Page 52 of His Hot Mess

“How’s she doing?” I asked.

Sadie didn’t say anything so I opened my eyes and looked over at her. She was scrolling through her texts. Then she huffed and lowered the phone.

“Hey,” I said, sitting up. “You okay?”

“I’m fine.” She was twiddling with the phone, rolling it over and over again in her hands.

“You don’t look fine.”

She dropped her phone in her lap and folded her arms across her chest, the sheet tangled up with it. She stared at the black rectangle on the bed as if it were a dog that had tried to bite her.

“You and Lucy get in a fight or something?” I asked.

“No,” she spat. “I mean yes. But whatever, it’s not important.”

“You want to talk about it?”

She glared at me. “No, I don’t want to fucking talk about it, okay?”

I raised my eyebrows, and she lowered hers.

“Are you always so fucking calm? Do other people never bother you?”

The truth was yes, I was usually calm. Until I wasn’t.

What was it about being with Sadie that made my brain want to pull up the very worst memories I had with Jessica? Was it some comparison thing?

A vision of a garden gnome—the one Jessica held in her arms in that photo in the album—flashed in my mind, making my stomach clench.

I wouldn’t relive that memory. Not today. Not now.

“We shouldn't have looked at our phones," I said, closing my eyes again, as if I could will away the cold feeling of dread nipping at my neck.

“We shouldn't have done this at all,” she replied.

The clack of Sadie’s phone hitting the bedside table echoed through my chest. I didn't know why her words stung so much. I agreed with them. We weren't supposed to have done this.

But suddenly, I wanted to know her reasons. Why wassheso pissed off that this had happened?

"Why?" I asked, turning to Sadie once more.

“Why what?”

“Why shouldn't we have done this?”

Her brows bunched together. I was starting to recognize her expressions. This was her irritated look. I was pissing her off.

Good.

It would be easier to stay away from each other if we were at odds. Maybe if we hadn't jumped into bed together—or rather, jumped each other all over the place—I’d have seen this look earlier and we wouldn't be here, dealing with this.

But who the hell was I kidding? We’d been at each other’s throats since the moment we met. It didn't make me want her any less. In fact, it just made me want her more. The friction between us was like lighter fuel on my desire.

Was it just desire? I didn’t know anymore.

“Are you crazy?” she said, sitting up. “I’m paying Grayscale to get my store ready to open. Your friend or boss or whatever he is to you is marrying my sister. This store was—is—supposed to be my new leaf. I'm supposed to be a new Sadie, and yet here I am in bed with basically a stranger—”

"A stranger!" I exclaimed, the word like an arrow to the chest. “Is that what I am?”

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