Page 123 of Give & Take

“What?” I whisper.

He turns me around, looking into my eyes. He really does look like a prince, with his hair curling across his forehead; his earnest eyes locked on mine.

I feel like he came from some other place, like I conjured him up. But his hands when he takes mine underwater are solid and firm.

“I’m in love with you,” he says. “And you don’t have to say anything back. I just needed to make sure you heard. It was burning me up inside to feel it and not let you know.”

I’m slick with salt water, my hair in wet strands that stick to my face. But my mouth is suddenly dry. My heart beats like a timpani, but my mouth won’t move.

Raph looks unsure, but it only lasts a flash. He comes forward and kisses me, oncemore, on the cheek.

“I know you have doubts, Sunshine. But take my love and keep it wherever you need to, so you remember how much you’re loved. No matter what happens. And maybe keep your heart open for me. Just a little.”

I nod. That I can manage. That, I think I know how to do now.

Chapter 34

Raphael

The oven timer dings, and Aurora, who’s been sitting cross-legged in front of it as rapt as if it were a movie, jumps up, tearing over to the living room. “Nova!” she yells. “It’s time!!”

It’s a week later, and we’re practicing our baking skills for Lana’s birthday next Wednesday.

The summer’s almost over.

“Time to pull it out of the oven,” I say. I’ve been working on teaching the girls that restraint I used to be so good at. But maybe because I suck at it now I haven’t been a good teacher.

“It still has to cool,” Nova says wisely.

“But this is a test cake!” Aurora said. “Raph said we could test it in the middle!”

“Nova’s right,” I say, pulling on the polka dotted oven mitts and taking out the cake. “We still have to let it cool.”

Nova sticks her tongue out at her sister. “Hey!” I say. “Aurora’s right too, this is a test cake, so we get to see if ittastes good before we ice it. And because of that”—I point to Nova’s mouth—“Aurora gets the first taste.”

“No fair!” Nova says.

“Extremely fair,” I say.

We debate the level of insult involved in sticking out tongues versus calling people names, which leads to a discussion about the morality of not considering a person’s whole story when forming a judgment on them. I think we all learn a few things, and by the time I look at the clock next, it’s time to try out the birthday cake.

This is our test run for Lana’s birthday cake. The real one we’re putting together next week, on her actual birthday.

“Remember we’re going to have to get things going the minute your mom walks out the door next week.”

Nova rattles off our list of respective responsibilities. She’s going to bring the backpack with the special cake pans and fondant material she’s hidden in her closet. Aurora’s going to bring the bag of decorations hidden in hers. We’re going to make and assemble the cake all morning, and decorate in the afternoon. Then Mac is going to drive Lana home from work, with some excuse he hasn’t come up with yet but Cal assures me is going to be good.

And then…surprise!

“Are you sure she’s going to like this?” I ask Nova as I stuff my mouth with outrageously delicious fluffy vanilla cake.

“I don’t know why you keep asking me. You’re thegrownup.”

“Yeah but you know your mom best. She really doesn’t seem like she does well with surprises.”

“She loved the breakfast in bed for mother’s day!” Aurora reminds her sister.

“I guess, but it wasn’t really a surprise since the smoke alarm went off.”

---