Page 40 of Free Fall

I laugh, then we both laugh. The look in my eyes is—I’m sure—screaming about the fact that they’ve been with each other since middle school. That’s a hell of a long time. And weird. Especially for the head jock and cheerleader of the school. Like, they have to be good at everything elseandbe in a long-term relationship with each other? So not fair.

I see Jules’s gaze wander off. She taps her fingers against her books, her frown lines deepening into her forehead. Today’s going to be a hard day for the both of us. And tomorrow. I walk forward and grab her hand. “Well, will you go to the game with me then? If either one of us cry, we won’t have to ask the other why. Or if we don’t talk, it won’t be weird. Or if we just tell stories about Brady the whole time, we—”

“Yes,” Jules says, interrupting every reasoning I could think of to try to get her to go to the big game. “This doesn’t change the fact that Reid Parker asked you to go to his homecoming game though.”

I shrug. I think Jules’s grief have taken over parts of her body. She wants to find happily ever after’s everywhere she looks just like she and Brady had. “You’re off your rocker.”

“I guess we’ll see, won’t we?”

I guess so…

* * *

The pep rallyis an epic disaster.

Not for the football team, the school, or the cheerleaders. Unfortunately, Sasha didn’t trip and ruin her face during one of the routines. It wasn’t that at all. It was just everything combined. Jules and I sat next to one another, squeezing the life out of one another’s hands like we were both about to get shots in the arm and needed the other’s support.

When Reid is asked to say a few words about the game, her fingernails dig into me. He gets the crowd up and on their feet with all the “annihilate the Red Raiders” talk, but at the end, he looks up to the gym ceiling and points to the sky. “This is for you, buddy.” And I swear Reid has the GPS coordinates to wherever I am in the room because his eyes find mine and linger there until he’s swept away into a heap of bro hugs.

The cheerleaders get up and perform another routine before the principal moves back in front of the mic. He talks to us about the behavior that’s expected of us at the game tomorrow and then dismisses the school. It’s a madhouse to get to one of the gym doors right now, so Jules and I stay seated, our hands still wrapped tightly around one another.

Tears have gathered in the corners of Jules’s eyes. “I wonder when this pain will stop.”

“Probably never,” I tell her, saying it optimistically, tacking on a tight smile to the end.

“Yeah, you’re right,” she says. “Not that I want it to,” she quickly adds on. “It’s just, you know, I don’t know how much heartbreak I can take.”

And that’s what I love about Jules. Right there. She knows exactly what I’m feeling, and I don’t even have to say it out loud. I pull her to me and give her a hug. “It’ll fade,” I tell her. “It’ll always rise up, but it won’t always be hovering at the surface.” I use the words Ms. Lyons has been telling me. “Eventually, you’ll find someone again. A prince, probably, because you’re definitely princess material. You’ll move to some exotic country where you’ll rule the land and you’ll only think about Brady on his birthday.”

“Or when I watch football,” she says, sniffling.

“They won’t have football in this magical kingdom.”

She half laughs into my shoulder, tugging me to her for dear life. “Fine. Then every time I see the stars.”

I close my eyes tight together. Jules told me all about her and Brady’s first date, camping out under the stars. “That I can’t do anything about. The stars will always be out, whether we want them to be or not.”

“It’s okay,” she says. “I think I’ll like staring up at them and remembering him no matter where I’m at.” She pulls away from me and wipes at her eyes. Again, she says exactly what I’m thinking. “Now, if only I had a dollar for every time I’ve cried in school this year. I’d be rich enough to be my own princess.”

“I fucking love you,” I tell her.

“I fucking love you too.”

“Hey now,” Cade says, approaching cautiously, but with a shit-eating grin on his face. “If there’s going to be some loving going on between you two, I want in on it.”

The top buttons on his pressed shirt are undone and his tie is stuffed into the back pocket of his nice dress pants. He actually looks like he could’ve just gotten done with a threesome. “Eat dirt, Farmer,” I say, then smile to myself because that actually made sense.Farmer. Dirt. Get it?

He shakes his head at me, then gets serious for a moment. “You two planning on going to the dance tonight?”

I groan inwardly. Last year, I was so excited to go to this dance. I wanted Peter to ask me, and when he didn’t, Lex and Cade danced with me all night just to make up for it. Reid was too busy with Sasha and Jules and Brady were all over one another, so it was just us three.

“I see that look on your face,” Cade says, drilling me with his panty-melting smile. “Don’t act like we didn’t have a great time last year.”

Jules sits up straighter and makes her shoulders go back. “Yes. Yes, we’re going. We’ll meet you guys there tonight.”

“Really?” Cade asks, his eyebrows practically in his hair line. I understand his reaction because I’m looking at Jules the same way. Just, why? Why would we go?

“Definitely,” she says, eyes flaring. She pulls me to my feet and down the bleachers, leaving Cade there with the same look still on his face. She yanks me right out the main doors and to her car. “Okay, we need dresses. Makeup. Shoes. Hair.”

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