Page 52 of Finn

Panic claws up my throat. “Did you take away his phone?”

“No, but I told him it might be best if you didn’t talk for a little while.”

I just stand there, staring at him. The longer I do, the more disappointment seeps in. For one second earlier, I thought maybe showing him my vulnerable side would’ve prevented anything like this from happening, but it didn’t. All it did was make him act out in the opposite way I wanted. “You’re a dick,” I say simply. I shoulder past him and leave the room. He doesn’t even attempt to come after me and smooth things over. And he should probably count himself lucky on that front because as soon as we’re alone, he’s going to hear everything I fucking think about this.

I slam the door to my new apartment, breathing through my nose. Immediately, I move toward my phone. I sent Finn three unanswered messages already, but it’s time for another one.

I don’t think. I just start typing.I’m so sorry. I didn’t know he was going to do this. Don’t hate me. When you get back, I’ll be here.

I stare at the screen for a few minutes. When I don’t get an immediate response, I slam the phone down on the coffee table and throw myself backward on the couch, letting real tears slip out. Not the frustrated ones, but the grief-stricken ones. They’re not just for Finn either. They’re for my brother who feels as if he has to take this giant leap. They’re because even though I want to hate him, I can’t.

After a good, long cry, I head into the kitchen and find some ice cream in the freezer. I decide to wallow in some sugary goodness, imagining what Jax would say to me if he knew I was eating this shit.

Then, I remember that I have both the brothers’ phone numbers in my cell. I pick my phone up again, still eating the chocolate chip cookie dough smothered in chocolate sauce and send Jax a message.Is he okay?

I don’t even know if he’ll answer me. He’s not my biggest fan by any means, but if Finn is correct, I did start to grow on him.

His two-word reply is at least something to tide me over.He’s fine.

I roll my eyes.He’s always so chatty, I snark to myself.

Unbelievably, he writes back again without me having to prompt.I don’t know where he is. He won’t say.

Thank you, I reply. And I mean it. If he was anyone else, I probably would’ve added some hug emojis to let him know I’m actually so thankful I could squeeze him, but for some reason, Jax doesn’t seem like the type to want my sentiment reinforced with an emoji.

However, to shock me even further, he texts back.Are you okay?

I’m good. Pissed, but good.

The texts stop, but even then, they make me feel better. I can dry my tears and finish my ice cream without feeling like there’s a missing piece of myself. At least he’s good.

Later that night, Cole comes into my room. He must have a key for the locked main door, but he knocks lightly before entering the bedroom, rousing me from sleep. He sits on the edge of the mattress. “I know you’re pissed, and I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be. I just wanted to let you know the threat’s been eliminated, Leenie. I love you.”

I reach out, moving my fingers over his. In the dark, I nearly miss him, and it seems like it’s a physical manifestation of our relationship right now. We keep missing each other. We keep not understanding one another. But even with all that, he’s still my brother. “Thank you,” I tell him. “Love you too.”

He nods back and leaves. In the dim light, I don’t get to study him except it looks as if he just got back from going out. He’s wearing his signature jeans and a white shirt, and as he passes through the doorway, I’m almost positive I spot blood splatter, but I don’t ask. He’s obviously fine. He was calm and contrite even. Those emotions are so rare for him that I take it as a good sign.

Since he woke me up, I pick up my phone that’s charging on the nightstand and frown when I don’t have any messages. Tomorrow, though, is a different story. Maybe I can go back to work. Maybe Finn will return. If the two brothers will let me, maybe I can just stay and help them at the shop. I don’t know if I can go back to working at the boring bank now. I’ll miss the ever-present volatility of people hitting things and the shouts of encouragement. Hell, even the fighters were growing on me, some of them making sure to stop by and say hi while I was at the counter.

Of course, that all hinges on whether Finn is willing to put up with who I am, and the possibility of being dragged into Dragon business while simultaneously putting his own businesses and his brother in jeopardy. I still can’t believe my brother pulled him out of the Heights with no explanation other than because he knew we’d slept together. He can state safety reasons all he wants, but I think it’s a little more than that. He’s still struggling with wanting a better life for me, and if I get with Finn, he probably realizes I’ll never leave the Heights.

Those are a lot of pills to swallow, and honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if Finn decides I’m not what he wants. He has everything going for him. If we were playing the Heights Bachelor, he’d be the clear winner.

I swallow the hard lump of acceptance that works its way up my throat. Right now, I could use some of his positivity because I’m pretty sure I’m about to lose him. And that breaks my heart.

22

My brother and I have a near wordless breakfast together before I leave the tower. He won’t answer questions as to where Finn is. Apparently, whatever Finn’s doing is wrapped up in the business my brother went away for. The only thing Cole promises is that the sexy trainer is not in any danger.

It’s the least he can offer me.

He’s hesitant to let me head back to my normal apartment, but now that the threat is gone, he doesn’t really have a say. Sure, there might come a time where there’s another one hanging over my head. Or one might pop up when we least expect it, but I’ve gotten it across to him that I still need to live my life no matter who he is. I can be careful while still doing that. I always have been. I had to live that way while he was joining up with the Dragons because I wasn’t sure if the Crew were going to retaliate against the family he left behind.

I’ve been watching my back for years. He just wasn’t here for that part.

Jaz must hear me walking up the stairs because she throws the door open as soon as I hit the top and gathers me in a hug. My girl’s been there for me, listening to me cry over the phone when Cole sent Finn away. Neither one of us thinks it’s permanent but it’s still a big deal. In fact, this was the first time my level-headed friend said anything bad about my brother since he’s been back, so that’s saying something. “I made cookies,” she cries into my neck.

I laugh, patting her back, dropping my meager tote bags filled with sexy shit that I didn’t even get to use just inside the door. “My favorite?”

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