Page 59 of The Hang Up

“First off, I talked to Cassie. I didn’t realize everything with Mom. I shouldn’t have blamed him.”

I was relieved by his words. It had been hard over the years trying to be understanding and a good friend to Sean when I knew that not everything he believed about his dad was correct. “What else?”

“I told him he deserved to be happy, and if this woman he’s seeing doesn’t understand that, he needs to find somebody new.”

There was so much wrong with that statement. But I couldn’t challenge him. I couldn’t tell him it was a guy. It was me. I absolutely understood and agreed that Joshua deserved happiness.

I excused myself and retreated to the kitchen. It was my happy place. And since I cooked in Joshua’s kitchen quite a bit, it was like visiting an old friend. Jesus. Maybe I should stop drinking wine. I set my glass down, leaned back against the counter, and closed my eyes. I just needed a moment alone.

“Hey, sweetie. Hiding out?” Mom. Great.

I opened one eye and shut it again. “No.”

“Where’s your man?”

Pushing off the counter, I braced myself. She wasn’t going away. “Mom. Be nice.”

“What?” she asked, holding out her hands. “I’m being nice. But I don’t like seeing you look so sad.”

It should’ve been a relief that my mom knew. One person I didn’t have to pretend around. But it felt like more pressure. Like she was waiting for us to implode. For everything to break apart so she could tell me how right she was. And that wasn’t fair. I knew it. “I’m not sad, Mom. Would I like to be able to hold his hand or kiss him without worrying who might see? Yes. But I’m perfectly fine with how things are. How things need to be.”

“I like Joshua. You know I do—”

“Everyone knows.”

She glared and stabbed her finger in my direction. “Do not get smart with me, young man.”

All the fight went out of me. I couldn’t blame my mom for being attracted to Joshua. Hell, most people were attracted to Joshua. “Sorry, Mom.”

She brushed back her carefully styled curls. “I’m trying, sweetie. I want you to be with someone your own age. But it’s not my choice. As long as he doesn’t hurt you, I’ll be fine.”

“I think Joshua might be a little afraid of you.”

She laughed. “I did threaten to cut off his balls.”

I stared at her. “You did? When was that?”

She thought about it, smiling at the memory. I was definitely going to tease Joshua about this later. “The night of the barbecue.”

“What?” I replayed the words in my head, but they still didn’t make sense.

She frowned. “The night of the barbecue. I told him that I wasn’t happy that you two were together and that if he hurt you, I would cut off his balls.”

I couldn’t believe this. “That was a week before you talked to us. He knew all that time?”

“He didn’t tell you? I assumed he would.”

I didn’t know why I was so upset, just that I was. We were supposed to be in this together, yet he was keeping things from me. My own mother had known about us, and he hadn’t told me. Who else knew?

“I’ve got to go, Mom.”

“Brock, wait—” But I was already on my way out the door.

As I walked around looking for Joshua, I tried to act normal. Tried to smile. Tried to respond when someone asked me a question. I had no idea if I was successful. I had no idea what I said. All I could think about was finding Joshua. I found him in the living room next to the fireplace. He was talking to Ben, and they were laughing. Were they laughing at me? I shook my head. I was overreacting.

Ben noticed me first. “Hey, Brock.”

Joshua turned, a smile on his face, but it fell when he saw me. I grabbed his arm. “Hi, Ben. Good to see you. I’m borrowing Joshua.” All of that was announced as I dragged Joshua away.

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