Page 75 of Grumpy Billionaire Seeking Wife

"That sounds cool," I say, nodding. "I'm really glad that you and Thunder seem to be getting along."

"Yeah, he is so sweet. Did I tell you he wrote me a poem?"

"He wrote you a poem? What?"

"Yeah, he said he was up one night, thinking about me, and it inspired him. You want to hear it?"

"Sure." I look at my watch. "I've got some time before I have to catch the train. You want to give me the context, or is there no context?"

"We had been chatting about dinosaurs, and..."

"Dinosaurs?" I interrupt her. "Wait, what? How did the topic of dinosaurs come up?"

"Well, we were saying it'd be really cool if maybe on one of our dates, we went to the natural history museum. And he was telling me that he was curious if I believed in creation or evolution."

"You mean, do you believe in God or not? Was that what he was asking?"

"Yeah. And I told him that I have a mix of both. I definitely believe in God, but we can't ignore the fact that there's been some sort of evolution. But the way I see it is that God made evolution. Well, anyway, we started talking about dinosaurs, and he said something about that conversation sparked this in him."

"Okay. Well, that sounds cool." I don't know what to say. I want to ask how old he is. I don't know anyone over the age of ten who really talks that much about dinosaurs, except for maybe paleontologists. And the only paleontologist I know is Ross fromFriends, and he is a fictional character. But I’m not going to say anything. I don't want to get her upset. And maybe Thunder really is that deep. Maybe he isn't going to be like Rudolfo. Maybe he will be cool. Okay, let me bring it up.

"You ready?"

"Yeah." I try to look happy and positive. "So I'll read you the little note he sent before the poem so you understand where he's coming from."

"Okay."

"Actually, I'll read you the messages that we were sending back and forth before that, so there's more context."

"Okay," I say, nodding slowly. I don't want to tell her that if she needs to give me this much context, it probably isn’t a good sign. “So, I said to him, 'Hey, how's it going?' And he responds with, 'Just thinking about you.’ And I say, 'Oh, I was just thinking about you, too.' And he says, ‘Well, if you were to be in the Museum of Natural History as an exhibit, what would you be?' And I said, ‘A Tyrannosaurus Rex. What would you be?' And he said that he'd be a brontosaurus. And then I said, 'I see you more as a pterodactyl.' And he said?—"

"I think you can get into the poem, Erica," I say, cutting her off. "I don't want to be rude." I make a face. "But my mom is expecting me, and..."

"Oh, it's okay. I'll send you screenshots so you can read the texts while you're on the train."

"Sounds good." I nod. "I'll do that."

"Okay. Here is the poem.If you were a Tyrannosaurus Rex, I'd Rex, Rex, Rex you because you'd be like the sex, sex, sex of the brontosaurus. Can you hear me? Can you be me? Have you heard of a Stegosaurus? It's got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 of those things on its back. I don't know what they're called, but can you fly like a pterodactyl in the sky? I'm so high. I smoke weed because I don't think it's a sin or a creed. Have you heard of the triceratops? It's got two horns like a rhino. Oh, Erica, I love your name. I'm not high. I can fly. You are in the sky with me tonight. Can you see that we're going to be together all the time, all the time in my bed or yours? I don't care. Do you care? I don't. I'm just thinking of you. I'm just inspired by you. I think you're going to make me a better man."

She pauses. I try not to burst out laughing. I don't know what to say. I don't really consider it a poem. I don't consider it a song, and I don't consider it good.

"So, what do you think?" Erica says excitedly. "Isn't that so sweet?"

"Yeah. It seems like he was really inspired by those dinosaurs. That must've been a scintillating conversation you had about the natural history museum."

"I know. I can't wait to meet him. I mean, some guys, all they want to do is talk about sex and ask you what your favorite positions are, and he goes deeper than that."

"Yep. He is super deep," I say, trying not to laugh. Is Erica losing her mind? Does she really think that's good? “I was going to say that.” I lick my lips nervously.

Erica stares at me, nodding. "You were going to say what?"

I start giggling.

"I'm sorry," I laugh. "I was just... I can't stop laughing now. I was just... I'm sorry." I burst out laughing, and she just stares at me for a couple of seconds.

"Why are you laughing?" she says, moaning. "You think it sucked?"

"I mean, I don't want to say it sucked, but, girl, really? Are you being serious right now?" She leans forward, and her lips start twitching, and she starts laughing. "Okay. So maybe it's not as romantic as something that Percy Shelly would write.

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