Page 104 of One Night With You

‘A few things,’ I tell him. ‘Two projects in development: one in pre-production to start filming in the autumn, another pretty much ready to go. Directed one, wrote and directed the other.’

‘Jesus,’ he says. ‘Ever hear of doing one thing at a time?’

I shrug. ‘Doesn’t work like that,’ I say. ‘Plus, you know … Of course I’m terrified it will all go away. And I once walked away from the best man I’ve ever known in the name of my own creativity, so … I try to make it count.’

I turn around so I’m not forward-facing anymore, flipping to rest my back against the bar instead. I can’t believe I just said that. I didn’t even know I thought that. I take a beat. Is it true, what I just told him? I realise, with a startling clarity, that it is.

‘And does it?’ he asks, softly, as if I haven’t just lit the fuse on a bomb about to go off.

‘Does it count? I mean, I’m enjoying myself, yeah. It’s a lot. Harry thinks I’m mad and need to slow down a bit, but he’s got Beau and Mirabelle. I’ve got …’

I don’t know what I’ve got.

‘Everything you ever wanted?’ Nic supplies. I can’t look at him. I don’t know what’s happening. What I’ve tried to hold together for such a long time is unravelling, dropped toilet paper spooling out away from the cardboard roll.

‘What about you?’ I change the subject. ‘I’m boring. Tell me about your life.’

‘Me?’ he repeats. ‘Same old, really. Lila starts school, like I said. Millie and Sandeep had another kid, so she’s got a brother, whom she loves until she doesn’t. I think she likes that she’s got me, who she doesn’t have to share. And then she misses him and wants to see him again.’

‘Cute,’ I say.

‘I dated a bit, even got pretty serious with one woman, but … well, it didn’t work out.’

‘I’m sorry,’ I say, and I mean it. I want him to be happy.

‘I’m not,’ he says. ‘Not really.’

‘How’s your brother?’ I ask. ‘Candice passed along the details about him and Jackson. I hardly see Jackson, but when we do it’s like no time has passed at all.’

‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘He’s good. Happy. Happier than I’ve ever known him, truth told.’

‘That’s nice.’

‘Yeah.’ He nods. ‘And Candice? Jackson said she was getting married?’

‘Got married,’ I say. ‘Last weekend. On her honeymoon now. I don’t know if you remember, but our postman? She finally made her move.’

‘I remember,’ Nic says.

‘I’m surprised you’re not telling me that you remember everything. Wasn’t that your line?’

‘It was never a line,’ he says, deadpan. ‘And for what it’s worth, I do.’

I finally look at him. He’s smiling with half of his mouth, just like always.

‘God,’ I tell him. ‘It’s so weird seeing you. Good weird, but …’

‘But misty watercolour memories?’ he says, quoting lyrics from the Barbra Streisand song.

‘Of the way we were,’ I say, supplying the song’s title. ‘Exactly.’

‘Work good?’ I ask.

‘Work’s fine. Living in Liverpool is fine. Lila is fine.’

‘So what you’re saying is?’

‘It’s weird seeing you too.’ He smirks. ‘Good weird, but …’

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