Page 26 of Untamed

Walking next to Jonah—my mate—on the way back to Greystone fills me with warring emotions. Nature begs me to be this close to him all the time, but there’s still that little part of me that’s blaring a warning not to let him in.

This slight step forward is nothing in the grand scheme of things. However, plants don’t grow in a day either. It takes a lot of different factors and processes, and the same happens with shifters, too. Well, shifters of the rejected variety. The only thing I can do is hope that we keep taking steps and eventually find ourselves where we always belonged.

12

Ilied when I said I didn’t know if Jonah was a badass.

We’re supposed to be stronger and healthier in packs but that doesn’t mean there isn’t infighting or arguments. I witnessed a fight between Jonah and another wolf once. I don’t remember what it was about, but Jonah kicked his ass in spectacular fashion. It was jaw-dropping, awe-inspiring, panty-melting goodness.

So, I’m not surprised that when we get approval from Ms. Ebon to use the gymnasium and lug all of his equipment from his truck to the gym that he blows me away with his agility and skills. He doesn’t even change into more comfortable clothes to do it either. Standing there in the black polo and jeans, he goes through what he calls a short warm-up. I have to watch that I don’t get caught gawking or drooling at his fine ass.

We didn’t realize until too late that the only thing I had to wear was my academy outfit. That didn’t mean I got out of the workout, he just promised to bring me appropriate clothes next time. Today, I’m stretching as he goes through some calisthenics.

Thankfully, when I unroll the skirt to its full length, I’m not showing off my goods while I stretch. Then again, the way I keep watching him, I’m wondering if I should roll it twice like Mia suggested.

I clear my throat. “So, I hear you emailed Ms. Ebon about my transgression the other day. Thank you.”

He stumbles, something I wouldn’t have noticed if I weren’t watching him like a hawk. “It wasn’t your fault. It was pure wolf instinct.”

I’m going to regret what I say next, but I do it anyway. “Still, administration was two seconds from kicking me out. They thought I was with another wolf.”

He stops mid jumping jack, and a growl rips from his chest. It’s so feral that it makes the tips of my toes tingle and arousal pool in my lower belly.

“Of course that would mean—”

“I know what it means,” he snaps, shoulders bunching. His skin starts to ripple as he loses control, and it makes me smile. “What are you smiling for?”

I nod toward the fur sprouting over his arms. “You don’t like the idea of me being with someone else.”

He grinds his teeth together, closes his eyes, and gets himself under control. A few moments later, it’s as if his outburst never happened. “Of course my wolf doesn’t like the idea of it.”

Hmm.My wolf.That sounds like a cop-out, but I don’t push him on it. I’m trying to be...nice. Normal, even. If that’s such a thing.

When silence stretches between us, my anxiety kicks in. All of Ms. Ebon’s notes are swimming in my head, so I ask the first thing that comes to mind to get to know him better. “So, do you like the idea of going into security for the alpha?”

Jonah turns toward me, the areas around his eyes tightening. A glean of sweat shines across his forehead from his exertion.

When he doesn’t respond for a long time, I start babbling. “You don’t have to answer. I was merely curious.”

He shakes his head. “It’s not that. I don’t think anyone’s ever asked me that question. But yes, it’s an important part of our pack life, and I’ll be honored to do it.”

Well, that sounded like a super political answer. “I bet it makes the sacrifice worth it since our future alpha is one of your good friends.” My voice comes out hard and strained. I don’t mean it to, but I never got along with the three big wolves at school. Our alpha, beta, and Jonah were the kings. They never participated outright in the name-calling and shaming, but they never stopped it either. Something the alpha’s son could’ve easily done. He wouldn’t have since his aunt was one of my mother’s accusers, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be bitter about it.

Before I can stop myself, I say, “I bet they pity you.” His head snaps up, but I’ve already committed, so I keep going. “When you found out I was your fated one, I bet Jesse and his family pitied you.”

The striking emerald in his eyes fades. He doesn’t need to confirm it for me because my thoughts weren’t exactly suspicions. I’ve watched my pack enough to know that some wolves are pitied when their mate is revealed. For me to be bonded with someone like Jonah, I’m considered lucky. It’s a definite rise in the pack. But I guess what no one ever thinks about is the other side. It’s not as if I somehow finagled fate to choose me for Jonah. I didn’t ask for it, so I certainly shouldn’t be ridiculed for it either. I’m sure they’re all having a field day back home. They probably had a mourning party for Jonah.

He rubs his chest again. I try to temper my emotions, but when I can’t, I groan. “Let’s just get started.” I stand, ready to do anything other than feel sorry for myself and have Jonah read me through the bond. “Remember that I’m wearing a skirt, and I’ll try my best.”

He huffs. “It’s not like I haven’t seen you before.”

His gruff voice sends a blaze of heat up my spine. “Yeah, well, none of those times worked out well for me, so I’m hoping we don’t have a repeat.”

I avoid his gaze. Whatever he feels about what I just said should be none of my business. I don’t want to see hurt in his eyes for fear I’ll feel bad, and I definitely don’t want to see relief that we’re on the same page either.

Seconds tick by, and I chance a glance at him. He’s still stretching, so I mirror his movements. Eventually, he says, “My parents take our work for the pack very seriously. That’s why I wanted you to have a sense of what we do. Obviously, I wouldn’t expect—” He pauses, pressing his lips together. “You know if this works out— Fuck,” he spits, shaking his head. “I wouldn’t expect you to have to participate if you didn’t want to. Not everyone is cut out for it. That’s all.”

That’s one of the first times I’ve seen him conflicted. “And you’re wondering if I am?”

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