Page 32 of Give & Take

The thought makes me feel like boiling oil is rolling around inside of me.

“Most people call me Raph,” Raphael says, his hand back on the railing. He looks pointedly at me, like I’m the only one here. “Except Lana.”

I refuse to call him that. It’s too familiar.

“Although,” he muses, “when I was achildthey called me Raffy.”

Christine laughs heartily again, introducing herself as she sticks the box inside her giant handbag ever-so-casually.

She looks over at me with a waggle of brows, and I feel like a fool for the jumble of feelings I just had. I love Chris to the ends of the earth, even if she did just gift me a giant dong.

I tolerate Raphael. That’s it.

Suddenly, I gather myself enough to realize Raphael’s alone. “Where are the girls?” I ask.

“Mommy!” Aurora calls, answering my question as she streaks across the patio. Relief and happiness flood me. And not a small amount of foolishness. Iopen my arms to catch my bouncy-haired Aurora, squeezing her tight and feeling instantly calmer.

When I open my eyes, I see Raphael’s watching us with a goofy smile, his chin resting on his forearms, right above his stupid sexy leather bracelet. His eyes look like melted caramel.

I look away fast.

Nova appears at the entrance of the restaurant, having followed behind her sister at a dignified pace.

“Hey sweetheart,” Chris says.

“Hello,” she says drily. But she smiles. She loves Chris.

I pull Nova in too before she can escape.

Nova tolerates me for only a moment before stepping back, planting her hands on her hips as she glares at Raphael. “Weweregoing to pretend you forgot us at the beach,” she says. “But you had to come here and say hi all normal.”

“Sorry, Nov,” Raphael grimaces. “But today is judgment day, and I can’t pull any pranks your mom might fire me for today.”

So he hadn’t forgotten. I half wanted him to, just so I’d have something to ding him on.

I swallow hard, my throat feeling suddenly dry.

I’d planned on discussing things when I got home, but I don’t think I can stand feeling this way a moment longer. I set Aurora down and check my watch. I have a few minutes left on my break, and Chris doesn’t start for another twenty. Might as well bite the bullet.

“Speaking of which,” I say, “You okay to watch the girls for a minute?” I ask Chris.

“All the time in the world for these two!” Chris says. “You guys want some fries?”

Aurora’s already climbing on her lap as Nova crowds in on her other side.

I jerk my chin at Raphael. “Can I talk to you? In private?”

Raphael lifts a brow but says nothing, just walks around the opening to the patio and follows me inside. I feel him behind me like he’s a moving bonfire.

I pull out a chair at the bar for him, the chirp of it on the floor jarring.

Raphael, to my surprise, looks worried.

“Can I get you something to drink?” I ask, to soften things slightly. I don’t want this to be like I’m some kind of executioner.

Raphael shakes his head. “We’re not disturbing you, are we? Mac said you take your last fifteen at noon. And that he didn’t mind if the kids came in.”

I’m a little surprised this trip wasn’t spontaneous, that Raphael had taken the time to plan it out so he wouldn’t be interrupting me while on the job. I can’t help think of my old life, back in the city, when on the rare days Mike had the kids, he’d barge into my office unannounced, immediately launching into a gripe about how hard babysitting was.