Page 94 of The Yips

I buried my head in his shoulder, tears running down my face, the culmination of the day’s emotions as he carried me over to the couch. He sat down, settling me on his lap, and pushed my hair out of my face.

“Tell me what you’re thinking. This was anxiety, wasn’t it?”

“Maybe? I don’t know. I just needed some way to show you what you mean to me.”

“That’s not how, love. God, baby, I don’t need that. You’re my equal in this. I don’t give you gifts and take care of you guys expecting sexual favors.”

“Sam, I bringnothingto the table except a ton of baggage.”

“You and Crew are everything to me. I didn’t realize how lonely I was until you both entered my life. You not only gave baseball back to me because it wasn’t fulfilling before this summer, but you gave me something to look forward to outside of baseball. You also made me realize I could do both. I can have a family and my career simultaneously, and that career will make it so I can support our family. And you gave me hope that once my career is over, I will find meaning.”

I wiped my tears on his shoulder and met his eyes. “When we were talking about your parents, I realized something. You’re my end game, too.”

“Kelsey, you’re my whole game. You, Crew, and all the beautiful babies we will have.”

“Sam, can I be honest about something? I don’t know if I want to go back to school. I feel like I should because I thought I needed to do it. But I love being home with Crew, spending my days with him, and taking care of our home. Would you think less of me if I decided that was enough?”

“I want you to be happy. If you want to wait until I retire and go to school? Great. If you never decide to go back? I only care if you aren’t choosing this for yourself.”

“When I returned to work, everything I did was for Crew. But it all required me to leave him with someone else.I love my father but don’t want him raising my son. I want to be there for him.”

“I agree you should be home with him if that’s what you want. But if you ever decide it’s not enough or that you need more, you need to tell me.”

“And I love Boston. I love living in the city, but I also kinda want to live in Concord.”

“That’s very specific, Kels,” Sam said with a chuckle.

“I might have it on my Pinterest vision board somewhere. But again, not something I felt I could say.”

“OK, how about this? You keep telling me about your dreams, and I try to figure out how to make them come true.”

“Damn, baby. And I don’t even need to get my knees all dirty.”

“You’re gonna get your knees plenty dirty, but not because I bought you a house in Concord, but because you like it.”

“Oh, Sam, I do like it.”

“Good, then we’ve got most of it figured out. As for the house in Concord, we can meet with my financial planner at the end of the season. He’ll help us figure out a budget and long-term planning. I went big on the place in the city, and keeping both places might not be worthwhile.”

“Are you saying rooftop patios don’t come cheap?”

“Private rooftop patios are a luxury we might not need if we have our dream home in the suburbs.”

“And a pool,” I said matter of fact.

“See? I knew you liked Josie’s place.”

CHAPTER 82

Sam

Kelsey’s birthday surprise included a trip to the Space Needle at nighttime. While I wished that I had time to show her the city where I used to live, I was busy with training. We’d been spoiled earlier in the summer, and I had been able to spend plenty of downtime with her, but with the Minutemen in contention for a playoff berth, I would be focusing less on sightseeing and more on recovery and strength.

Tom traveled to Seattle, and his mother met him there. He’d been putting in an incredible effort to meet us where we were throughout the summer. He watched Crew while we took advantage of a date night alone. He had booked an adjoining room, and this would be his first overnight stay. I hated sharing Crew with another man, but Tom was as good as they got.

“I wish I had time to plan this trip to show you more sights. Yes, the Space Needle is iconic, but there is so much more you would have loved. I left you guys on your own.”

Kelsey closed the gap between us, slipped her arms around my waist, and rested hercheek on my chest.

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