Page 63 of The Hang Up

“Adam Wainwright.”

He tilted his head. “The St. Louis pitcher?”

I nodded. “Remember when you took us to the game?”

He scratched at the stubble on his jaw, and I wanted to pull his hand away and rub my cheek against the bristles. Hold him in my arms. Kiss away the worry in his eyes. I’d been standing there for less than five minutes, and every part of me wanted to be alone with him. Preferably naked. It was his party. Couldn’t he make everyone leave?

“Don’t look at me like that, Brock. Not in a room full of people. And not until you explain what a trip we took when you were ten—Jesus, I’m ancient—has to do with anything.”

“Own it. That’s what you told me that day. Be confident in your choices.”

He smiled fondly at me. “You were so nervous.”

“That’s me. Nervous. About every fucking thing.”

“Will you hate me if I tell you I think it’s cute?”

I turned us around so my back was to the rest of the party. I wanted to grab his face, but I settled for holding his gaze so he could see the truth in my eyes. “This is me. Being confident in my choices. I want you, Joshua. I’ve always wanted you. Even if it’s just short-term. Just a little while. Even—” I took a shaky breath. “Even if you can’t come out.”

Joshua swallowed, and I could see the conflicting emotions on his face. Want. Fear…and love? But that might have been me seeing what I wanted to see. “You’re so good and sweet. I’m not sure I deserve you…”

I looked down, fiddling with the buttons on his shirt. “Sean says I have daddy issues, because my dad was never around.”

He tipped my chin and studied me. “Why are we talking about my son?”

Heat spread over my cheeks. God. “What if that’s the reason—I mean—if I need a Daddy—”

He leaned in so only I could hear him. “Brock, sweetheart, if you think that’s going to deter me, you’ve seriously misjudged the situation.”

I glanced down, and I could see the truth in his words.

“Is that for me?” I asked, giving him a look from under my lashes.

“Brat,” he growled. And for a moment, I thought he might kiss me. Right there in the middle of his party. Where anyone could see us.

“Hey, guys, we’re ready,” Matthew said, stepping into the hallway. We both nodded, and then he was off again.

“When everyone is gone,” he said, his husky voice not helping my situation at all, “you’re getting the spanking you deserve.”

“Promise?”

CHAPTER15

Joshua

The fightwith Brock had shaken me up. Why was I still pushing him away? I wasn’t sure I could go on without him in my life. It had been wrong not to tell him about his mom. I’d been called controlling much of my life, and I’d never really thought of it that way. I was trying to do what I thought was best for the people I loved. But Brock didn’t need me to make choices for him. After the fight, I went about the party pretending nothing was wrong, and, for the most part, nobody noticed. Except for one person.

“What’s up, boss man?”

“You’re not on the clock right now, Mitch. No need to manage me. Just enjoy yourself.”

He glanced up at the ceiling as if the answers were written there. “As if I can enjoy myself with you brooding.”

“I’m not—”

He waved his hand at me. “I just saw Brock. He was very upset. What happened?”

“I don’t think that’s any of your business.”

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