Page 39 of Free Fall

“Eat a bag of dicks, big guy.”

I blink up at them. Oddly, inexplicably, I’m transported to a time before Brady’s death interrupted our lives. Cade and Lex joke. Jules and I laugh. Even through all the shit that’s been happening, they can still draw life out of me.

16

Reid keeps his distance from me the rest of the week. Not physically. Never that. He still shows up at my house every morning to make sure I’m dressed and decent for school, and I don’t give him a hard time. He hasn’t once dropped my ass in the shower again or had to pick out my clothes. My parents sit back, drinking coffee with him every morning until I come out of my room. He had a point about making their lives more difficult. I’m not fucking telling him that to his face, but I can admit I’m being a brat. Hell, I feel it in the moment I do it, but I just can’t stop myself.

On Friday, he shows up in a suit and tie. It’s homecoming. There will be a pep rally in the gym during school, a dance tonight, then the big game tomorrow against SHH’s archrivals—the Red Raiders. Actually, they’re just the closest town to us, which in and of itself makes us enemies, I guess. However they got to be our homecoming foes, they’re still going down. Spring Hill has a streak to uphold.

My mom gets misty-eyed when we leave for school. She even makes us stand next to each other so she can take a picture. I stand there awkwardly, and Reid does, too. In this moment, it kind of does feel like she’s replacing Brady with Reid. As soon as she’s done taking the picture, we both step away from one another as quick as we can. The awkwardness doesn’t stop there though. It gathers around us like BO, staying pungent in the air until I want to choke on it. He hasn’t said one word to me in the car during our trips to school other than, “Is this station okay?” or “Are you too cold?” He certainly doesn’t bring up what happened on Monday with me even though things between him and Lex are fine now.

This morning is a different story. We’re about halfway to school when something in the air shifts. He twists in his seat, which usually wouldn’t draw my attention, but I swear I can feel his eyes on me too. It makes my hair stand on end. I’m aware there’s going to be a huge divide, namely Brady’s death, between Reid and I for the rest of forever. I can admit that I was stupid to push my brother’s friends away. Maybe because I was their friend too. Just because they were always classified as “Brady’s friends” didn’t mean I wasn’t always around them or included in everything they did.

I hear Reid half muttering to himself when he finally says, “Briar…” More twisting in his seat like he can’t quite get comfortable. I don’t know if he can’t think of what words he wants to say or if he’s just uncomfortable in general now around me. “I want you to come to the game tomorrow.” He swallows. “Will you?”

I raise my eyebrow at that before I look over at him. He actually asked. He didn’t just show up and demand it of me.

He lets out a breath that erases some of the tension in the car. “I was talking about it with your parents. They don’t know if they’re ready yet, but I’d really like you to be there. We’re going to dedicate the game to Brady, so I thought you might want to see that.”

My stomach drops. “Oh.” I hadn’t quite expected that though I don’t know why. Of course they would want to pay some sort of homage to him.

“Nothing over the top. I promise.”

Considering just Brady’s name makes me sad right now, I can’t imagine what something “over the top” would do.

Now I’m the one squirming in my seat. The shorts I’m wearing feel like they’re riding up my ass even though they come below dress code level, so that’s definitely not it. My skin just feels itchy like we shouldn’t be having this conversation. I close my eyes and count to five. Even though my first reaction is to shy away from this conversation, I know I have to have it and many more just like it because Brady isn’t here, and he isn’t coming back.

I need to get comfortable with the uncomfortable.

“Yeah,” I force out through the closing of my throat. “I’ll come.”

Reid expels a breath from his chest that sounds as if he’s been holding it in for ages. We don’t talk the rest of the way to the school, just that, but already things feel a little lighter between us. When we pull into the parking lot, Jules is there waiting for us. Well, not really for us, she’s actually waiting there for me. I filled her in on everything that went down with Lex and Reid. Well, most everything. I kept some of the sexy stuff to myself, but not all of it. She knows now that Lex and I were having a fling or whatever it was, and she knows Reid flipped his shit over it. She was kind of shocked by everything at first, but she’s pretty sure I have a decision to make. She thinks both Lex and Reid like me. Like, really like me. Not just want to jump my bones, or make sure I’m okay because I’m their dead best friend’s sister.

I can’t even think about any of that right now. As far as I’m aware, Lex is the only one who has feelings like that for me. And despite the fact that he’s told me, he hasn’t acted much differently. I don’t know how long that will last. He’s caring and a sweetheart, so he’ll probably give me all the time I need to figure things out. That sounds just like something Lexington Jones the Third would do.

Unlike Reid Parker.

This whole week has been insanity. I’m reminded of that when a bunch of guys who are completely decked out in our school colors jump all over Reid in the parking lot, growling like warriors. They have a semi mosh pit thing going on until Reid emerges from it, his tie askew and his hair all over the place. He looks over to find me. Jules and I haven’t waited for him, but he watches me with hawk eyes until I’m in the building.

“Still no communication?” Jules asks.

“Not much. Though, he did ask me to go to the football game tomorrow?”

Jules’ eyebrows raise, eyes widening into saucers. “The homecoming game?Thegame?”

“Oh, is that what game it is?” I deadpan. “I wouldn’t know it from all the shit hanging up in the halls.” I tear a streamer down from the ceiling as we walk by and wrap it around Jules like a scarf.

She shakes her head. “No, it’s just—” She stops in the hallway, making me turn toward her. “Usually when a football player asks a girl to come to the homecoming game, it’s a big deal.”

“Ha,” I choke out. The sound more of disbelief than of amusement.

“I’m serious,” Jules says. She holds onto her books more tightly as she stares at me.

“In case you haven’t noticed,” I tell my friend. “Reid’s still dating the bitch supreme of SHH. I saw them kiss the other day.” I did, too, and my gut twisted at the sight. I mean, I usually want to throw up when I see Sasha, but this was different. She laid an ardent kiss on him, and honestly, it was hard to tell if he was kissing her back, or if she was just all over him. They haven’t been talking much. That I know of anyway.

Not that I’ve been paying attention or anything.

“She’s an evil bitch.” Jules says. “How long was that going to last anyway?”

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