Page 51 of What I Should Have Felt

Lying on my bed, her eyes were closed with her head tipped back slightly upon the pillow, and her chest rose and fell with each panting gasp for air. One hand was hidden beneath the quilt as her other fingers tightened their grip on the sheets.

The door behind me quietly swung closed with a soft plunk, drowned out by the fan in the corner of my room. Her chest heaved faster, as her lashes fluttered with the rhythmical movement of her hand beneath the blankets.

She was not asleep. She was…

Shit. I shouldn’t be here. I’d just walked in on Colette during some very personal time.

Her chest rose again, and a quiet moan left her lips. The sound—one word.

My name.

Chapter 22

COLETTE

Sweat coated my skin as I gave in to the very desire that had woken me from my sleep.

Even in my dreams, Ford had occupied every thought, every decision that I made. I’d finally found my safety and peace again. After all this time alone, I could love again and be in love with someone I never thought I’d get a chance with again.

Despite being so stubborn and such a hardened ass to him, he’d still found a way to protect me, and damn was it fucking hot. It finally dawned on me that he wasn’t just a non-confrontational person at all costs growing up; he simply preferred to not have things escalate if they didn’t have to, but he certainly would go to the ends of the earth to protect me if he needed to.

I could fight and handle shit on my own, but the way he took charge aroused feelings in me I’d long since written off as something I wasn’tdeserving of again. It made me feel vulnerable and safe at the same time, soft and feminine. But empowered more than ever before.

The way he’d touched me, guided me last night, took control had left me hot, bothered, and slightly embarrassed that I’d interrupted it by crying. But instead of making a big deal about it, or making me feel like some idiot, he’d held me and let me process all the shit that had happened.

Now here I was, unable to think of anything else except for Ford. It was his body I imagined against mine. I pictured his hands tracing every curve, and his touch against me. It was his lips I fantasized taking mine. I whimpered and let out a quiet moan with his name sliding off my tongue. Oh, that felt so fucking good. It was his handsome face hovering above mine. His intense gaze watching me with hunger by the door in the room.

Those beautiful eyes stared—

Every muscle in my body stiffened, freezing in place as if a blizzard had swept into this room. My heart skipped a beat as my gaze locked onto his.

Not a fantasy.

Not some picture or idea. But the actual him.

Ford stood as still as if he were made of stone directly in front of the closed and definitely locked door of the bedroom. His eyes were dark and remained firmly on me, and his chest barely moved.

My belly swirled warm, the arousal heightening as I couldn’t help but notice the massive bulge between his legs. I wondered how long he’d been standing there. How long he’d been watching…

Slowly, I slid my hand out from between my legs and pushed myself upright. The heat from my figure was palpable, and my heart quickened as his eyes darted to my fingers that I pulled out from beneath the sheets.

His tongue flicked across his lips as his chest heaved with a breath he’d been holding. Did he want…?

Better question, did I want that?

The answer was easy and quick, yes, I fucking wanted that from him. Cautiously, I brought my hands to my lap, wondering how to tell him without—

And fingers wrapped around my wrist just before they brushed against the sheets.

A calloused, massive hand stopped me, and my eyes locked onto Ford’s face, hovering so close to mine. He’d crossed that room so deathly silent and fast that I nearly fell over backward. But he wasn’t looking at me, he was watching my fingers with the hungriest stare I’d ever seen.

Every thought disappeared from my mind, and a fire roared low in my belly as he brought my fingers to his mouth. When he was done, he slowly dropped my wrist and pulled the sheets off the rest of my body. He grabbed my pajama shorts and thong, dragging them off at the same time he latched onto my leg and slid me to the edge of the mattress.

Without a word, he knelt down in front of me and draped my legs over his shoulders. I gasped, and his hand found my throat. He locked eyes with me and shook his head in warning to be quiet. I nodded fervently, shock and excitement coursing through me as he winked, kept his gaze steady with mine, and dove between my legs.

The world could be burning down around me, and I wouldn’t have noticed. There was nothing else going on, not a rational cautionary thought as heat and sweat rolled beneath my skin. If he trusted that no oneelse knew how to open that door while it was locked to be able to indulge the way he was, then I let myself give in.

I had absolutely abstained, been celibate, for years, and all of that blew to the wind because of this man. This wasn’t going to take long as everything in me seared hot with each wave of desire. I knew I’d want this. No, Ihadto have this again. And soon, as every pulse in my body drove me closer and closer to a wild cliff. This should not be happening. The consequences of the aftermath were either going to be very good or catastrophic, but I didn’t give a rat’s ass as of this moment. All I wanted was this. Him. This singular moment, as pleasure enveloped my world in stars and vibrant colors finally provided me with the explosion I craved.

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