Page 33 of Catch Me

A small laugh trickles out of her, which turns into a huge laugh. It keeps coming out of her like she’s had it held in for a while. She wipes tears away from her eyes, and I totally get it. Emotions are fucked up. Sad one moment, happy the next. You can be crying when you’re sad and crying when you’re happy. One thing leads to another and you may have started out happy, but ended up sad.

I reach over and pat her arm. “I’m sure Brady handled this much better.”

Mom laughs again. “Actually, I think he was way more embarrassed than you.”

I take that memory my mom’s reliving in her mind and let it go, giving her this moment. Maybe some other day I’ll ask her how it went when she found out Brady was having sex with Jules, but not right now. Right now, I’m going to let her have it to herself.

I lean back in the seat, closing my eyes for a moment, pushing aside thoughts on what Brady might think of Reid and I having sex and just hold on to the tiny paper bag in my hand that’s just more evidence of how my world is changing without Brady in it.

When Mom and I pull in and go into the house, Reid’s already there. I can tell from the look on his face that my dad probably already had a talk with him. I cringe inwardly, but I’m also relieved I didn’t have to be there for that one. We eat dinner together, and then Reid and I retreat to my room to do homework, which my mom—again—says to keep the door open. We do, but that doesn’t mean we don’t sneak kisses. And that also doesn’t mean I can’t avoid the questions from earlier that I know Reid was burning to ask.

I’m lying on my stomach, a book open in front of me. Reid has my desk chair pulled to the side of the bed. He’s hunched over his own book, but he’s too busy dragging his fingers up and down my side to pay attention to what he’s reading. Well, at least, I’m too preoccupied with what he’s doing that I’ve had to read the same page five times because it hasn’t sunk in once. “You know,” he says, his voice low. When he pitches it like that, it does twisty things to my insides. “You can’t avoid my questions forever. Even if your dad did try to talk to me about sex.”

I look up, eyes round, but then I laugh into the comforter, using the thick fabric to stifle the sound. “How’d that go, by the way?”

“We’ll talk about you making it up to me later.” His eyes glint with amusement, but his face turns serious soon afterward. “I know something happened today, Briar. Lex tells me you and Oscar were working together in the library. Is it about him? Did he say something to you?”

“He says a lot of things,” I confess, rolling my eyes. “That boy really loves to hear himself talk.”

“Stop avoiding the question.”

I turn over on my stomach, looking up at him. He moves around and leans over the bed. I prop myself up, so we’re staring at each other face-to-face. “He knows we want to get back at Sasha.”

His jaw tightens. “Did he threaten you?”

I shake my head. “He seems almost like he wants to help,” I say, grudgingly.

“Oscar Drego is not our friend.”

“I agree,” I tell him. “One-hundred percent.”

Reid relaxes a little. “So, that’s it?”

I tuck my bottom lip between my teeth. I don’t know how to bring Lex up without pissing Reid off. Reid’s jealous, and I’m not even sure he’ll even give Lex a break.

“You can tell me,” Reid says. His hand reaches out to trace the line of my jaw.

I swallow. “It’s Lex,” I say finally. “Oscar told me I needed to cut him loose. That he can tell how much Lex…likes me,” I say, my tongue feeling too large for my mouth as I stumble over the word like. That wasn’t exactly what Oscar said, but I’m not going to use the L word. “He made it seem like I was being mean to him, but I don’t—.”

Reid sighs. He gets up from the chair and starts to pace the room. His fingers dive into his hair until it looks like he’s going to tear it out by the roots. I sit up, forcing my legs over the bed to watch him. “It’s not you,” Reid says. “Oscar’s wrong about that. It’s not you at all. I was kind of hoping he’d get over it after he saw you and I together, but it doesn’t seem to be working that way. He’s been pissing me off lately. Always watching you, using excuses to touch you.”

“Reid,” I say. When he looks over at me, I don’t know what to say. I don’t want them to fight. I can’t stand the tension that’s filling the room right now. For as long as I’ve known these guys, it’s always been the four of them. Now, after Brady’s death, it’s only three. Something else can’t happen to these guys. Not fighting over me. That’s so…dumb.

“I think I’m going to have a talk with him again.”

“Is that really necessary?” I ask, biting my lip.

“Briar, nothing’s going to change the way I feel about Lex, but Oscar’s right. It’s not fair to him if we don’t shut this shit down.”

“Does that mean I should talk to him?”

A growl escapes Reid lips, but then he looks guilty. “If I was a better man, I’d probably just let him have you. He’s better than me.”

“Don’t say that,” I say, standing. “This is just a fucked up situation that I started. If I hadn’t—” I cut myself off when Reid throws a look at me. “If I hadn’t done what I did, maybe Lex wouldn’t, you know, like me like he does.”

Reid shakes his head. “It’s not that. Lex can separate sex and feelings, trust me. It’s just you, Briar.”

I hold my head in my hands. Reid comes over, leans down to kiss me on the top of the head, and then packs up his book bag. “Leaving?”

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