Page 58 of Over & Out

“It’s why I’m going to be doing the sequel,” he says, eyes on mine.

I can’t help it—I squeal. “What? There’s going to be a sequel? I thought they said it would ‘firmly be a stand-alone!’”

He looks almost boyishly happy to have made me happy. “Well, they’re firmly wrong.”

“Why didn’t I see any correspondence about it? Tru never mentioned it at all.”

“Because I just decided on it right now.”

I frown. “What? Wait, did you already turn down the role or something?”

Hopper looks down, almost awkwardly, studying our joined hands. Funny he’s staring at them while I can’t look.

He clears his throat. “I told them never in a million fucking years would I play that part again. I think that’s verbatim. That’s why they called it a firm stand-alone.”

“Hopper! Are you serious?”

“Yes.”

To my horror, my eyes fill with tears. That’s more than once tonight. What is wrong with me? I let go of Hopper’s hand to swipe at my cheeks, looking away.

“Chris?”

“I’m fine.” But my cracked voice betrays me.

“Are you?” Hopper, bless him, doesn’t take my hand again. I don’t think I could take it.

He’s quiet, waiting for me to answer.

I consider saying something to hide myself. Hiding is what I’m good at. But we’re past that, aren’t we?Iam, anyway. Besides, I asked him to be straight with me—the least I can be is straight with him.

“Did I tell you I was in the system? I don’t think I did. But maybe you know.” I know I’m rambling. But now that I’ve started, I can’t stop. “After my dad died, I didn’t have anywhere to go. My experience wasn’t the worst. I’ve heard the horror stories. I could havebeenthe horror stories. But I still was hit, neglected, hiton…” I swallow hard, remembering that one dad who came home drunk and told me he knew a way I could make some spending money.

I shake the memory away.

“When I was sixteen, I stayed for a month with this really elderly woman. Linda. I loved her. And she loved to read. Her house was filled with books. I found a Duke book there. That was the first night I disappeared into a world that wasn’t filled with pain and ugliness. I’d read books before, but not like that. It was just silliness and romance and…honesty. I kept that book. She let me have it. I still have it. And somehow…” I put a hand over my eyes as if that will somehow make this easier. “Somehow, all those years later, you captured everything the Duke was. You didn’t make fun of him or act like you were better than those stories. Youwerehim.”

Hopper doesn’t say anything. But he also hasn’t made his excuses and suggested we leave. So I keep going. “Earlier this year, I was in an accident. And, well…there you were in the movie. At a time when I really needed you.”

I drop my hand, but still, I don’t dare to look at his face. “This is mortifying, you know. I bet you’ve never confessed to your jerk boss that he inadvertently saved your life.” My voice cracks onlife.

When I finally sneak a look at Hopper, he’s staring at me.

“Sorry,” I whisper. “That was way too much information.”

Hopper shakes his head. “No. I’m just kind of”—he clears his throat—“humbled, I guess. I always think I had a shit childhood, but then I see how much worse it could have been. I’m sorry you went through that, Chris.”

I smile, relieved he doesn’t seem to care that I basically fangirled all over him. I guess he’s used to that. “Mine wasn’t all bad,” I say. “I have lots of happy memories from before.”

Lots of unhappy ones, too, but none of that matters now.

“I’m glad,” Hopper says, his voice kind of gruff.

A beat passes. He turns away, but his side is pressed up against me. Like he wants to keep contact. “Were you hurt?”

At my frown, he says, “In the accident.”

“Oh. That. I’m fine. I have this wonky shoulder that sometimes hurts still, and I…”I still can’t ride.“But I’m fine. Anyway,” I say brightly, leaning back on my hands, ignoring the little twinge from my shoulder that seems to pop up just because I mentioned it. “You don’t have to play him again, Hop. You’d make a lot of people happy if you did, but this is your career. You should do what makes you happy. I said that before.”

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