Page 16 of Forsaken

I wish I lived in her world where it’s all sunshine, rainbows, and positive outlook. Literally the worst thing that’s happened to her is being sent here. Admittedly, that is a pretty shitty thing, so I’m not knocking her on it. If I could carry her positivity around with me wherever I go, I’d be set for life. “Fingers crossed,” I tell her. It’s an odd thing to aspire to. Aside from the Nathan stuff, my heart keeps holding on to the betrayal and the abandonment. I have to find a way to let all of that go before I walk back onto Daybreak soil or this trip is doomed. “Any news on your front?”

“I think we’re getting somewhere,” she says, cheeks blushing again.

I try to read between the lines, but the problem with talking to a positive person is that I’m never entirely sure whether she’s just looking at the world through rose-colored glasses or if what she’s saying is actually happening. “I hope so,” I tell her, reaching out to pat her hand. “You deserve it, girl.”

If she had to stay here the same length of time I had, she’d be a freaking mess right now. Greystone Academy isn’t for people like her. She’s too damn good.

Nadia smiles at me and then peers over my head. She chuckles. “Nathan doesn’t know it’s you.”

As if on cue, he sidles up to the table, his bored face on full display. He never gives me that look. It’s reserved for other people and conversations he doesn’t give a fuck about. When he sees me, he does a double take. “Jesus, Mia.”

My mind short circuits. It’s the same damn thing he said to me when he was still between my legs, my juices still glistening on his full lips.

Oh for fuck’s sake. I need to get my head out of the gutter.

I cross my legs, trying to stop the furnace from starting before it gets blazing down there. “You like?”

As I wait for him to answer, I dissect the way I asked him that question. Did I say it in a friend way? Or in the girl-who-has-a-crush-on-a-guy kind of way?

This is going to be awful. Here I am, thirteen fucking days away from going Feral, and I’m obsessing over something that could send me there quicker. Especially in Rejected Mate Academy.

My skin blazes from my thoughts, and I peer up at Nathan for his reaction. “You look like the old you.”

“You’ve had your hair like this before?” Nadia asks.

“Not exactly like this,” I say.

“She used to do it to piss her mom off.” Nathan chuckles as he finds his seat and turns his attention to me. “Have you sent a picture to her yet?”

I shake my head. “I thought I’d leave it as a surprise.”

“I hope I’m there for that one.”

Nadia pouts again, and I try to steer the conversation away from the fact that we’ll be leaving her here for a couple of weeks.

I’m dying to tell Nathan what the hairdresser told me. We’ve talked about the subject of how to live Feral at length. Not at first, but as the months went by, it became a real possibility that deserved attention. We assumed that we would both be going at the same time. Now that my ass is on the line first, I’m starting to freak out a little.

I saw Kinsey’s face after she watched the Feral video for the first time, and believe me, those images are fresh in my mind, too. Being in a pack has been drilled into our brains since we were pups. There’s no chance of survival otherwise. That’s why we have the pack system. That’s why there are mate laws. Shifters breed other shifters to make sure we have a nice, healthy pack.

Nathan hits his shoulder against mine. “Hey, you okay?” He doesn’t share my all-consuming fear of going Feral. Nathan is a firm believer that he could last on his own for a little while, even though conventional wisdom suggests otherwise.

I glance up from the volcano of mashed potatoes that I’ve been building. Nadia is staring at me with a frown, too, so I must’ve been out of it for a little while. “Good,” I tell him.

He starts his gaze at the crown of my head. My purple and black hair shifts in front of my face as I move. Suddenly, I’m all too aware of the makeup I have on. It’s a little heavier than normal. It’s not as if I dress to impress here at Greystone. I usually only put it on when Sean is coming in for a session. Theoretically, he’s the only one I should want to impress.

My mind snags on the thought that’s been bothering me: Why was oral so amazing with Nathan when he’s not my fated one? If Sean and Gayle are going behind our backs, this could be one of the reasons why. They had feelings for each other before fate decided to pair them with someone else. I’m not immune to their original position in all of this, but I am calling bullshit since nature is telling them to do something else. It’s undeniable. I’ve felt those feelings with Sean. They’re there. He can’t refuse to feel them.

That’s why uncertainty over what I did with Nathan is digging into me tightly. It felt good—amazing, actually—but it shouldn’t have.

I peer outside to stop myself from staring at Nathan. The surrounding glass walls and ceilings let in the natural light, reminding me of a fancier version of Kinsey’s greenhouse. This is one of my favorite places in the whole gothic building. Especially when they serve chocolate pudding.

Heels click against the tile, echoing around the huge cafeteria. The hairs on the back of my neck rise when the clicking stops next to me. They used to stop here for Kinsey, so I’m not surprised when I spot Ms. Ebon at the edge of our table. “Miss Adams, Mr. Greene, I’m here to inform you that a car will be waiting for you two tomorrow morning at 9:00 a.m. sharp to return you to Daybreak Pack for the Winter Solstice. You’ll return here in ten days.”

Her presence usually silences the room, and today is no different. I clear my throat, realizing we’re the center of attention. If the whole academy didn’t know already that Daybreak was leaving, they do now. “Thank you, Ms. Ebon. We’ll be ready.”

Whispers rise up as soon as she moves on to the next table where more students are sitting with purple and yellow. A few people close by groan, wondering how come they’re not allowed to return home. I feel like telling them all to shut the hell up. I’m the only one with a fuse tied to me, counting down the days.

After that, I’m not particularly hungry. I go through the motions of someone who’s about to miss ten days of classes and stop by my professor’s offices to see how I can keep on top of things. Each of them is surprised to see me. No doubt, they know about the timeline. Some of them tell me not to bother, even though I insist. Nathan is right. It’s time to fight, and I’m going to do just that.

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