“Yes!” I shouted. I was still straddling him, his hands resting on my hips.
I felt his fingers fisting against me and the tension rolling off his body. Still, despite the anger I was unleashing on him, his cock was twitching against my pussy.
“I survived! It’s over. Now, I want to thrive, not just endure.”
I was practically begging him to understand me.
“I decided long ago to avoid fixating on the assault. If I hadn’t, the darkness would have consumed me. Don’t you understand? I need you to stop dwelling on it as well! You weren’t even there! You must let go so we can create a fulfilling life together, a true life filled with passion. The kind of passion I long for!”
“No, Calista!” His voice thundered as he cupped my face, his grip firm and earnest. His eyes, wide and fierce, locked onto mine, pleading for understanding. “I’ve never seen you as damaged or broken! I only want to keep you safe, no matter what! That’s what a good husband does!”
I couldn’t take it any longer.
I couldn’t be close to him any longer.
Frustration mounted in my veins, leaving me pulsingwith anger and rage. Tears welled in my eyes, and I blinked them away. No fucking way was I going to cry now.
It would only prove his point.
I pushed off him, my feet crashing against the floor, echoing the weight of my frustration. I fixed my gaze on him, the tempest of anger and desperation boiling inside me as I fought for my voice amidst the chaos of my emotions.
“Fuck off with your protection! I have a right to choose what I want.”
I abruptly pivoted toward the door. I craved space. I wanted to escape his pity and narrow mindset.
“Cali!” he shouted from behind me. I ignored him and kept walking to the door.
But he sprang to his feet and jumped in front of me, grabbing my arms and capturing my gaze.
“I will never be a part of hurting you, Calista, I just can’t. You have to understand. Please.”
“No!” I protested. “You know what I understand, Leon? I understand that a woman has sexual needs, just like a man does. I can feel the distance between us, that invisible wall you’ve built, and it’s suffocating. You’re holding back, thinking you’re protecting me, but that gnawing hunger inside you just keeps growing, festering like an untreated wound. Until it pushes you to seek what you want from someone else. I’m willing to give it to you, and you deny me.”
I glared, each word slicing the charged air.
“I would never,” he whispered.
“Why should I believe you?” I demanded, strugglingagainst his grip. He held on tightly, his chocolate eyes searching mine.
He opened his mouth, then closed it.
And then a slow smile spread across his face, as if he’d just figured out something important.
“Because I love you, Calista, that’s why.” His words stung. They dug deep and hit hard.
And they made absolutely no sense to me.
The anger bubbling inside me rushed to the surface, overwhelming me now.
“How dare you?” I hissed.
Surprise flashed across his face, his confusion evident, and it pissed me off even more.
“How dare you say such a thing when you only give me pieces of yourself?”
“What?” he asked. “That’s not true. I am completely present with you!”
“Present?” I questioned. “Maybe partially. I want you, all of you! Not just nice Leon. Not just gentle Leon. I want passionate, primal Leon!”