Page 43 of The Yips

“I didn’t ask you guys here and expect you not to take up space. I’m also aware that infants don’t regularly sleep through the night. I can help and want to help if you’ll let me. Did you see him when he saw me? He recognized me and was excited to see me.” I was still on cloud nine from seeing him after the game. Justone smile from that little dude would make even the worst game worth it.

“Yeah, that was cute. He does it for me when I get home from work or when my dad gets to my place to watch him. He’s changed so much in such a short period.”

“What was it like when he was first born?”

“It’s sad, but I was in a fog for the first six weeks. I look at pictures from that time, and it’s almost like I’m watching someone else. My mom took two weeks off and stayed with me; initially, I assumed it was to help me. But now I think she feared that I couldn’t do it alone. Having her there created a bit of a crutch, and my first night alone, I stayed up all night staring at him. By the middle of the next afternoon, I was so exhausted that I called my family, sobbing. We’ve come a long way since then.”

Kelsey stifled a yawn, and I said, “Okay, go back to sleep. If he wakes up again, let me get him.”

“If you insist,” she said and fell back to sleep. I followed shortly after.

Around five, I heard Crew stir on the monitor before Kelsey woke. I jumped up to get him before she noticed. I’d managed to change his diaper, but he wasn’t going to be satisfied sucking on my fingers for long.

“Hey,” I said, kissing her good morning. “This guy is hungry. I have a comfortable chair on the balcony. Do you want to bring him out there?”

“Oh, that would be great. Thanks for getting him up.” She pulled herself out of bed and patted his bottom, “Wait, did you change him too?”

“I did, I didn’t realize baby poop looked like seeded mustard.”

“That’s what happens when you breastfeed. It looksslightly different from the formula and gets bad once they start solids. Or at least that’s what everyone tells me.”

I helped Kelsey by opening the door to the balcony, and once she was settled. “I know you aren’t drinking coffee, but can I get you herbal tea? It’s decaf.”

“Yes, please.”

I went down to the kitchen, made myself a cup of coffee, boiled water for Kelsey’s tea, and carried both mugs upstairs to where she was still nursing Crew on the balcony.

“It’s so peaceful out here,” she said.

“It is, but I like my rooftop patio a bit more. I don’t always have a reason to use it, though.”

“He’s finished eating. Why don’t you show me now? Can you hold him while I use the bathroom?”

“Hey, buddy,” I said and kissed his head. “I’m going to try to make your mommy love this place, and hopefully, you’ll get to visit more.” With every word I said, he smiled wider. I was so gone for this woman, toast for this little boy. If they walked out of my life tomorrow, I’d be devastated.

“Ok, ready,” Kelsey said, leaving the bathroom. She’d put her hair up in a messy bun, and her T-shirt was longer than her shorts. “What were you saying to Crew?”

“Not much, just making plans.”

Kelsey’s jaw dropped when I brought her out onto the roof. We had a panoramic view of the city from up here, with views of the Charles River, the Longfellow Bridge, and the Boston Common. I had several lounge chairs and a couch with a small fire pit built into the table. I had an awning that provided sunshade or retracted if you preferred. But showing this space to Kelsey, I wanted her to love it.

“Do you like it?” I asked.

“Oh my God, I love it! I love this city, and the view here showcases everything I love about it.”

CHAPTER 39

Kelsey

Was Sam trying to make me never want to leave? His rooftop patio was insane. Nursing Crew on the balcony this morning? So peaceful. Other than his brief wake-up at two, Crew slept well. I couldn’t lie and pretend it wasn’t nice having someone up with me in the middle of the night.

The pessimist in me wanted to think that there was something wrong with Sam’s interest in Crew. But my boy went insane every time Sam walked into the room.

“Hey, look. We made the news.”

Sam held up his phone; he’d been drinking his coffee and scrolling the internet. When I got closer, I noticed the caption “Baby Mama.” The brief article detailed a lack of information on when Sam had a baby.

“That’s an adorable picture of you two.”

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