Page 43 of Love at First Sight

‘Is he the one with the …’ She motions overhead, a gesture that meansreally bad hair piece.

‘He is,’ I say, and she breezily replies, ‘I’ll leave it then,’ and we burst out laughing.

‘At least you’ve got Stray Kids to get your teeth into,’ India points out, rifling through a rail of fake-fur stoles. ‘I’m just so chuffed for you. I don’t love Cal – although I am desperate to actually meet him, obviously – but I do know that he’s been helpful. Sometimes we need people outside our immediate circle to push us to do new things, and if that’s what he’s been for you, then great, sold. Excellent.’

‘It suddenly feels so real though,’ I say. We’ve ended up in a vintage store on Argyll Street. I’m holding up a floral tea dress which would be gorgeous for something, but not the wedding.

‘How so?’

‘I have to set myself up as a community project, get a bank account so they can give me the money, and then my only stipulation thereafter is a financial report sent to them in six months, and again in a year. Which I take to mean, there had better have been activity within six months. As in, now five months and three weeks and a few days? Tick tock …’

‘What’s Ali said?’ India asks.

I don’t say anything.

‘Jessie,’ she intones. ‘What’s Ali said?’

I grimace. ‘I haven’t told her yet,’ I admit.

I can tell India disapproves. She’s always known I’ve been hesitant to tell Ali anything about my Stray Kids idea because I know exactly how she will react, and it won’t be positive.

‘What if she fires me?’ I say. ‘I want to keep looking after Henry as well as developing Stray Kids – I mean, lord knows I have the time. But I know she’ll be weird about it, get funny, and probably look to replace me before I can quit, which I would never do. I love Henry! Henry and Ali are family!’

India puts down the lace shawl she’s been eyeing.

‘If Ali fires you for something that has nothing to do with her, she’s an arse,’ she says. ‘She reckons she’s your friend, thatyouare family, but then she plays these power games that mean you’re not going to tell her about this huge new thing in your life? Nah, not cool.’

‘Iwilltell her,’ I protest. ‘Now I’ve got the funding approved. I want to be able to share it with Henry too, you know? And half his school are my target market, so the other parents will hopefully get involved soon enough …’

India looks at me sympathetically. ‘I’m sure she won’t fire you,’ she says, more softly this time. ‘She might be annoyed if she feels like you’ve got a split focus, but you’ll just have to prove you can do both things at once, and then she’ll calm down.’

‘We’re looking at mere weeks until opening,’ I say. ‘Once the paperwork is square I need a location, volunteers, help getting the word out there … This is all happening so fast.’

India pulls a face. ‘Not really, doll,’ she counters. ‘You’ve wanted this for years. The whole plan has been in your head, perfectly formed, it’s just now you have an external source of accountability. It’s normal to freakout, but I promise you, everyone wants you to succeed and we’re all here to support you and help you. Cross my heart. And I’ll do your marketing, pro bono. It’s my zone of genius, after all.’

‘Since when did you become a life coach?’ I ask, amused. ‘You’re saying all the right things, you know.’

‘Don’t sound so surprised!’ India laughs. ‘Anyway. I’m too tall for this, but I think you should try it on.’

She hands me a midaxi-length petrol-coloured silk slip of a thing, and pushes me into the changing room.

‘Yes, oh wise one.’ I say. She gives me the finger.

Ali has been away four nights now, and just like I do every night once Henry is in bed, I text her with an update.

Hey Ali, I type.All good here – Henry loves sending you the videos, and watching your videos back in the mornings. He misses you, but he’s doing okay! We’re having a fun time! One more thing: I just wanted to let you know that I’ve got funding for a kids’ club in the local area. It won’t impact my looking after Henry or anything like that, but I have to act fast to fall in line with the rules of the grant, so just giving you a heads-up! Sorry to do so whilst you’re away, but wanted you to hear it from me asap! Xxxx

My heart races as I hit send, but I do it, like the big brave girl I am. Just kidding. I could throw up I’m so nervous.

Then, because I bought the petrol-coloured silk dress for the wedding, I decide to pull the trigger and call Dad. Simone normally has gigs in the week, so if I’m going to catch him when she’s not around, tonight’s the night.

He picks up after almost eight rings.

‘Oh!’ I say, once he does. ‘I didn’t think you were going to answer!’

‘Hello, Jessie,’ he says, voice sombre. ‘I wondered when we’d hear from you.’

We.He wonders whenwewould hear? Kill me now.

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