Page 66 of Those Heartless Boys

He takes a while to answer, his blue eyes darting to different areas of my face before he says, “I’m not sure yet.”

As soon as the last word leaves his mouth, he moves forward. He claims my lips, pressing into them with a hunger that takes me off guard. He doesn’t ravish me. He doesn’t kiss me until we’re breathless for more. He just leaves his lips on mine in a transfer between two souls, who in that moment, are connected outside of reality.

As quick as it started, he pulls away. He reaches for the handle, opening the door and marching away. He leaves me there, my mind in a merry-go-round of emotions. I stay leaning against the door until Lucas comes looking for me. He puts his arm around my shoulders and leads me from the room. He doesn’t say anything, but I already know. They tell each other everything.

I told myself I had to go to the computer lab to finally work on that English paper I lost when my laptop was stolen, but after everything that’s happened, I find myself being led to the silver Audi in the parking lot where Wyatt is nowhere to be seen. It’s just Stone, sitting in the driver’s seat with sunglasses on. They unnerve me because I can’t see anything he’s thinking. When he sees me get close, he just looks out the front windshield, one hand on the wheel and the other on the gear clutch, waiting.

Lucas pulls the passenger side door open for me, but I shake my head. “I’ll sit in the back.”

No one speaks on the way back to Jacobs Manor. No one explains where Wyatt went even though we all left this morning in the same car, so I have no idea how he’s even going to get home. When they pull into the driveway, I get out first, slinking to my room. I’m not in the mood to be around anyone tonight. At least for a little while. Besides, it’s better off that I’m not. I have to make a decision about this contract.

When I hole myself in my room, Lucas knocks on the door, but I don’t answer him. He’s such a gentleman that he doesn’t even force his way in. He knows I need my space right now. Because of the contract and because of what Wyatt said to me.

I spend too much time staring at the ceiling, sifting through my childhood memories to see if what Wyatt said has any merit. Then, I decide that I’m the only one who gets to decide what happened to me. He can’t talk me into having daddy issues. Why would anyone want to do that?

On the other hand, some of his comments make sense. Dad never asked me my sizes. I thought it was because we both didn’t know. But he could’ve taken me to the stores to figure it out just like we did yesterday. Like Wyatt said, it’s highly unlikely there was never any clothing my size, even in the second-hand shops.

But he’s a guy, right? What would he care about styles and sizes and—

I scream into my pillow, punching the bed. My dad is the only person I have. He’s been my only person. I can’t just sit here and think poorly of him. I’m trying to find him for Christ’s sake. I need to. As soon as I do, this will all blow away. They’ll see what kind of father he really is.

Even though I’ve practically memorized the contract, I read through it again, trying to think of different ways it can be interpreted, but it actually can’t. It’s ironclad, just like Stone Jacobs said it would be. He’s offering me a lifeline here. I’m more of a fairy tale girl, so I’d rather something like this be signed in blood, but I guess black ink will do. When we sign this, we’ll be bonded in more ways than one.

After a couple of hours, I leave my room to find Lucas and Stone outside by the pool. They’ve ordered subs which are still wrapped on the patio table. Lucas is doing laps in the pool, but as soon as he sees me emerge, he pulls himself out in all of his bare-chested glory. I try not to stare. If I’m going to be working with these guys for the duration of this contract, then I have to get used to being around them like this. Plus, I have a feeling I can see Lucas shirtless any time I want now, and that gives me a tremendous shot of adrenaline.

He pulls a towel off a patio chair and starts wiping his chest down with it. A crease forms in his brow as he watches me, and I almost feel sorry for shutting him out. Being around people is something I have to get used to. I’m not used to having anyone around. Going to college and living in the dorms was a major adjustment. I’ve been doing nothing but navigating different waters since I matriculated into Saint Clary’s, but now there’s Wyatt, Stone, and Lucas, too.

“We got subs,” Stone offers, sliding his sunglasses off and setting them on the table. He eyes the contract in my hand, but he doesn’t say anything. It feels like we’re miles away from where we were yesterday when he had his hands on me. “We didn’t know what you liked, so we bought a bit of everything.”

It definitely looks like they bought a tray big enough for a huge party. I’ve had lunch meat before, but I’ve never had them on sub rolls. Just plain old white bread for me and Dad, and lots of times, we didn’t even have mayonnaise or anything like that to put on it. I suppose by Wyatt’s standards, that means I was neglected.

I’m itching to ask where he is, but I can’t quite bring myself to do it. I shouldn’t want to know. In fact, I’m a little terrified at seeing him next because I don’t want to get in a fight again, I certainly don’t want him to keep pushing me.

“What do you suggest?” I ask Stone.

He almost reels back. Almost. He catches himself so he only looks slightly flummoxed. Still, I take pride in knowing I’ve surprised him again. He picks up one of the sandwiches and hands it to me. “This is what I like. Do you want to try it?”

I nod, peeling the wrapper down. I don’t even check what’s in the sandwich before biting down. I figure I’d rather not know in case the looks of it deters me from eating. I chew, and at first, it’s really good. I smile and give Stone a thumbs up but in the next moment, I chomp down on something hot. As fuck. My eyes widen, and I start to choke. I can’t help but spit out the taste that’s in my mouth and even then, my tongue is on fucking fire.

Stone chuckles in front of me. I want to hurl his dumb sandwich at him, but I keep coughing. Lucas hurries over to the outdoor sink, pouring me a drink of water and then bringing it over so I can down it. When I finally regain my composure, I ask, “What in the hell was that?”

Stone takes the sub from me, chuckling. “They’re called peppers.”

“Dear God. They’re fucking awful.”

He hands me another sub, telling me it’s tamer, and then laughs as he takes a huge bite out of the sub I gave back to him.

I grumble at him, this time opening up the sub he gave me to see what’s in it, so I don’t have a repeat of what just happened. Instead, I’m happy to see that there’s ham, cheese, lettuce, and mayonnaise on this one. Plain Jane. I guess that’s the way I like it.

“You could’ve started her out with a little less heat,” Lucas says, rolling his eyes as he sits next to me.

I hungrily eat the sub in my hands. One, because it tastes good, but two, because it helps tame the fire that’s still raging inside my mouth.

“I’ll keep that in mind for next time,” Stone says. “I forget that she hasn’t...” He trails off, peeking at me like he doesn’t want to say the wrong thing which is a brand new look for him. Usually, he doesn’t give a fuck. “...you know, tried stuff before,” he says, all politically correct as if he hasn’t been the biggest douche to me before.

Stone’s phone rings, and he brings it out. He frowns down at it then stands, shoving the chair back. “Fuck,” he roars.

Lucas’s hands flex on the glass table. “What?”

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