Page 39 of 12 Gays of Christmas

He raises his eyebrows a few times. “If you’re good, you’ll get to find out.”

I ignore him and eat my hot dog. It’s good but not enough. Thankfully, he brings out more. There are also chips and a thermos of hot chocolate.

“You’re one surprising guy, Remi.”

“That’s my goal in life. To be things no one else expects. And you, my friend, are the opposite. You try very hard to be exactly what everyone expects.”

“I do not.”

“You pretend you’re not smart. That you don’t like history or art. You’re willing to throw away the best chance you have because you don’t want to be a twenty-three-year-old virgin.”

I swallow the hot dog in my mouth, trying to keep it from lodging itself in my throat. “Best chance at what?”

“Colin likes you.”

“No, he doesn’t. I mean, he likes me, but not like likes me.” My brain decides to remind me of the taste of Colin’s lips. The dazed look on his face. The way he pulled me closer. But what if I’m wrong? What if Remi is wrong? He was obviously wrong about some things because they broke up.

“What about you?”

“What do you mean?” I don’t look at him. I’m afraid I know what he means. It isn’t a question I want to answer.

“Do you like him?”

“This might be the weirdest date I’ve ever been on.”

“You said that already. Get over it. Do you have a huge crush on your roommate? Do you want to do the deed with him? Are you in looove with him?”

I close my eyes. I don’t want to answer any of those questions.

“Then let’s do it. Punch that V-card. Get it out of the way. Then you can focus on what you really want.”

What he says makes sense. I mean, I trust Remi in a way. “Come here.” He tugs the blanket he wrapped around me and pulls me toward him. He leans in, and I realize he’s going to kiss me.

Do I want that? I’m curious, but before our lips touch, I pull back. “I can’t.”

He nods. “I know. But the thing you have to ask yourself, Gil, is whether you can’t with me or anyone. Or anyone who isn’t Colin. And you’re the only one who can answer that.”

DAY NINE: THURSDAY AND THE ART LOVER NO HIMBO

DECEMBER 21

COLIN

“Why are you sulking?”

I glance at the clock over the sink and then at the chalkboard whereSerious Dudeis still not crossed out. My gaze returns to my annoying sister scowling at me through the screen. “I’m not.”

“It’s four days until Christmas, and you’re grumpier than the Grinch before his heart grows three times its size. If you’re miserable, just come home. I hate that you’re not here.”

“I have stuff to do.”

“I’m not dumb. I know why you’re still there.”

She has my full focus now. “Nat, there’s all—”

“Nope.” She grins, showing off her perfect teeth. Last Christmas, she still had braces. Red and green. She’s growing up, and I’m missing it. “If you’re worried about Gil being alone, bring him.” She hesitates and then adds, “You’re a good friend, Colin.”

I try to hide my relief. She’s right. Not exactly, but close enough. “Gil has football stuff. I’ll invite him, but don’t get your hopes up. He might have things to do.” Or people to do if he finds a date and loses his cherry. And he might not want to go home with me. He might want to hang out with his new guy instead. That doesn’t settle right in my stomach. I need to get over this crush.

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