Page 17 of Catch Me

I open my mouth to say something, but immediately shut it.

“You were in shock at the hospital. I was trying to get you help. That’s why I went up to the nurse’s station in the first place. When I turned around, you were gone. I tried to tell them you went back there, but they told me you must’ve slipped outside for some fresh air, but they don’t know you like I know you. It started making sense after that. What you asked me on the way to the football game. Whether I would still want to fall for Brady if I knew what was going to happen to him. Once I remembered that, I knew you were going to leave, but you’d already done it. I get it. You were scared. I know you want to get the hell out of here, that all this place does is remind you of Brady. I feel the same way.”

“I’m so sorry I—”

She holds up her hand. “I don’t want your apologies. I have something to say to you.” She swallows. “I didn’t answer you properly when you asked me that question in the car...about whether I would still love Brady. The truth is, I didn’t know what to say at the time. I’m too wrapped up in my own grief sometimes, like you, to know what to do or say. But I have an answer for you now. You asked me whether I’d still choose to be with Brady even knowing what would happen to him, and I’m telling you yes. Wholeheartedly, yes. Some of those moments with Brady were the best of my life.” Tears track down her face. I want to reach over to hug her, but I can tell she needs to get this out. “I can’t imagine not knowing what it means to love. But not just that, not knowing what it means to love Brady. His warm heart. His old soul. I’ll probably love someone else again, but I won’t ever love someone like I loved Brady. Not in depth or emotion, but because we’re all different. I love you, but that’s a different kind of love. I love my parents, but that’s a different kind of love. I wouldn’t want to miss out on any of it. So, I’m sorry, Briar. I didn’t know what to say, which made you want to run away because you were scared. I’m telling you, it’s worth it. It’s worth every second. Even the fights and the angry words because that just makes the other times sweeter. You didn’t have to run away from Reid, Briar. Even if something had happened to him, what little time you did have with him would’ve made all the heartache worth it.”

What did I do to deserve friends like this? I reach out and hug her, holding her shaking body to me. I want to tell her how much that meant to me, but I know I’ll just send us both into crying fits, and I don’t want to do that. “Wow,” I say through fractured vision. “That sounded really wise, Jules.” I squeeze her once more and sit back. “It wasn’t your fault I left though.” I close my eyes, thinking back on seeing Reid in that bed. “I don’t know why I did. I can’t explain it, really. But it wasn’t you.”

She opens up her glove compartment and pulls out a pack of tissues. “I just need you to know that it’s worth it. I don’t want you to be afraid of the relationship you have with Reid. And you shouldn’t live it worrying that it’s all going to get taken away either.”

I nod. “I won’t. I promise. So, you’re not mad at me?”

She wipes her eyes and slices a look my way. “Don’t push your luck. You still made me, and everyone else, worry about you. I just want you to know you don’t have to do it again. The next time you leave Spring Hill should be when we’re all going to college.”

“If I ever catch up from this week,” I say, dreading the amount of work I have in my backpack right now.

“Are you kidding me? You were at the top of the class. You can do it again.” She shoos me out of the car. I hesitate, not wanting to leave her while she’s upset, but she shakes her head. “I’ll be fine, Briar. Just know that if you leave again, we’re going to have real problems. Understand?”

I nod quickly, then get out of the car, pushing the door closed behind me. I climb the front steps and turn to wave at Jules as she backs out of the driveway. Once she’s out of sight, I walk in, yelling out to Dad, “I’m home!”

I hear a muffled reply from inside his office, so I retreat to my room. If Mom was the one here, she probably would’ve been looking at Jules and I from the living room window, timing how long it took for me to get inside. Not that I don’t deserve that because I do.

I tackle my worst subject first, getting it out of the way. There are two Science assignments, which takes me until dinner. My mom popped her head in when she got home from work to make sure I was there. She’s still acting funny, not that I can blame her.

I thoroughly realize I fucked up.

When Dad gets me for dinner, the house smells amazing. I walk out to find that Mom’s made her homemade pizza, my favorite. “Smells delicious,” I say, my mouth already watering.

“We thought you’d like it,” Mom says. She still seems stiff, yet making my favorite meal. Something seems up. Or, it’s going to take her a while to warm up to me again. To gain her trust back, so she doesn’t keep looking at me like I’m going to run out of the house at any moment. I already apologized to them, and honestly, I know that’s not what they need. They just need me not to do it again.

When we settle down to eat, I try light conversation. I don’t look at Brady’s empty seat like I usually do. Instead, I tell them I caught up all of my Science work and will be starting on History after dinner.

The pizza is so delicious that I almost miss the look that transpires between my parents. It makes my stomach bottom out. My dad wipes his face with his napkin and sets it down. “Your mom and I have been talking about something.”

“Okay…”

“We,” he says, clearing his throat like he doesn’t want to say we at all, but has to. My mom reaches over to grab his hand. “We think it’s best if you actually did go stay at Grandma and Grandpa’s. Until the end of the year.”

My mouth drops. My mind tries to make connections on why they would be saying this, but instead, there’s nothing but a hazy fog. “What?”

“We talked to the school closest to their house today. There’s no problem there. They’ll let you in, and you can start on Wednesday.”

“But Grandma and Grandpa live in another state.”

Dad opens his mouth to say something, but Mom cuts in. “We think it would be good for you to get some distance from here. That’s what you’ve been trying to tell us, anyway. By running away.”

“Maybe it would be better for you if you were in a school that didn’t remind you of Brady every day,” my dad finally says.

“But I have friends here.”

“Friends that you run away from.”

“That’s not fair.”

“That’snot fair?”

My dad squeezes her hand, and my mom cuts herself off. I look at both of them, but I can hardly believe these two are my parents right now. “You want to send me away?”

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