Page 11 of Bear In Mind

“I assure you I haven’t.”

Stepping out of my grip completely, she gave me a small smile.“You’re a good man, Bear, but I don’t want you doing anymore than you already have for me.”She finally met my gaze.

Electricity crackled down my spine, jolting me.For one brief second, I swore I saw longing in her depths.Bitterness warred inside me.I understood why she was pushing me away, but I wasn’t prepared for it.How the hell could I be so naïve?I assumed when the time was right that she would run to me and I’d be waiting with open arms.For five years, I kept her at arm’s length while she finished school.Not once did I let the professional wall slip.

Until now.

But she had five years of disinterest engrained in her.Of course she didn’t expect anything.Of course she was prepared to walk away.Because in five years, I’d declared nothing.I’d been an idiot.I didn’t think it through to this scenario back then.

Was right now really the best time?No.She’d suffered a traumatic event.Even though she didn’t remember what happened, the signs were there.The emotional ramifications were clear as day.

But I couldn’t do it; things couldn’t go back to the way they were.

Crossing her arms over her chest, she swallowed.“Can I please borrow your phone for a minute?”She shifted uneasily.

I knew it wasn’t rational, I knew it wasn’t the right time, but I snapped.My bear panicked.I panicked.And five years of patience went out the window.I couldn’t wait anymore.I couldn’t let her leave unprotected.We needed to mark her.The urge was primal.It was rooted deep in my gut and seconded by my bear.It wouldn’t be as strong as mating with her and fully claiming her.It would tie me to her with no chance at love with another woman forever.

I didn’t care, though.I refused to risk her life again.Last night could never happen again; it would never happen again.Determination vibrated through me.“No.”

She whipped to attention.“No?”

Shaking my head negatively, I reiterated my denial.“No.”

I closed the distance between us in one stride.“I know you don’t remember what happened last night, but something bad could have happened and it would have been my fault.And I know you won’t understand what I’m about to say, but you need to know the truth.”

Concern furrowed her brows.She angled her brown eyes directly at mine, and every ounce of unease was visible in them.Wordlessly, she nodded her head, stiffening as if to brace herself.

For the first time ever, my confidence was rattled.I’d always been levelheaded, the rational one.I listened more than I spoke.I observed, calculated, thoroughly thought through everything before responding in most situations.But five years of rational came to a head last night, morphing into five years of pent up desperation.I was cracking.The thought of losing her broke open the haunting darkness her permanent loss would cause me, and I was hyperaware of every misstep over the years.

Fuck!

Sucking in a rugged breath, I cupped her face tenderly, aware of my strength and her fragility.“This is going to sound crazy, illogical, improbable and potentially inconceivable, but I will prove it.Okay?”

She didn’t move, yet she lost a bit of her warmth.“Okay.”Her voice was barely a whisper.

My stomach knotted.My bear stilled, preparing to take over the second I let my guard down.My heart beat faster as the weight of my truth hit me; no human was ever prepared to hear it.

A snarl rumbled in my chest.I hated this.I wanted to jump to the part where I claimed her.“Last night should never have happened, Bryn.”I kept my voice calm and steady.“I’m a shifter, a bear shifter to be exact, and you’re my mate.I’ve known since the minute I met you.Had I pursued you early on, you would have been protected.That guy wouldn’t have been able to slip you something without every shifter at that bar stepping in to save you.If I hadn’t-“ I closed my eyes, trying to breathe through my anguish.I was pissed off, at myself, at the twerp, at the situation in general.I’d majorly fucked everything up.

My muscles vibrated as my bear tested me, springing upwards and clawing at my surface.I was forced to take a step back, unwilling to put her at risk.

My hands balled at my side, I flexed, trying to alleviate the mounting pressure, the physical strain of my bear seeking freedom.Blowing out a breath, I faced her again.“If I hadn’t been there last night, who knows what he would have done.”My lips curled in disgust.“Who knows what he would have donetoyou.”A growl escaped me, echoing loudly.

To her credit, she didn’t flinch.Her eyes widened and her right hand tightened around her left bicep, but she didn’t react.

“Five years ago, staying away made sense.I didn’t want to keep you from pursuing your dreams.But that was a mistake.I see that now.”I squeezed the back of my neck, as if to pinch my bear’s scruff.“I can’t let you leave until I know last night will never happen again.I can let you live the life you want with anyone you choose, so long as I know you’re safe.”My heart sprinted in my chest, each beat akin to a hammer hitting my ribcage, as I stared at her, as I waited.Every second that ticked by felt like a lifetime because I knew what she said next would shape our futures forever.

Chapter Nine

Bryn

My heart sunk.At first, bypassing whether I believed the shifter part or not, he was admitting to wanting me since the day we met.Or so I thought.The more he kept talking, a new truth was revealed: he had a hero complex the size of Metropolis.He didn’t care who I was with, so long as nothing happened to me.For some reason, he felt responsible for me.

Darn it!Tears stung my eyes as I fixated on the hardwood floor.My throat constricted as my emotions clutter my senses.I hated that I was about to cry.I hated that his words, what his words unveiled, hurt.I hated that he had a hold on me.No man should have this power.The only reason he had it was because I’d given it to him.I’d given it to Darren and now to Bear.When would I learn?

“You can’t control the uncontrollable, Bear.I could get an incurable disease tomorrow and there would be nothing anyone could do.”Peering up at him, all I saw was disdain.

His expression intensified.His brows slid into a single line of anger.His jaw was clamped tight; his teeth gritted.His nostrils flared with every huffy breath.His upper lip curled ever so slightly in disgust.His hands remained fisted at his sides.His muscles seemed to be pulsating, like he was clenching and unclenching them.Tension bound every inch of his frame as he glared at me.

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