“It never felt like a calling until Jon turned it into one.” I looked over at him. “He showed me that being a hunter was what I was meant to do. That I was built for it.”
“I ken that,” he said softly. “Clarity of purpose.”
“Did you have that? Before… everything?”
He smiled, though there was something sad in it. “Before I became a vampire, ye mean? I was to be a tailor, like my pa. And I had no interest in it whatsoever. I only wanted glory and adventure.”
“So you joined the army.” It didn’t seem that adventurous to me, but then the world was… smaller, back then.
“Aye.” His knuckles whitened on the steering wheel. “Found nae glory nor adventure, mind ye. Just death and regret.”
I reached out, covering his hand with mine. His skin was cool beneath my touch.
“What about now?” I asked. “What do you want now?”
He glanced at me briefly, his eyes reflecting the pale white streetlights. “Peace, I think. Redemption. Though I’m no sure such a thing exists for me.”
“And me?” I hadn’t meant to say it, but the words were out there now.
“You, Erin,” he breathed, “are the dream I ne’er thought I’d truly find. Or deserve.” His fingers twined with mine. “What about you? What do ye want? Beyond hunting, beyond all of this?” He gestured vaguely.
I took a deep breath. “I don’t know yet. I’ve lost too manypeople lately – and I’ve learned to value the people I still have. So I suppose… to find something that makes all the pain and loss worth it.”
“And have ye?”
I studied our joined hands, thinking of him. Of Tom and Adam and Isabel. “I’m beginning to think I might have.”
He brought my hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to my knuckles. “We’re more alike than ye ken, you and I. Both fighters. Both stubborn as the day is long.”
I laughed. “I amnotstubborn.”
He raised an eyebrow, humour dancing in his eyes. “Aye, and I’m the Queen o’ Scots.”
“Fine,” I conceded. “But only when it’s important.”
“Tis one of the things I admire about ye,” he said. “Your determination. Your fire.”
“Even if it’s directed at you?”
“Especially then,” he grinned. “A wee bit o’ danger makes life interesting, love.”
I shook my head, smiling despite myself. “You’re impossible.”
“So Adam tells me. Frequently.” He squeezed my hand gently. “But I’m also yours, if you’ll have me. Impossible and all.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that. We fell into a comfortable silence, fingers still laced together as he steered with his other hand. Outside, the streets grew narrower and darker as we left the city centre behind. The knot of anxiety in my chest loosened a little with each new breath.
When we pulled up at Seven, the warehouses loomed like great concrete monoliths against the night sky. The industrial district was always eerily quiet at this hour – no workers, no machinery, just the occasional skitter of something in the shadows and the distant hum of the city.
Nicholas held my door as I climbed out of the car, and paused at the edge of the lot, his gaze sweeping the warehouses with military precision.
He frowned. “She doesnae allow weapons, aye?”
I nodded – it hadn’t stopped me from bringing my sword along, but I’d tucked it under the passenger seat and planned to leave it behind.
“Perhaps we should break her rule this once. There’s somethin’ no right about this place. The scent…” He didn’t finish, but I was already strapping the sword on, its weight settling against my spine with the familiar click of harness buckles. My fingers moved through the motions – thread, tighten, secure. I raised a quick eyebrow at him, and he grinned, the corners of his eyes crinkled with barely contained amusement.
Brushing past him with a grin of my own, I headed straight for the largest building, and rapped my knuckles against the door. There was no sound from inside.