Page 36 of The Yips

I didn’t expect Avery to be so excited about my ideas, but her enthusiasm was contagious. We hammered out several ideas, ordered lunch, and worked until I had to leave for work. Carlos and Sam had to be at the stadium for a home game, and I expected a busy closing shift; while technically,I had been working all day, our work energized me, and I could have kept going if I hadn’t had to get ready for a night at the bar.

Carlos and Avery had two kids: a five-year-old daughter, Scarlet, and a seven-year-old son, Carlos. Scarlet had spent the afternoon entertaining Crew, and he had giggled at almost everything she said. Carlos Jr. had been interested briefly but found the game on his tablet more interesting than the baby. Avery checked in multiple times to ensure he was playing educational games, and he had to practice reading in Spanish for thirty minutes.

“Sorry, we had always planned to speak Spanish at home, but we increasingly use English. It’s important for both of us that the kids can communicate fluently with both sides of the family.”

“My father’s family was from Quebec; he spoke French in the home when he was younger. I never learned French, despite taking years of it in school. I still believe immersion is the only way to understand another language,” I said, remembering feeling clueless any time my Canadian family members spoke French around me.

“That and consistency, which is where we struggle now. Carlos mentioned you’ll be in New York this weekend. I’m going to all three games and bringing the kids. I know you were only planning to go for Sam’s start, but if he’s at the game anyway, you should come too. New York games are always entertaining.’

“I hadn’t thought about what I would do. I don’t know when I’ll land on Friday, but I don’t think I’ll be there on time. Sam plans to show me the city on Sunday, and it might be too much for the baby after a busy travel day. He’s a good baby, but I’ve been throwing a lot at him.”

Avery said, “I have to keep reminding myselfhow young you are. You have been thrown right into this crazy lifestyle, and it suits you. Even Crew goes with the flow. You’re a good mom, Kelsey.”

“Thank you,” I said, feeling the sting of tears as my eyes welled up. I quickly packed up and said goodbye, not wanting Avery to see me cry.

At work that night, I went through the motions, but my mind was back at Avery’s, thinking about how we could make the most impact. I poured beers, opened bottles, and cans for the pre- and post-game rush. When we closed for the night, I cleaned the mess behind the bar and washed the sludge from the floor. I checked my phone before leaving to find a text from Sam, unable to hold back a grin. I let him know that I was leaving now and assured him I wouldn’t be closing the bar alone and promised to text him when I got home for the night.

At home, I relieved my father, and texted Sam. I got in the shower and washed the day off of me before I collapsed into bed. At that moment, I was thrilled that I wouldn’t be driving Uber in the morning. Crew and I could sleep in, and those extra three hours had made a massive difference in my mental health. Yes, moving home would be a hassle, but the sleep was amazing.

CHAPTER 32

Sam

Iwouldn't say I liked the thought of Kelsey working the bar late into the night, serving drunk patrons, and commiserating over the team’s loss tonight. The loss had been brutal; our starter, Nick Lopes, had left in the top of the seventh with a five-run lead that our closer had allowed our opponents to erase. Boston fans handle wins and losses equally poorly, with copious amounts of alcohol.

Kelsey texted me when she got home, as I’d asked. Yes, it put my mind at ease, but it did nothing to alleviate my need to care for her. I wanted to solve every problem she had, but I knew it was way too early. Theoretically, once she got the non-profit off the ground, she would work there, but that was months away if we were lucky. I wouldn’t survive much longer with her closing the bar alone. At least her impending move home eliminated the need for her to drive Uber. Being in a car alone with drunks was far more dangerous than being in a public place.

I woke up early on Sunday, trained, and prepared for Monday to have Kelsey and Crew overnight. The master suite adjoins a small bedroom, initially designed as anursery, which I currently use as a sitting area. The bassinet would fit nicely in there. It was currently yet another space I didn’t use or need in my home. The travel bassinet was on wheels; if Kelsey was uncomfortable with him in another room, she could always wheel him into us. I had Monica purchase a baby monitor with a camera, just in case.

My mother had warned me that if I didn’t watch out, I’d get attached to the baby. That ship had already sailed. Those two had marched into my life, and I was done. Kelsey could ask me for anything, and the answer would be yes. The beauty was that she’d never ask for a single thing.

I tried to remember the man I was when I got into that Uber a few weeks ago—that man was self-absorbed and overly concerned with baseball records and pleasing his father. I couldn’t care less about what my father has to say about my life today. He could critique my playing from the sidelines, but I’d somehow put a mental shield against his onslaught. I wouldn’t say that I was not concerned with how Kelsey would handle their meeting, but I think I’d adequately prepared her. And I was no longer afraid to tell him where to go if he acted up in front of her. God forbid he aimed any of his bullshit at her.

The funny thing was that I started breaking records once I stopped worrying about my stats. Was Kelsey good luck? Maybe not in a cosmic, mystical way, but she was good for me.

I knew my place would intimidate her and, at once, hated the opulence because it would make her uncomfortable. Still, I wanted to teach her that she deserved every luxury available. The Stella McCartney dress she had worn for dinner in Minneapolis was noted on Page Six, and thankfully, they had not posted the price tag. Kelsey knew there was an income gap between us, but she’d hateknowing that that dress could have supported her and Crew for a month. Did this make me want to spoil her more? Fuck yes. I would drape her in diamonds if she’d let me.

It had been long since I’d had butterflies before a game. But this game was less about what happened on the mound and more about what happened once we got home. The days-long teasing over text had me so keyed up that I almost skipped my pre-game routine. What I hadn’t missed was a whole battery of STD tests, which were all negative, as expected.

Me to Kelsey: I wanted to talk to you about something before tomorrow night.

Kelsey: This sounds ominous.

Me: No, but I figured it would be important for you to know. I was tested for STDs, and I’m clean.

Kelsey: I was wondering how to ask…

Me: I fully understand that right now, it’s also Crew’s health. I won’t do anything to jeopardize either of you.

Kelsey: I have an IUD. And I was tested when I was pregnant. There was no one during or after.

I hadn’t suspected that there had been anyone in Kelsey’s life during or after pregnancy, but it was a relief to hear her confirm it.

Me: How effective is an IUD?

Kelsey: It’s one of the most effective forms of birth control. It’s 99% effective and isn’t impacted by human error.

Me: Were you on birth control when you got pregnant with Crew?

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