Page 66 of A Soul to Steal

Great. Gideon rolled his eyes, wondering what this arrogantshitheadwas about to spout.

“You asked me what Mavka have done to incite my anger. In truth, nothing.” The lack of emotion in his tone was lessthan compelling, and the annoying rhythmic thump of his claws pounded in his ears. “The issue lies solely in the fact that I have been the one to suffer the most, while that knowledge was then passed on to the rest of our kind. I am the one that is burdened, and yet none of you have been intelligent enough to be there for me. Instead, you came to my home and destroyed it in your curiosity, or forced me to interact when I would rather be left in peace. I sheltered you within my ward because I did not wish for my siblings to perish, and yet neither you nor Ingram thought beyond yourselves. All the other Mavka lack the intelligence I have obtained, and it makes you all selfish towards any plight I needed aid with. The question I was always left with was: why should I show affection for a family that cannot comfort or support me in return?”

“But we do not know how to be anything but ourselves,” Aleron argued, yet his voice was small and held a mingle of hurt and confusion. “We always tried to bring you within our embrace, tried to play with you, and you never wished to do the same.”

Since they’d stopped holding hands, Gideon placed his palm on Aleron’s knee in case he needed comfort. This time, Gideon would stay quiet and let them talk it out. It wasn’t his place, even if he had to bite his tongue.

“I know, and I don’t blame you for that. But you must understand this is the first time you and I have truly spoken that isn’t barely coherent rambling between you and Ingram. I couldn’t even hold a conversation with you, and would have had a better chance of speaking to a child. You were like two idiots that shared one brain. How could I bond with any of you when you all felt like strangers to me?”

“Then what of the other Mavka?” Aleron implored, throwing his hands forward. “Kitty is smart, but even he cautioned we should stay away from you. He taught us much.”

“And who do you think taught him?” Merikh snapped back. “Faunusdidn’t understand why I couldn’t let go of my hatred towards the world. He wanted me to see things his way, and it made me realise I was an outcast even among my own kind. He likely sees things more my way, now that he has faced true adversity, but it is too late. In my intolerance, I broke the potential for those bonds, and I did so willingly.”

Aleron directed his bat skull to Gideon. “Is that fair?”

“No, not really,” Gideon answered, breaking hisshortvow of silence. He winced at the reminder of his own behaviours. “But, to be honest, when you don’t feel like you belong in your family, it’seasy... to be resentful. I did a lot of things I’m not proud of.” Gideon cast a glare at Merikh. “But I never took it out on my sister when it really wasn’t her fault. I would never treat her this way.”

“I treat everyone this way,” Merikh stated, before he threw his head to the side. “Well, that is not true. I treated everyone on Earth this way. That world wanted to see a monster, so I gave it one. This world, though? A Nyl’therian water droplet has less cruelty and judgement in it than anyone on Earth.”

Gideon doubted that, as the people he’d known all his life were kind and caring.

“Still,” he grumbled, averting his gaze.

“Listen here, little human,” Merikh growled out, pointing his foreclaw at him. “I am the oldest and the wisest Mavka to live. You cannot put your ideologies and morality onto me. As a human, your opinion is biased. You have not suffered what we Mavka endure. We are not hunted just by Demons, but also by humans. You have others to depend on, towns and villages where you can create bonds. We are alone, and even turning to each other can result in a fight due to lacking the capabilities to articulate our wants.”

He returned to tapping his claws against the table, his orbs brighter in their red hue.

I guess it would be different for a Duskwalker.His gaze fell to Aleron, only for it to crinkle into a pained expression.

Gideon was aware that Demonslayers had tortured Ingram. Hell, Emerie had even been the one to capture him before she freed him. He couldn’t begin to imagine what life was like for them. If Merikh was indeed the oldest and had the most humanity, it would have been difficult to have a relationship with his fellow kin.

Even as a human, if there was a large age gap between siblings, it could put a significant strain on them. Then, to be estranged by their parents and feel like an outcast... no wonder Merikh had a bone to pick with the world.

He probably felt abandoned by everyone. The world itself.

And yet... Gideon couldn’t shake the desire to lean across this table, grab one of his horns, and slam his bony face against the wooden surface.

Even if it’s unfair, as the older sibling, you should understand that it’s not their fault.Wasn’t that what it was to be mature? To extend kindness in the face of pain, so you don’t extend that burden onto others?

Then he almost slapped his face into his palm.Once more, I’m thinking like a human.

He hated that part of what Merikh said made sense, and how it opened up old wounds within Gideon.

He’d tried to be fair to Emerie, but she had been three years younger than him. Plus, with the loss of his birth parents, the weight of expectations he thought had been thrust upon him, and the lack of self-understanding, Gideon hadn’t always been... considerate.

I wasn’t perfect...

“Loath as I am to admit it, Raewyn made me realise it has been envy that weighs on me,” Merikh said, finally halting the rhythm of his claws so he could fold his arms across his chest. He leaned back in his seat. “Although many traits about our kind bother me, as well as individual personalities, I was not spared the pain others were. I resented it, and I still do. Nothing can change the past, nor can it erase it from my memories. I thought they would fade once I found a place I was accepted, but all this?” He lifted both arms to gesture to their surroundings. “It just makes me question why I hadn’t been allowed a single day of peace until I met Raewyn.”

Aleron remained silent, likely trying to absorb everything that was said to him. Hopefully in the future, if he had questions, Gideon could potentially clarify most of it.

He did turn his skull to Gideon briefly, though, as if he registered something important relating to Merikh’s words. Aleron even tilted his head and gripped Gideon’s thigh a little tighter.

Why are my cheeks heating?Gideon thought, since nothing had been said, but he suddenly felt his pulse fluttering shyly.

Thankfully, they faced the bear-skulled Duskwalker again.

The situations Merikh had obviously dealt with in the past must have been difficult to face. His cold and spiteful demeanour gave the impression he was traumatised by it and was still struggling to heal.

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