Page 95 of Kill Your Darlings

Tears started in the back of my eyes.I said shakily, trying for a joke, “That I love you?”

“That I loveyou.”Finn said it steadily, seriously.

I shook my head, but he said gently, “Of course I do.You’ve known for a long time.”

Yes.Although these last few days there had been reason to believe he’d changed, that I’d lost that love.

I’d done little enough to deserve it.

“It’s terrible timing,” I said.

“I don’t agree.”His mouth moved against mine with tender insistence, and we were kissing again.Kissing till we were out of breath.

Maybe he was right.If his plan didn’t work, if I did end up in prison, the memory of this, the promise of this would probably be the only thing that could keep me sane.

“I don’t want you to pay the price for my mistakes.”

Finn said, “There’s always a price for loving someone.”

I wasn’t sure what that meant—other than once you loved someone, anything that hurt them, hurt you.That was true.

Finn’s hands continued to move over me, exploring, pleasuring.When his large capable hand closed around my cock, I pushed into it, making encouraging sounds, willingly giving up control, letting Finn set the pace, shoving into that sure and knowledgeable grip…teamwork makes the dream work…

It took almost no effort from either of us before I was spilling over in high tide, coming in pulses like the waves rushing the pilons beneath us.My heart pounded in time to each silvery surge.Distantly, I heard the sounds I was making, somewhere between laughter and tears.

Finn nuzzled me, making comforting sounds.I could hear that little thread of humor in his voice, but I didn’t mind—had never minded—because he wasn’t laughing at me.Or if he was, it was with affection.He did not think I was a joke.

We continued to kiss and touch.It was all nice.Everything with Finn was nice.But for me, this was the best part.

He said, “The first time you let me crash at your loft, I saw you had a very battered copy ofHow to Make Friends and Influence Peoplein the back of your bookshelf.”

“Oh no.”I laughed self-consciously.

“I think that’s when I started to love you.”

“Jesus.That’s…”

“I finally felt like I was starting to understand you.”

I shook my head.“I just wanted to be liked when I was a kid.That’s all there is to understand.”

“Youareliked.You’re kind and funny and smart.But mostly, you care about people and it comes through.You didn’t have to organize that management buyout.You could have left early on.”

“Well, it failed, so it wasn’t much of an effort.Anyway, I’m not sure why everyone thinks I had so many options.I don’t have any more options than anyone else.”

“Bullshit.”Finn said it gently.

I was silent for a moment, and then I admitted, “Rudolph told me he put my name before TM’s board of directors.”

It was Finn’s turn for silence.

“Good,” he said at last.“It’s the obvious move for you.”

I half sat up.“I can’tacceptit!Even if they do offer—and I don’t think they would, especially if I end up going to trial—”

Finn sat up, too.“Whoa, whoa.What’s all the uproar?”

“You know better than anyone what the uproar is!”

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