Page 55 of Give & Take

The girls squeal, jumping off their stools to the clatter of spoons and splash of milk and cereal on the counter. “Raph!”

I don’t even care about the little messes they make.My heart squeezes as Raphael drops to his knees, arms wide. I’m pretty sure this morning ritual has become my favorite part of every day. The way Aurora leaps at him like a flying monkey and Nova appears next to him, chattering about all the cool things she read in the book I guess they’ve been reading together. She read ahead last night, she tells him this morning. The dragon reallywasin that cave!

When his eyes meet mine, I quickly resume wiping the counter like I wasn’t staring, heart melting into goo.

He smiles at me. “Morning.”

“Morning,” I say briskly, shaking out the cloth and hanging it on the sink.

“Is that a new shirt?”

My cheeks flush. “This? Oh, yeah. I guess.”

I guess?

He presses his lips together as if needing to physically prevent himself from commenting. I very much want to hear what he thinks, but I can’t do that. That would be a step backward, right?

His eyes linger just a moment too long. Long enough that Aurora has to poke him to get his attention.

“You didn’t say it yet!” she says.

“Right,” Raph says, dragging his eyes from mine and focusing his full attention on the girls.

I let out the breath I’d been holding, surprised to find my hands slightly jittery as I return to packing my bag.

Raph props his hands on his hips. “Okay. Who’s ready to make the day our…”

“Bunny!” shouts Aurora.

“Sea cucumber,” says Nova drily, though she’s grinning too.

This is their game, spurred from a day last week when Raphael asked them who was ready to make the day their oyster, and Aurora asked why it had to be an oyster, and Raphael said it didn’t—what should it be? I love this game.

“Oooh, tough one. Mom? Who’s the winner today?” Raphael asks.

But I frown, holding my phone in my hand. I’d just picked it up to choose my running playlist. But there’s a text there. One that has a dark cloud swallowing all the feel-good nerves of the morning.

“Everything okay?” Raphael asks.

“Mom?” Aurora asks. “Is it a bunny or a coo-cumber?”

I stuff the phone in my bag, my mood dampened considerably. “It’s your father.”

“That’s not one of the options,” Nova says.

I buckle my bag, already feeling a headache springing at my temples. Then I force a smile. “He’s coming up for the weekend.”

Raphael studies me intently. “Is that… okay?”

He looks ready to defend my honor. But it’s the words that soften the sharpness at my temple.

Mike used to ask that constantly, when our marriage was on its downward slide.“You okay?”

“Yes,” I say. “It’s fine.”

The thing is, my ex used a completely different tone when he asked that. It wasn’t checking in. It inferred I was losing it. There’s a world of difference inthose two tones. Raphael may have been signing up for his learner’s permit around the time I said my vows to Mike, but in two words—on top of his completely respectful and annoyingly firm adherence to my boundaries—he’s shown he’s miles ahead of my ex-husband in emotional maturity.

The girls are looking at me as if unsure what the best reaction is.

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