Page 94 of The Lucky Escape

She nodded but went reluctantly, knowing she was about to miss the action.

Mum went to follow Dad through to the kitchen, but I held out an arm and stopped her.

‘I’m not being melodramatic, Mum,’ I said. ‘Don’t dismiss my feelings that way. You can either be nice today, or go for a walk and come back when we’re finished, okay? It’s your call.’

‘Annie,’ she said. ‘I’m your mother. Don’t talk to me that way.’

I lowered my voice, because if I didn’t consciously do that I would shout. ‘No, Mum. Don’tyoutalk tomethat way. I’m sick of it. I am a grown woman and I am proud of who I am, especially after everything I’ve been through. You can either respect that or … I don’t know what the alternative is. But at least for today can you just be supportive please? I don’t have the energy to fight.’

‘Yes,’ she said in a small voice. ‘Oh, Annie. I don’t know why it’s so hard for us to get along.’

‘Because,’ I replied, my teeth gritted, ‘it’s as if you don’t even like me.’

‘Of course Ilikeyou, darling!’ she replied. ‘Of course I do! You just … confuse me, most of the time. It’s so frustrating to watch somebody as clever and talented as you hide under a bushel.’

Mum thought I was talented?

‘That’s not the way I hear it,’ I said. ‘You constantly nag at me. You pick at me. You belittle me!’

‘It’s not nagging, Annie. That’s me caring. I think you’re a remarkable young woman. I just wish you’d … I don’tknow. You can be very wet, a lot of the time. Find your backbone! I know it comes out clumsily, but that’s all I mean …’

‘Coming through!’ Dad said, barrelling towards the front door with a big box in his hands. ‘Watch yourselves!’

‘Me too!’ said Freddie. ‘Suitcases on wheels coming through!’

‘Whoa!’ I squealed. ‘The front door isn’t even open. Hold on!’

I opened the door and took Dad’s keys from his back pocket so I could open the van. Mum came outside and said to me: ‘I love you, Annie. I’ll do better, okay? I know we don’t always see eye-to-eye. But I want to. I do love you, you know. I’m going to change. Let’s make today nice for you.’ I was so taken aback I just nodded, accepting her hug. I couldn’t remember the last time she’d hugged me. My whole life we’d had friction, and now I’d stood up for myself she’d explained why? Wow. I’d just made more progress with her in three minutes than I thought I could in a lifetime.

I wish I could debrief with Patrick like this,I thought.

I hated that I’d probably lost him. I’d still not seen him. I was convinced we were doing a slow fizzle out. I was convinced we weren’t in the process of breaking up so much as already broken up, and I just hadn’t caught up to the fact.

‘Annie?’ Mum prompted, and I moved to help her with another box.

It took us forty-five minutes to pack up the house, and the three of them waited outside as I did one last check of the place to make sure I hadn’t forgotten anything. My phone buzzed and Adzo told me she was thinking of me. I texted her back to say thank you, along with an invitation for pizza and bubbles later that night. I walked through all the roomsone last time and decided everything was fine, and then closed the front door.

It didn’t take us long to unload the van at the other end, by which time it was lunch and Mum and Dad went off in search of food, taking the dog with them. Freddie and I said we’d be good with sandwiches, Mum said she needed something with a higher nutritional value, and Dad said he was really in the market for a Sprite, but only the one with no added sugar, so Freddie stayed with me as I tried to find the box with the plates and cutlery and Mum and Dad said they’d be back soon.

‘Froogle, can you open that box over there?’ I said. ‘The white one, not the big brown one.’

‘Uh-huh,’ she replied.

I busied myself sorting through the boxes Dad had piled in the living room despite the fact they very clearly said ‘bedroom’ or ‘bathroom’ on them, and when I came back, Freddie was sat with my memory box.

‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘It fell open and now I can’t stop looking at all these photos.’

On the very top were some of the snaps I’d printed of Australia – just my favourites of me and Patrick. Freddie took a breath and instantly I knew she was about to say something I wouldn’t like. I could tell by how quiet she’d grown that she was building up to it.

‘Hey,’ I said. ‘I really am sorry I’ve not been a very good big sister. But now I’m moved in here, you can come and stay whenever you want. Literally, that alcove there should have a ‘Freddie’s Room’ sign hanging down.’

‘Yeah,’ she said. ‘Okay.’

‘Freddie-Bug?’

‘I feel sad that you and Patrick are breaking up. I liked him. He looked at you like you were the most important person in the world. I don’t think you should.’

‘Oh,’ I said. I took the photos from her hand and looked at them myself. There was no denying the size of my smile in most of them. ‘It was time for me to be an independent woman, Frou. A single gal.’

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