Page 15 of A Class of Her Own

Immediately upon my opening the door to Ash’s bright smile with Jake standing behind her, Betty launched herself onto Jake’s leg and bit his kneecap before letting out some sort of jungle call and zigzagging across the room and under the couch.

After getting over the shock, Jake, who proved to be a forgiving soul, carried their luggage to the guest room where Betty had launched out of the closet and onto his back as he bent over to set down the bags. How she’d gotten from the living room to the guest closet was a mystery. Nevertheless, she wrapped her front legs around his neck and screeched to raise the roof while Jake ran out of the guest room and into my kitchen screaming as loud as the cat was. Gray fuzz flew, and so did some spittle from Jake’s mouth, although I’d never dream of mentioning it.

As Ash and I chased the whirling pair around the room, trying to pry Betty off before she managed to mangle his jugular and send him to the hospital, I started to wonder if Betty might have slipped from the pro-feminist movement straight into anti-male rhetoric. It was a troubling thought, for sure. Man-hating was a slippery slope.

Jake’s neck was now bandaged, and he had a scratch over one hazel eye. Luckily, his hair was a little long in the front, so I figured he could cover it. It wasn’t easy, but we got Betty firmly closed in my bathroom where she seemed to be going through some sort of mental breakdown. I doubted I’d find my towels all in one piece.

Ash sat on my couch, Jake next to her as she squeezed his hand, and he tried to offer her a smile. We were all breathing heavily, my navy shirt sticking to my back with nerve sweat followed by horrified sweat followed by relieved sweat. My body was probably on the verge of dehydration at this point.

“You, uh, have a nice home,” Jake finally said.

A hysterical laugh I’d been trying to tamp down on forced itself out of my throat, and I gave into it. “It’s really nice to meet you.”

As the three of us laughed, I finally had a chance to inspect my youngest sister’s boyfriend. Jake was on the shorter side, which had been convenient for reaching the cat wrapped around his neck, with the muscular build of a man whose entire existence was built around being outdoors. His skin was tan, with laugh lines around his hazel eyes, and his hair had a few last summer sun streaks in the darker locks that were coming on with the winter. All in all, he looked solid and kind, dependable -- a guy you’d rely on during an emergency. It was really all I’d ever hoped my sisters would find.

“That wasn’t quite the welcome I’d expected,” Ash wiped some makeup from under her amused eyes. “I didn’t know Jake was going to cause a crack in the force.”

“I think Betty might be going through puberty,” I grinned.

“I had no idea she hated men,” Ash added. “Then again, I doubt you’ve had much of a chance to test that theory.”

The look she gave me was sly and so sister-ish that she deserved the pillow I threw at her. “I’ve had guys here before.”

“Sure. The plumber, the furniture delivery guy, the appliance repairman.” She turned to Jake with a giggle. “Meredith hates men. That’s probably where her cat gets it.”

My jaw flew open, and I reacted in spite of knowing she was purposely pushing my buttons and didn’t mean a word of it. “That’s not true. I love men. I think they’re very . . .” I shook my head, digging for words, which only made Ash laugh again. “Good looking. They’re good looking and, handy to . . . have . . around . . . with their, you know, muscles and, um . . .”

“Like I said. No men for Meredith. She wouldn’t date a guy if I paid her to.”

I leaned back into the chair cushion and folded my arms across my chest. “Not true. I’d accept your money, but I’ve dated without it.”

“Name one guy, just one, that you’ve gone out with since Ron.”

I pouted, and Jake’s eyes grew large. “Ron sounds interesting.”

“Ron couldn’t handle this,” I gestured at myself. “He tucked tail and ran.”

“He lasted a year, though,” Ash said, as though he deserved an award for sticking it out.

“So, I can be a lot,” I said.

“Some guys like ‘a lot’,” Jake replied easily.

I nodded. “I like this one, Ash. Does he have any brothers?”

Ash laughed and kissed him on the cheek. “No. But he does have a sister who trains dogs. She may be able to consult with you about your rabid cat.”

“Betty isn’t rabid.” I pursed my lips in thought. “You know, she did show a guy her bum the other day. Maybe that was a sign.”

Ash and Jake both looked at me like I should be in the bathroom shredding towels with my cat. “Please, go on,” Ash said at last.

“Well, I was talking to a neighbor outside, and she turned and pushed her bum to the window,” I smiled remembering. “He said she was hideous.”

“He called Betty ugly?” Ash frowned. “She’s adorable.”

“I know.”

“Terrifying, but adorable. Who was this guy?” Ash asked. “The guy you were talking to?”

---