me... I needed to get my head checked.
I excused myself from the conference room, saying I needed to measure something in the sweeping lobby entrance, but really, I just needed space for my brain to clear. It was hard in that room where I could smell his cologne. Watch his muscled forearms move under his rolled sleeves. See the track of his blue eyes over his computer screen. Hear the way he commanded the respect of his employees as he managed a company bigger than anything I’d ever known.
Gage left for a meeting about an hour later, and for the rest of the afternoon, I searched for lighting fixtures for the guest rooms and thought about what kind of furniture I might purchase for my first home, thanks to the generosity of Griffen Industries and the man who ran it.
My head felt a little clearer as I drove to pick up Levi from baseball practice. Until a call from my ex came through the car speaker.
“Hello?” I asked, attempting to keep the ice out of my voice. Some days his betrayal hit me harder than others. And right now, he was at the top of my shit list after missing four of Levi’s games in a row.
“Tell the kids to get excited—the summer trip in Cabo is on!”
My eyebrows raised, and I had to work extra hard to pay attention to the road. “You’re still taking them to Cabo?”
“Of course I am. Why would I change up our family tradition?”
I don’t know, maybe becausewe’re not together anymore?The thought of my kids spending a week in Mexico without me hurt just as much as the idea of being away from them for the first time in months.
“Are you sure you can handle that?” I asked instead. “Three kids is a lot, and you know Cora has been sleeping in bed with me for the last couple months... She might need a lot from you emotionally.”
“They’re my kids too, damn it,” he snapped, all the joy gone from his voice. His mood swing took me off guard, and I bit my tongue to hold back my venom.
“I know they’re your kids too,” I said. “I just wish you would act like it when your son plays baseball on the weekends or when Cora and Andrew want to video chat during the work day.”
“Look, I know I’ve been all mixed up, but I’m turning over a new leaf. I mean it.”
God, I hoped he was telling the truth. “I’d like that... So Cabo?”
“My travel agent already bought the tickets.”
I nodded slowly. “You’re not going to cancel at the last minute? It would break their hearts.”
“I need this vacation too,” he said, wear showing in his tone.
“Okay, I’ll let them know.”
I wouldn’t let them know. Not until I knew for damn sure he was actually going. Fourteen years of parenting had taught me that much at least.
With only a couple minutes left until I arrived at the practice fields, I took a few deep breaths to calm down and braced myself for Levi to be in a bad mood. Being the new guy in school and on the team wasn’t easy, especially moving into town in January when your parents divorced. So I tried not to take it personally.
But when I pulled up to the parking lot by the practice field, Levi jogged my way, a grin on his face, his gym bag bouncing against his side. He pulled the door open and said, “Mom, you’re never going to believe who was at practice today!”
“Who?” I asked.
“The coach for the Dallas Ropers and the shortstop!”
My jaw dropped. “That’s your position!”