Page 19 of Trusting Skulls

I go to my emails, finding a new one from them.

It’s the moving company information.

I scroll down to the previous one. It’s about the new company they hired to clean the pool. My finger moves on to the next … it’s about the landscaping. My face suddenly gets hot, and I push it away from me.

Dirk picks it up and leisurely goes through my emails while eating his breakfast.

I stare at mine.

“Why don’t you open another package?” Jesse suggests as she pushes one of the boxes toward me.

My fingers fumble with it as I watch Dirk out the corner of my eye. I wonder what he’s thinking about the correspondence between my parents and me.

I pluck the letter from the box and read it to myself.

Lexie,

Remember that day you and Kelsie were talking about handwriting letters? I remember how you talked about seeing your thoughts come to life at your hand. It got me thinking that maybe you enjoyed writing. I could be wrong, but you spoke about it with such passion … I think I’m on to something.

Anyway, I hope that helps explain my gift. I also whittled a little stand for it. My dad taught me how to do it when I was a boy. I haven’t done it for years, but it’s kind of growing on meagain. It gives me time to think while keeping my hands busy. I hope you enjoy it.

This is only week two, and I’m really missing home. You would think the military would have given me some inner fortitude for this, but no. Only ten more weeks to go.

P.S. That includes missing you too.

Ash

I look inside the box and find a beautiful glass dip pen with an ink well. Beside it is a handmade wooden base to hold it. He must have carved the wooden Toto, too. That makes it even more special.

My gaze bounces between my phone and the gift from Ash. The letter from him is so personal. It’s nothing like the correspondence from the people who brought me into this world. Theirs is … clinical.

“What is that?” Dirk asks as I roll the pen in my hand.

Tears sting at the corner of my eyes, and for the first time since he left, I allow myself to miss him. “The most thoughtful gift I’ve ever received.”

“Oh, baby,” Jesse says, reaching for my hand across the table.

Dirk leans back in his chair, rubbing his temples. “Lexie, I can see from these emails that your parents have treated you like nothing more than a property manager. Not a daughter. In your heart, you know that. But goddammit girl, you don’t deserve to be treated that way.”

I pull my hand out of Jesse’s and lay the pen in the little wooden holder. “It’s all I know. What I don’t know is how to do this.” I wave my hand over the gift. “There’s no way I deserve Ash’s kindness.”

“Why not?” he asks.

“I … well, you know why. I’m … I’m … just not good enough for him.”

“Because you let men use you?”

My head falls and I nod, wishing I could melt into the floor. “Ash deserves better.”

He leans forward. “We’re not talking about what he deserves. We’re talking about you.” His attention goes to Jesse. “Get Raffe up here.”

My head pulls back in surprise. “Jackson’s dad?”

Jesse stands, evidently agreeing with him. “On it.” She grabs her phone and heads outside.

“What are you talking about?”

He nods toward the other box on the table. “Open it.”

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