Page 93 of Revelry

“You need to fucking hurry up. Another fifteen minutes until they’re done, and then we’re both dead if they come back and find us when she’s high as a fucking kite. Where’s my money?”

“You’ll get your money after the shots.”

“Sh—” I close my eyes.

“Shh, that’s it, sweetheart. Just lie back and relax, we’ll do everything else.

“What? No. I have to go. I’m leaving.” I try sitting up, but I can’t. My body is too heavy, too tired. Something tickles my lip—powder, I think, as it’s brushed across the tip of my nose and my upper lip. Someone pushes a finger into my mouth, and there’s more of the bitter-sweet powder rubbed across my gums. I have a vague recollection of Levi doing this to me once before, when I smile. “You finished early?”

There’s a pause, and I want to open my eyes so I can see his gorgeous face as he smiles down at me, but my lids are so heavy, and my face feels numb.

“Yeah, I did. Now, let’s get you out of those clothes, Ali.”

I laugh. “It’s weird … you said my name.”

His hand freezes against my stomach, but a second later he pulls my jeans down my legs. Cold air dances along my bare thighs. He runs his hand over them. “Fuck, she’s gorgeous.”

“The deal wasn’t touching her. It was getting her picture,” Leif says. His tone is sharp and bitter, angry again.

I blink in confusion, attempting to cover myself with my hands, trying to sit up. I can’t make my body do anything though. I’m weighed down with leaden limbs. My breath squeezes painfully through my lungs as I try to fight against the tide of sleep threatening to drag me under.

“Keep your fucking panties on. I’m just testing out the merchandise,” the other voice says.

“Don’t,” Leif hisses.

“What?” I murmur, but my voice is small and strained, and my mouth is dry, so, so dry. My head spins when I try to sit up, so I lie back and close my eyes. “Where’s Levi?”

I’m aware of a loud clicking noise, over and over. It’s like a mechanical wasp buzzing around my head. That thought makes me laugh. I bring my arms up across my face, covering the bright light, but someone removes them.

“Come on, Ali,” Levi says, placing my hands back over my stomach. I like how warm they are, so I press them against me, but he shakes me off. More buzzing. More mechanical wasp. I shoo it away, feeling my whole body growing heavier.

A raspy unfamiliar voice says, “Camera fucking loves you, babe.”

I don’t know what that means, but my head spins. I feel as if I might be sick again, and then I must pass out, because I don’t remember who was talking and where I am.

When I wake, it’s to shouting voices. I’m cold and trembling, and the acrid stench of vomit fills the room.

“Ali, baby,” Cooper says. His hands are warm and sweaty on my body. A blanket covers me. In the background, Levi shouts and a brief flash shows him punching Leif. Zed is behind Leif, and for a minute I think he’s protecting his brother, but he’s not—he’s holding him still while Levi busts up his brother’s face. Deb screams. Like a wild animal, she launches herself at Leif. Levi snags her around the waist and pulls her back. I close my eyes because watching their movements back and forth hurts my brain.

Cooper touches my face and I blink up at him. Sweat beads on his brow, his lips, those beautiful lips that are turned down in a frown. “Coop. I don’t feel good.”

“Shh, it’s okay,” he says, wrapping me in his arms. His body is trembling, or maybe it’s mine? No, he’s shaking too. His breathing seesaws out of his lungs as he squeezes me tightly. “An ambulance is coming; you’re okay. You’re okay.”

But I don’t believe him, because my head spins as if it’s on a tilt-a-whirl. And I have to leave him. And that’s not okay.

That will never be okay.

Ali lies on the bed, her head propped up against a fluffy pillow, consumed by sheets and bedding, her small body swallowed by the hospital gown she wears. Her face is pale and dark circles rim her eyes. If I ever find Leif, or that Gainy fucker who did this to her, I will strangle every breath from their lungs. I tremor with rage as I think about how afraid she must have been, how lost, and alone. She’d needed me and I’d been on stage, singing my heart out to thousands of nameless faces, gyrating my hips and pretending as if I wanted to fuck each and every one of them. Some days my job just feels so surreal. Some days I don’t even feel like a whole person, but just the shell of a man who pretends to be fine.The great pretender.

If I had a normal job, none of this would have happened, including meeting her. She would have been better off.

Ali’s whole body jolts, and her hands ball into fists. Her eyes flutter. I lean forward and gently stroke the inside of her wrist.

“Hey,” I whisper, and her hands unclench as she slowly opens her eyes. I run my fingertips over her forehead, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“Hey,” she says through a raspy throat. She lifts her free hand to her neck, but stops halfway when her movements tug on the IV in her hand.

“What happened?” she croaks.

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