Page 46 of Frat Around and Find Out

“To enemy territory, you mean?” I ask, and my teasing makes him crack a smile.

He guides me up to his room and grabs me a White Claw. He sips on his own while I drink some of mine.

“I guess that was a lot for anyone to hear, and I probably shouldn’t have trauma-dumped on you,” he says.

“I don’t think that’s considered trauma-dumping. I made it clear I wanted you to share. We all go through shit, and it was a lot weighing on you. I can’t imagine not having someone you can talk to about that stuff. I’m the one who should be apologizing for rushing out like that.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Ty says. “You were great.”

“I could have done better.”

“I’m not really sure that’s true,” he insists before quieting. “Are you okay?”

There it is again. He knows something. I can see it in those bright blue eyes, set on me, like they’re probing into my soul.

I start to say something, but the words catch in my throat. I remind myself this isn’t just about me needing to get it off my chest. I don’t want him feeling so fucking alone. Because damn, I know how alone this shit can feel.

“Last night when you asked me if I was okay,” I say, “you could tell I had my own loss, couldn’t you?”

He nods.

“I’m still all in my head, whether or not I should tell you, but…um…Ihadan older brother.”

His expression softens.

“When I was younger. I was ten, he was twelve when he was diagnosed with cancer.”

“Oh my God, Lance.”

“It’s okay,” I say, but then stop myself. “I didn’t mean that.It’s not okay. It’ll never be okay.” I’m quiet again for a moment, struggling to find the words. “It was two years of treatments and attempts to beat it, and I really thought he was gonna make it. I think we all did, even the doctors. It was just too late, and…” My eyes water, my face twisting up, and I feel like I’m about to lose myself to emotion. “Fuck,” I mutter. “And now I’m the one trauma-dumping, and I’ve shared all that, and I don’t even know if it was a good idea.”

I look to Ty, who wears a blank expression, as if it’s beyond him what to do with it all.

“I’m gonna just—”

As I’m about to start for the door, get myself out of this incredibly awkward situation I created, I feel arms wrapping around me, Ty pressing his face against mine as he holds me close, like he’s bracing me for the emotional fall.

It’s something I didn’t even realize I needed, but now I feel so at ease, this weight off me as I keep him tight against me, because I’m certain this isn’t just for me, that he needs it too.

Finally, he pulls away, rubbing his hand against my arm, and his touch feels so soothing. With one arm still around me, his gaze meets mine. This isn’t like last night when I feared he was looking into my eyes and seeing things he shouldn’t, but like he’s seeing things in me I’m allowing him to see.

“I’m sorry you had to go through all that. None of us should have to deal with this kind of pain.”

Sadly, we both know that doesn’t matter.

His breath slams against my face because he’s so close, and I catch my gaze drifting to his lips before licking my own. Selfishly, some part of me wants to just move forward and take a kiss.

Maybe because it felt so good to do all the other stuff we’ve done, hug included, I just know a kiss would feel good too—and that it would help me, not forget about Kacey, but be able to ease the searing pain in my chest.

I’m thinking this is just my own wish, but then he leans forward, his lips even closer, our gazes locking.

I’m not even sure who initiates it, but one moment we’re looking at each other, and the next it’s just lips before I feel my back up against the wall. It’s a bit of madness as we’re a frenzy of movement, excited nerves and pulsing bodies, his tongue slipping into my mouth so effortlessly, greeting mine.

And it’s the distraction I need because I can barely think straight as I’m all sensation, following the inspiration of our movements as our mouths widen, as we try to get more of a taste of each other, falling into a rhythm that reminds me that there’s something so naturally in sync about moving with him.

I grip the back of his head, keeping him close as his body pushes against mine, and once we’ve finally settled into the experience, his mouth drifts down to my chin, trailing to my neck.

I roll my head back, basking in the pleasure that pools through me as Ty shows me what he can do with that expert mouth. I find myself moaning, my breath hitching, and it seems as soon as I’m missing him against my lips, he somehow intuits this, and we’re kissing again.

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