Page 50 of Halstead House

I relaxed into a smile. “I’ve always been told not to judge a book by its cover.”

Marshall’s shoulders shook with amusement, and he pushed some buttons on his phone. The sounds of Aerosmith filled the room while we cleaned and restored everything to its proper place. Marshall sang along to the songs while Ana teased him for his singing voice. Lucas, although more reserved than the others, was the most relaxed I’d ever seen him. I tried not to think too much about it, or how attractive it made him appear.

I excused myself abruptly when everything was done, and retrieved my jacket from under Lucas’s things. I hustled out of the room and up the back staircase, not willing to wait on the elevator, until I was safe in my room. Only then did I allow myself to take a deep breath. Unsettling things were happening in my head regarding Lucas, and I didn’t appreciate it. I wished there was someone to give me advice on how to control it, or at least words of comfort. I certainly wasn’t going to mention it to Eliza or Ana, and Lucas himself could never find out. Never.

CHAPTER 13

I successfully avoided seeing Lucas for a few days, during which I was able to re-shore my defenses and convince myself I had imagined any and all emotions radiating toward him. This was made easier by knowing that he in no way radiated anything toward me... and a little bit easier because I was a pro at talking myself out of emotion. Which is a sad state of affairs when I really think about it.

I spoke with Eliza a few times over the phone and fielded a few event-related phone calls. I spent most of my time working in my room, and I spent the evenings going on walks with Ana or reading in the garden. The pace had slowed down with Eliza gone, but I was okay with that. My life in Providence had been full speed ahead all the time. I’d choose slower and filled with new friends over fast and empty any day.

Lucas shattered my illusions of peace by appearing in the kitchen during breakfast on Friday morning with our tour guide, Steven, following closely behind. I nearly choked on the soft-boiled egg I’d been chewing.

“Good morning, everyone,” he said.

The way everyone’s eyes grew large as they swung his way proved that I wasn’t the only one caught off guard by his appearance. In the nearly seven weeks I’d been in residence, this was the first time I’d seen him in this particular room.

“Good morning,” Ana finally replied.

Her speaking seemed to jog everyone else’s brains, and we all joined her in greeting him.

“I wanted to thank everyone for the excellent work you’ve all been doing, especially picking up the slack while Eliza has been away. I’ve organized a dolphin watching harbor tour for this evening at seven. There will be food and drinks provided. I hope you’ll join me, and we’ll have some fun.” The room was quiet. I gathered that this had never happened before. To his credit, he held the smile in place through the silence before he pressed on. “I’m aware it’s a Friday night, and this is sudden. If you had plans already, you’re welcome to invite a guest if you’d like.” His gaze moved around the room.

“Sounds fun. The wife and I love harbor cruises,” Steven—bless him—said.

Chef Lou piped up, his accent thicker than ever. “I do not need plus one. Just me.”

“Thank you,” Ana said happily. “I’ll be there.”

“Yeah, sounds like fun,” Marshall agreed, nodding. “I’ll change my plans and bring my date along.”

Lucas’s eyes swung to me, and I had to blink a few times. I hated boats and being out on the open water. I loved walking the beach, and even swimming in the shallows. Swimming pools were fine as well. However, I broke into hives over the thought of anything deeper than five feet. It had everything to do with the fact that my father had drowned in a boating accident. While I didn’t remember him, I did remember the trepidation that my mother had instilled into me for deep water. Plus, wool shrinks, and I was a water-fearing little lamb.

I met his steady gaze, then looked to the others who were smiling and nodding. Old Grace reared her ugly head and instructed me to make everyone happy at my own expense, so I nodded as well.

His shoulders seemed to relax a smidgen. “Great. It’s through Lavender Island Cruises at Pier 17. Boat leaves at seven o’clock sharp. Be on board by 6:45.” He turned to Ana. “Ana, will you please let the day staff know they’re invited as well? They can bring a plus one too if they’d like.” Ana nodded and then he was gone, leaving a wake behind him that seemed to keep us all off balance.

My inner wolf whimpered.

“Well, that’s a first,” Marshall said, breaking the silence.

I was too panicky to ask what he meant, and was grateful when they all returned to eating breakfast with no further comment.

I was miserable the entire day. I couldn’t focus on my work. My palms and the soles of my feet were sweaty, and my neck felt tight. I wanted so desperately to find Lucas and tell him that I couldn’t go on the harbor tour, but he was trying to do something kind, which made it impossible for me to speak up.

Perhaps I could make myself sick. It wouldn’t be too hard to fake that. All I’d need to do was induce vomiting and let Ana catch me in the act. I could moan about my stomach aching and with how much I was already sweating, it would be believable. It was worth a try.

In the end I did nothing.

I had made a lot of progress in standing up for myself, but not quite enough when it came to the idea of disappointing these people I cared about. Ana, Marshall, Lou, and Steven had become my friends, and I’d had so few friendships that I didn’t dare do anything to taint, or even worse, end, these new ones. The concept of unconditional affection was still so new to me that I didn’t dare test it. Logical or not, I worked it up in my head that the success of this entire adventure lay on my shoulders.

Besides, honesty moment, I hadn’t actually been out on a boat before. I’d avoided them my entire life. Maybe I’d be just fine. I’d lived through the ferry ride when I’d made my way here from Providence, after all. Perhaps this was a mind-over-matter situation.

I mean, for many years I never tried sushi because Mother said it would poison my insides, give me a worm, and leave me suffering in agony. Then one day I decided to try it on a whim, and I’d loved it. I was still living worm-free. Maybe boating would be the same way.

But probably not.

Ana offered to drive out to Pier 17 in her fatality-mobile. This time Chef Lou joined us. I had insisted he sit in the front, not only to be polite and to prevent me from such an up close view of all the near accidents we would experience, but also to make it unnecessary for me to keep up conversation. They cheerfully chattered about the adventure while I was mostly silent. My lips were numb with worry. I could hardly squeak words out of my dry throat. I kept chewing on my lips and squeezing my hands together.