Page 125 of Give & Take

“I have…fallen in love with this town, with you guys, and…” Well fuck, I didn’t mean to do this, but here I am. “And your mom.”

Nova’s eyes snap to mine. “Love?”

“I love you too, Raph!” Aurora exclaims, gleefully nearly falling off her stool again. I hold her up with a hand squeezed on her little shoulder. But my eyes remain on Nova.

This is tricky territory, and I didn’t mean to be so baldly obvious. I was just going to test the waters with the girls just like we’re testing this cake. But I should have known Nova would see right through me.

“I care about you guys, and I would love to figure out a way to stay here. So I’m asking how you’d feel about that,” I say.

Nova shrugs. But her arms are tense, just like her fists.

“It’s okay if you don’t want me to,” I say, even though the words feel like tiny daggers. “All feelings are valid here. I’m just wondering. But…” I run a hand over my hair. Shit. I should have run this by Lana first. Except Lana would have said a hard no, and then I’d be leaving the girls out of it, when this is their family.

Fuck me. I suddenly understand what it’s like to be Lana, with all her millions of worried thoughts.

Or Nova.

“I saw you guys kissing,” Nova says.

Aurora screws up her little face.

My stomach screws up just the same. “Oh?” I say, not giving anything away in case she’s bluffing. But we have been getting sloppy lately. I can’t help it, I’m weak when it comes to Lana. If she’s in the room with me, I need to be near her. If she’s looking at me, I’m already looking at her.

What I just said to the girls is true—I love Lana.

I’m in love with her, and I think I’ve known it since the minute she looked down her nose at me in that concession line. It’s that sixth sense I’ve got. That intuition. It never fucking lies.

“When we were at the dirt track last weekend watching Chris,” Nova says. “You guys left us with Shelby and you said you were getting French fries and I forgot to tell you I was thirsty so I ran after you even though Shelby was calling me and?—”

She goes pink in the face.

Fuck. I remember that. We did go to the concession. We just took a tiny detour. I pulled her around the side of the building, out of sight of everyone else, or so I thought. I leaned her up against the wall and whispered in her ear I wanted to?—“

I clear my throat.

“I’m sorry, Nova. I didn’t mean for you to see that.”

“See what?” Aurora asks, clearly confused.

“Raph has kissing feelings for Mom.”

Aurora blinks.

“So,” I say, wiping at my jaw. “You don’t like that, Nova?”

“I don’t like that you guys are pretending we’re a family, when you’re leaving!”

The last words come out in a shout, and Nova jumps off the stool, thundering from the room.

I look over at Aurora, my hand over my mouth now.

She blinks. Then she smiles. “Are you going to be my daddy now? I already have one, but I like you better.”

“Aurora!” I grimace. “You can’t say that, honey.”

“Oh.” She looks chagrinned. Upset, even. She looks down as if ashamed. It’s the same look she gets when she thinks she’s in trouble.

“No,” I say reaching over and scooping her up. “Oh no, sweetheart, I take that back. You can say whatever you want. Your feelings are important, and…I’d love to be your daddy, sweetheart. But your real daddy is always going to be a part of your life, okay?”

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