Page 84 of More Than Pen Pals

Three hours later, we have the makings of a proposal in place for Diego Sanchez and Bobby Jacobs. All four of us are amped up on adrenaline, and I feel like I could take over the world.

As we’re gathering up our things, Leslie says to Randall and Wendy, “Would you two mind giving Ash and me a minute?”

Wendy raises her eyebrows at her friend. “You sure?”

My brother gives me a questioning look, and I nod at him.

“Yes,” Leslie says. “You two head on out. You can leave the door open.”

My heart is racing as Randall and Wendy exit the room. I wonder if they’ll stop outside and eavesdrop.

Leslie sits back down in her chair and pats the seat next to hers. I round the table and sit. We swivel our chairs so we’re facing each other but not quite touching knees.

“Hi,” she says with a smile.

I return the expression. “Hi.”

“You feeling good about this?” she asks in a low voice.

I’m not sure if she’s talking about us or the proposal, so I ask, “About the foundation?”

She nods.

“I haven’t felt better about many other things in my life.”

“I figured as much,” she says. “Same here. There’s something I’d like you to think about. I don’t want an answer immediately, and it’s related to the question in my letter, so you can get into it when you respond if you want.” She raises an eyebrow. “Unless you’ve already sent the next letter?”

“No.” After the girls left last night, I didn’t have enough mental or emotional energy to write.

“Okay, here’s what I want you to think about. This isn’t technically going to be up to us, but would you ever consider doing something like heading up this foundation?”

She reaches for my hand, and I allow her to take it between hers as I think about what she’s asking. Though it’s hard to focus with her soft, warm hands lightly stroking mine.

When I don’t respond, she says, “You came alive in this meeting, Ash. You were in your element. I haven’t seen you in work mode much. In fact, I’ve only seen you working at the game on Friday. When you were talking with Bobby, you were comfortable and confident. You knew what to say, and you got the job done. But when you were talking with Diego’s cousins and asking them about their lives and their families and their dreams, and when you were leading us in here, I felt like this was the sort of thing you were born to do.”

She chokes over the final words, and tears well up. I put my other hand on her knee and feel a pricking sensation behind my eyes. I’m glad she doesn’t want an answer now, because I don’t know what to say. I simply nod and squeeze her leg.

Leslie slips her hands away from mine and rolls her chair back. My own hands suddenly feel cold.

She stands. “Think about it, okay?”

I nod again and watch her walk away.

forty-one

Walking away from Ash after our meeting is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. The feelings swirling inside me are so much stronger and deeper than anything I ever felt for Glenn. Ash Hamilton is an absolutely incredible man, and I don’t come close to deserving him.

Wendy is waiting for me in my office. “You want to talk about it?”

I shake my head as I stand stock still in the middle of the room. Tears spill down my face, and Wendy rushes over to shut the door. Then she wraps her arms around me, and I sob on her shoulder as she rubs my back.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” she says. “Did Ash say something to upset you?”

I shake my head again. “No. He did nothing wrong. He’s perfect.”

Wendy gives me a squeeze, leads me to my chair, and places a box of tissues in my lap. I pull a couple out and attempt to clean myself up.

“Why are you doing this to yourself?” she asks from her perch next to me on my desk. “Why not be with him? It’s obviously killing you both to not be together.”

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