Page 21 of Broken Alpha

I turned to Luke to find him staring at me, focusing on my words. His hand had slipped into mine, our fingers intertwining. He said nothing, allowing me to explain why I was in his class. Taking his class had been by chance, something I had done for me. I couldn’t get over how well chance or fate lined up perfectly for me for last night even to happen. I took a sip of coffee before continuing.

“Your class wasn’t on the list for my degree that the advisor gave me. Erik wants to be a psychologist, which is why he’s taking it. I remember reading the syllabus and summary of your class in the handbook, and I decided to take the class for myself. I knew how the Omega brain worked, but I wanted to see it explained from an Alpha’s point of view. I thought that if I took the class, I could better understand how the world sees us and how I could use that to help those I’d be in charge of. Prepare them better for a world where they’re viewed as a hindrance to society and lesser than others. The majority of the world thinks the way Betas and Alphas do of us Omegas, as nothing more than weak baby factories, so I wanted to see what the biology and psychology of it being taught by an Alpha would be like.”

“And?” Luke asked. There was an odd look on his face, one that I couldn’t place. I could tell he was holding his breath, worried about how I would critique his class and inadvertently judge him. I gripped his hand tightly, giving him a soft smile.

“I expected you to be aggressive in teaching. Most Alphas are and do, in fact, push the narrative that we’re the weaker beings and should spend our lives in submission. There are some people in the world who believe that if you go into heat at seventeen, then you’re old enough to find a pack and start breeding, regardless of the age of consent. It’s been a fight in the Supreme Court for nearly a decade, and with more and more presenting earlier than expected, it’s become a hot topic. So imagine my surprise when I found a class taught by someone unbiased who treated designations as equals and spent the same amount of time on both sides. You allow fair debates, and you teach in a way that makes us think and even open the floor to critical thinking. Even if a silly Alpha didn’t appreciate an Omega stepping in. I don’t know why your class wasn’t offered to me, and I’m trying not to take it personally. I’m trying not to think it’s because I was an Omega. This is just a long way of saying that I’m happy I’m in your class. I don’t know what the future will be for us, but for now, I’m happy.”

“I wanted to teach the facts, even if it went against the common belief. I don’t know if I believe in fate either, despite the fact that I’ve been thinking more and more about fated mates. I don’t know if I believe in the idea; it’s one I've never entertained. But you being in my classroom, you echo every fear and worry that I possess as well, and me being who I am, it just makes too much sense. It’s too coincidental. I’m not saying that to rush anything or force you into an uncomfortable position. I want to take our time still, but everything's adding up in ways I never thought possible.”

“What do you mean ‘me being who I am’?” I tilted my head, turning to look at Luke directly. He bowed his head, avoiding my eyes.

“Unlike you, my parents didn’t know what my designation was at birth, though it was assumed I would be an Alpha, considering our family line. There hasn’t been an Omega born in my family in centuries, but I was tested at puberty like everyone else. It came with dominant markers, but I hadn’t presented appropriately yet. Once I started college, I noticed something was off, and by society standards, I’m essentially broken.” He took a breath before glancing at me, but his eyes didn’t meet mine. “Until the day you entered my classroom, I had never scented an Omega. I can’t tell the designations apart, everyone smells like a Beta to me.”

I blinked at him, processing what he was saying. All my life, I could detect the pheromones of an Alpha. But to present and not know if the person beside you was an Omega or a Beta…I couldn’t tell if that was a blessing or a curse. However, now I understand the hesitancy behind his movements around me. I was the only person that produced a scent for him, so he didn’t want to scare me off and lose his only experience. It explained why he kept rubbing his face and nose on my neck when we hugged and breathed deeply because it was something so new. Something he could finally experience.

“So…last night when you said you had never knotted someone, it was because you never produced a knot?” I asked carefully.

“Until you, I have never produced a knot. I had a partner leave me in college because I couldn’t give him what he needed.” He looked at me then. “I was so worried that I couldn’t be what you needed either. Plus, how we’re acquainted certainly didn’t help matters. Teachers can’t be with their students. But you were the first knot that mattered.”

“Mattered?” I tilted my head. “You just said that you had never produced a knot until last night.”

“Mmmm, technically correct,” he laughed, his cheeks turning a deep crimson. “I told you I had to take care of myself after your heat. I, uh, ended up being stuck to a sleeve I was using. You were the cause.”

I tried not to laugh. I really, really did. This was a serious conversation, and I needed to be understanding and kind, yet I couldn’t stop the laughter from inside me. Luke’s blush deepened, but he smiled at me anyway. “Why didn’t you knot me this morning?”

Luke’s cheeks flushed an even deeper red. “I wanted to, Lord help me, I wanted to. But I was worried you would be too sore; as a dominant, my knot is bigger. The position we were in would’ve made it more difficult, though not impossible, I just didn’t want to hurt you. And I didn’t know if we had the time to be stuck together again.”

That made a lot of sense to me, easing the underlying fear that had settled in my stomach from the lack of his knot this morning. I hopped off my stool, spinning him toward me to place myself between his legs, and kissed him. Our kiss tasted of eggs and coffee, and I couldn’t help the feeling of domestication again.

“You’re not broken, Luke. But that toy will be if you ever knot it instead of me again.”

This time, he laughed, pulling me close and nuzzling my neck before kissing my collarbone. “I promise never to knot anything but you again.”

“Good boy.”

I was fully aware I was being a fucking brat. I was on edge, fidgety, pissy, and snapping at Erik over the stupidest shit. I was being an asshole, but I couldn’t seem to stop. I wanted Luke. I hated that our time together was so short, and now I was pissed that Erik was sitting next to me on the couch instead of him. It was Sunday night, and I still had yet to shower, refusing to wash his scent from me. Instead, I was curled into the corner of the couch, under a throw blanket, wrapped in the cardigan I had stolen from Luke. Erik sat a cushion down from me, opting not to be so close after I snapped at him earlier. He was focused on his fried rice with beef and broccoli. The latest episode of some superhero show playing on the TV, but I couldn’t focus. I hadn’t been able to focus since coming back to the apartment. I had even attempted to read the book Luke bought for me, but my attention span couldn’t absorb the words, and I kept reading the same sentence repeatedly before I finally gave up. The pocket of the cardigan vibrated, and I pulled out my phone, unlocking it to read the text message that came through while another two followed it.

I didn’t leave my bed until late afternoon.

It still smells like you. It makes my dick hard and my heart ache.

I miss you. Is it too soon to say that?

I put the sweet and sour pork container onto the coffee table before texting out a reply to Luke, smiling down at my screen.

I can’t bring myself to shower yet. I’m wearing your cardigan, and I miss you too. Keep those balls full for me?

I don’t know if I can completely prevent myself from self-pleasure, especially when thoughts of you invade my dreams, but for you, I shall try.

I can’t wait to suck on those full balls.

You’re lucky Mr. Harllow is there right now; otherwise, I’d come and use that teasing mouth of yours.

I don’t view that as ‘lucky,’ Sir. That is the very definition of ‘unlucky.’

Fuck, I love that you called me sir. I eagerly await when we can be together again.

As much as I enjoyed your cock in me, I can’t wait until I can feel your arms around me again.

---