Page 41 of Faking It (and falling in love)

“The feeling is entirely mutual,” said Philippa, her voice barely above a whisper. “But I don’t want to take advantage of you while you’re in a vulnerable state.”

“Oh please do shut up,” breathed Alex. “I might be having a challenging day, but I know exactly what I’m doing.” She closed the gap between them and kissed Philippa.

Philippa’s body came to life, all the sensations she’d been imagining washing over her at once. She kissed Alex back, longing for their contact to linger longer than the last one had.

Alex’s lips were soft, but demanded more, causing Philippa to part her own. She wanted as much of Alex as she was willing to offer. She felt Alex’s tongue touch her own and she groaned audibly.

Alex pulled away momentarily. “You ok?” she asked.

Philippa knew she probably appeared flushed, but she smiled. “More than ok.”

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Philippa leaned into Alex and kissed her, relaxing into it this time. She could get used to kissing this woman, she decided. Alex’s arms were around her waist, and Philippa allowed her hand to travel up Alex’s side to her face. Her skin was warm and smooth. She knew she wanted more, but she didn’t know how to ask for it. The sense of wanting more was new to her. She’d been on the other end of it with Paul, and with men she’d dated in her youth. She’d always assumed that all women felt slightly uncomfortable about it. She’d never even considered she might feel that way about someone herself. But here she was, contemplating bringing her hand downwards to brush Alex’s breast. And at the same time, being terrified to make any kind of move that might scare Alex away. She pulled back slightly.

“Ok?” asked Alex. “I know this isn’t something you’ve done before, and I don’t want you to feel pressured. If you want to stop, or you want me to go, please just say. It will be ok. I promise.”

“I’m absolutely fine,” smiled Philippa. “And honestly, I’m not sure how I would cope if you left right now.”

Alex laughed. “Well, thank goodness for that. Now, for heaven’s sake, please touch me.” And she leaned towards Philippa to kiss her. This time more fiercely.

Philippa didn’t need telling twice, and brought her hand downwards, running her finger along Alex’s cotton shirt collar. Her neck was inviting, and she broke the contact between their lips to dip her head and kiss under her collar. Alex leaned her head back and sighed. “Am I doing it right?” asked Philippa, her voice muffled by the material.

“More than right,” said Alex. “You’re a natural.”

“I’m not sure about that,” said Philippa, beginning to unbutton Alex’s shirt without thinking. Once she had dealt with the top three buttons she slipped her hand onto Alex’s chest, grazing the lace at the top of her bra.

“Yes, Phil, that’s right,” said Alex, her voice low.

There was something immediately wonderful to Philippa about eliciting this kind of response from Alex. This was a woman who always seemed so in control, who had been there and seen it all. But here was Philippa, inexperienced and nervous, making Alex breathe more and more heavily. Philippa’s own breath had deepened, and she brought her face back to Alex’s, to kiss her lips again as she moved her hand down further and stroked Alex’s breast. It was Philippa’s turn to sigh, and she could feel herself coming undone.

“How asleep is your daughter?” whispered Alex, her voice urgent.

“That is a very good question,” said Philippa, mindful that the stairs came out directly into the living room where they were sat, snogging like teenagers. “Perhaps I should go and check.”

“Good plan,” said Alex.

“And if she is asleep, I propose you join me upstairs. My room’s at the opposite end of the house to hers. Turn left at the top of the stairs – I’ll text you if it’s ok,” said Philippa.

“I love Boss Philippa,” said Alex, a glint in her eye. “All masterful.”

Philippa blushed, but she was enjoying the other woman teasing her. She tiptoed up the stairs. With every step she prayed that Dottie was fast asleep so she could close her door. Her daughter always insisted on falling asleep with it open, as if afraid she might miss something interesting if she let it close. She was nothing if not on brand, even at bedtime.

Trying to be as stealthy as possible, Philippa poked her head around the doorway. Dottie was fast asleep, splayed out on her bed, an open book in one hand. Philippa slowly put out her hand and took the door handle gently. With infinite care, she pulled the door towards her, making as little sound as possible. She had come this far, and to wake Dottie at this point would be a tragedy for her sex life. She knew that for a fact. She allowed the door to close, then paused on the landing, taking a breath. She’d done it. She silently punched the air, careful not to hit anything and make a sound.

Once in her bedroom, Philippa took out her phone and texted Alex. “All clear. The eagle has landed.”

A few seconds later she heard footsteps on the landing. Alex appeared in the doorway, stifling a giggle. “The eagle has landed?” she whispered.

Philippa put a finger to her lips. “Shhh, close the door. Lock it.”

Alex did as she was told, then turned to walk towards Philippa, who was sitting on the end of her bed. With each step, Alex undid another of her buttons, shedding her shirt just as she reached Philippa. “This reminds me of when I used to sneak to my girlfriend’s house when I was in my teens,” said Alex, leaning forward to unbutton Philippa’s top. “Her parents didn’t approve, so she’d let me in through the back door after they went to sleep, and I’d spend the night, only to have to escape before dawn.”

“Wow,” said Philippa. “I didn’t do anything even vaguely that exciting or…” she gasped at Alex’s hand on her breast, the sensation from her nipple interrupting the connection between her brain and her voice.

Alex put her other hand onto Philippa’s shoulder and gently pushed her back. “Is this ok?” she asked. Philippa nodded, before grabbing the back of Alex’s neck and pulling her down onto her.

“It’s all ok,” said Philippa, not wanting to delay matters any further. “I want you.”

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